Me enter.
*clears throat and makes an imaginary microphone with my hand and points it towards me*

"I could just write all the shit about me but then what's the fun in that? So I'll just leave you with that.

All that you need to know is that I am extremely bored with this lockdown in my country, so I am writing, my second hobby. The first hobby is singing at the top of my lungs to annoy my neighbours at 2 am. Which is why I am one of the most professional bathroom singer. I also tried to learn curse words in many languages during the second wave; so far i have succeeded somewhat.

I don't have a favourite author, book, song, food, other anything else, so don't bother asking. I have dislikes and likes but you don't need to know that. Right? Besides that... Yeah, that's it.

I wanted to put something original here but... what can I say? So, hope you enjoy my books and what I write. Thank you"
 *bows down and leaves.*
*curtain start closing*
*a hand stops them* 

Me enter again
"If you are bored, hit my PM (discord: oui non idk#2075) to talk. We can talk about nothing and everything :)"

*curtains close peacefully this time, without interruption*