She was always alone.... she never had friends she barely knew what it was like to love someone.... she was perfect.... but so broken.... lost.... À̴̱͝L̜̳ͮ̉O̴̰̝̞̽̄͊͟ͅÑ͖̖̲̐̒͗E̷͔̎͠͠͝ͅ she never deserved to be neglected, and yet she was. Before her all i wanted was the control over what was rightfully mine... now its more complicated, i want my own... my own body so i can forever hold her... and cherish her.... but our kinds aren't meant to be... we could be killed if anyone found out. The risks could be taken if the love is worth waitin. She is perfect... and i want her all to myself.... and it angers me every time i see them with her, they dont belong with her, i do.... and i will prove that too her.... or I'll just force her to see my way... (This is an Anti x Reader, yes this is why i gave up on my other one... but don't expect me not to give up on this one lol anyways enjoy! Warning there is explicit content in this, sexual content, murder, suicide, cursing, racism, and other triggering topics will be mentioned in this story so please read on your own terms <3 love y'all)

I've always had a feeling that I would die young. Ever since I started pondering on deaths door I've had this feeling. I could care less about the hell and heaven shenanigans, but death. I want it. The end of my life. I want to be in my suit, in my coffin, in the ground and my soul to be gone. I've been waiting for 16 years, yet no sign of death opening his door no matter how many times I ring his doorbell. Yeah, I enjoy thinking about my end. Especially at moments like this... *** #1 physical #1 cuteguys #1 addiction #2 self-esteem *** Started: 7 November 2022 Finished: 18 April 2024

Adam's life has never been his own. Raised under the shadow of a cold, domineering father, he was forced into a life of violence at a young age. Trained to be ruthless and taught that power is the only currency that matters, Adam's existence has always been about survival. Beneath the hardened exterior, though, lies the weight of deep emotional scars-ones that even time hasn't been able to heal. Just as Adam begins to unravel under the pressure of his past, an unexpected event sends his life spiralling out of control. Everything he thought he knew is shattered, and the fragile balance he maintained between survival and self-destruction crumbles. Struggling with the aftermath, Adam's world turns upside down, forcing him to confront the ghosts of his past and the dark path he's been set on. Driven by the overwhelming need to reclaim his sense of self, Adam decides to target the one thing that has always held him back, his father's empire. But revenge comes at a cost, and as Adam teeters on the edge of despair, he must decide whether destroying his father's legacy will free him or finally push him over the brink. (Guys this is my first story and first time writing on wattpad and uhh I did my best. I started this story in English class and am developing on it rn since I rlly like it lol so uhh don't judge. Have fun and thank you) This story will contain the following: - Abuse - Suicide - Violence - Killing (And uhh i might forget the rest so I'm really sorryy)

"and you left me with bad habits like cracking my knuckles and wearing your sweater because the smell of you still lingers. you left me chewing at the skin of my skin on my lips because maybe just maybe if it's gone the taste of you will be too, but the problem is i can't tear off my skin. so i'm left with the shivers down my spine when my body remembers your hands running up my back as you kissed me and it paralyzes me because i miss it. i miss you. i miss smiling between kisses because damn you just made me happy and I thought I made you just as happy because you would smile and whisper "what" but i would just shake my head and pull you close and it was real. it was. all of it. so why did you leave me? why?"

*Completely Edited!* Everyone's done something in their life that they wish they could change. For me, it started a couple years ago. Have you ever felt all alone? Like no one in the world cares? So, if you have, you feel like cutting yourself, like, well absolutely depressed. It started in seventh grade for me, only 13 years old and wanting to feel like I was dead. I shouldn't have done a lot of the stuff that I did, but I did them anyway. Screw the consequences was my motto. Maybe I could have handled it differently, no I most definitely could have handled everything differently. I felt like no one cared but, people do care it would be against human nature for them not to care. You have your friends, family, schoolmates, and even your pets. Try to take your life into account, imagine what could happen if you handle the situation one way or another. That's just my advice though. This is my story.

