Why does life come with so many different possible answers to the same question? Which answer is the correct one and how do you know for sure? Finding your true self, amid all the decisions you're forced to make in growing up, is quite a battle, isn't it? I was doing okay. Really I was. Then I literally bumped into him and that was it. That was when everything changed. My life took a new turn and became an exciting adventure. I found myself swept along in a sea of change that I either had to swim along with, or sink and drown. It was a no brainer to swim but fully embracing the changes to the way I thought and felt was quite a journey. This is my story.

[Featured by wattpad romance, teen fiction, young adult and psychologicalnovel] Joy Jones was a seventeen-year-old kind and optimistic girl working in her grandpa's flower shop, but she had a secret. She was suffering from acute lymphoblastic leukaemia and wanted nothing, but to die peacefully. That was until Logan Kellerman, a young man with suicidal tendencies came storming into her life and stole roses from her grandpa's flower shop. Instead of running away with what he came for, he found himself falling deeper and deeper into her as she made his heart skip in delight, for she was, in her own words, a little bit of Joy. * * * from some of my readers of this book, thanks❤- ❝I LOVE YOUR STORY OKAY. THIS STORY AND YOUR WRITING- IT GIVES ME HOPE YOU KNOW.❞ - aimawrites ❝This is so different than so many stereotypical stories on here and i'm so glad i read it.❞ -lepus_leporis ❝They're both so poetic and beautiful and perfect for each other. GAHHhh I love them.❞ - alycecaswell ❝The way she vividly describes the world makes me so happy. Heat keeps rushing to my cheeks in pure euphoric joy. This book is making me so grateful for everything around me and I never want it to end.❞ - nylammeeyn [highest rank: 7 in sad] [cover by soulanatomy]

Why am I here? What is my purpose? What is the meaning of life? Why am I alive? It seems that since the dawn of time we have been asking ourselves this very question. Kings and philosophers have puzzled and theorized, and paupers and plebeians toil under the sun wondering if there's more to life. Even today we seem to be frantically running here or there trying to get the latest scoop, wondering if someone has finally figured it out. People look high and low, and they try a number of things only to still feel unhappy and dissatisfied. In my own life, the only thing that has made me truly happy and given me peace for my soul is God. He has been the chief help in combating my anxiety and depression. For me, God has been the foundation that I've placed my life around and have built my identity. I write about how I've found purpose, peace and how you can too! Jesus loves you and has an amazing plan for your life! Buckle up, and let's read about the purpose of your life and how to find real peace!

My fifty years of good or bad heartfelt life experiences written in honest, bold and direct expressions. I believe my purpose and mission are to live a passionate life and share my interesting story with the world to inspire and touch people in many ways. I took two years to write and two years to revise and edit it with the help of my third child and two professional editors. After being turned down and advised by hundred of publishers to turn my story into a novel. I kept trying but couldn't do it as it is not in me. So until last September my very special new family doctor agreed to be my first reader and gave me good comments with excitement, I decided to self publish it with the help of my youngest child. I hope to grow as a writer, and be able to share more stories with you all. During the ten years wait, I have moved out from the unsafe home and living a wonderful and happy life that I am ready to write and share my An Extraordinary Life and it continues with you all. Please tell me how you truly feel about it and share it.

Part 2 of "Doubts" It was that same feeling I felt deep inside me the day my grandparents left me. My stomach began to cringe. My throat was in knots. My breathing had gotten hard. My instincts were telling me something just wasn't right. I felt useless and alone... I had always knew pain my whole life