Have you ever felt like life wasn't enough, like you were going through the motions day in, day out, all you wanted was a change. Well one day I woke up and made that change, I was no longer the well behaved boy that did as he was told, I was a new person and I wanted to do things my way. I wanted to do what made me feel alive, even if that was murder of innocent people, I wanted to grab someone and watch the life drain out of their faces, it pleased me.. it made me feel alive. This is my story of heartbreak and turmoil, friends lost and friends gained, families torn apart by my needs. This is my life, and I'm proud to be the man I am. Dated created 9th August 2020 Date completed 15th August 2020 Word count 50,000-60,000

TRIGGER WARNING THIS STORY IS GRAPHIC AND SHOWS DISPLAYS OF VIOLENCE *CURRENTLY EDITING* Suicide, the very word is enough to make you cringe. Depending on who you are depends on how you view it. You may judge those who commit it by calling them weak willed but then how could you know that? Have you ever felt the grips of sorrow deep within your soul that you feared everything that once made you feel safe? Have you ever been so lost in a sticky heavy darkness that you felt you could never be found? Have you ever looked in the mirror and seen an empty shell looking back? No? I didn't think so. I don't think you should judge something you could never begin to comprehend. But for those of you that have i am truly sorry for what ever pushed you to this edge and i hope that you listen to my tale of woe and do what i should have done first. I am going to tell you the story of how my life spiraled out of control and how i overcame it all. My name is Roxanne Kane and I am going to tell you why I wanted to kill myself.

Part 2 of "Doubts" It was that same feeling I felt deep inside me the day my grandparents left me. My stomach began to cringe. My throat was in knots. My breathing had gotten hard. My instincts were telling me something just wasn't right. I felt useless and alone... I had always knew pain my whole life but this was next level. That feeling of holding back and regret filled my veins with agony. I was lost in my thoughts. My heart felt colder and colder with every minute that passed by. Who am I ? Who am I really ? What is my purpose in this life that I lived? That I once knew ..... why did this bad luck fall upon my life? What did I do to deserve this ? I'm cursed. I have to be. I cried so much in that hospital bed that no tears seemed to want to fall anymore. I had no tears left in me to shed. When Akeem left this room, I knew it would be the last time that I would see him. My better half. My Ace. My love. My husband. My life. Gone. Forever. It wasn't confirmed but I knew it. I just knew it. Life fucked me hard. So why not throw it back.

There are a lot of things you don't really think about until they happen to you. Take rape, for instance. I always thought, "That won't happen to me. I have a boyfriend. I trust him. He would never take advantage of me like that..." I couldn't have been more wrong. Love in this day and age is often confused for manipulation and abuse. The warning signs are here. The things we say will tell us everything that is wrong. You are worth more than what you think you are. It's not your fault. If they tell you otherwise, get out. Burn the bridge. Always remember someone is waiting for you to walk into their life. Someone needs you. Someone loves you. Getting away from all of the wrong people and finding the right ones could save you. I can promise you right now that it saved me. These are the journal entries and selected poems from my first experience of love that left a unpleasant taste in my mouth- quite literally. I am putting this out for the whole world to see because I hope everyone will learn from my experience. People can see. We have no excuses to continue living our lives in ignorance. ...WARNING... HARMFUL THEMES INCLUDING MENTION OF SUICIDE, SELF HARM, AND RAPE. THIS HAS EXPLICIT CONTENT. RECOVERY AND AWARENESS IS THE PURPOSE OF SHARING. DO NOT READ IF THESE THEMES ARE OFFENSIVE OR HARMFUL TO YOU.

I gave the best of myself to someone who didn't have anything to lose. I didn't know how to avoid my lover's toxic and abusive flames. My lover's twisted words were like a maze inside of my head that I couldn't escape. Sadly, my lover's actions hypnotized my thoughts and paralyzed my thinking. I learned the hard way that love isn't leaning in for a kiss, and a fist meets you halfway. Love isn't being a punching bag because someone decided they wanted to beat on you today. Love isn't saying I love you just because someone wants to keep you to themselves. I tried to be there for my lover, but I learned it is impossible to fix the broken pieces when the glass has shattered. There will always be pieces that are not repairable. However, I kept going right back to the person who I needed to walk away from. I was afraid, and I wasn't brave enough to wake up from this nightmare! I made the choice to suffer when life is meant to be lived and enjoyed. Will I find the courage to know my worth and know that I deserve better than the distasteful lies that are whispered in my ears? Will I have the strength to fight my insecurities? Will, I set myself free, or will I let my love be the death of me?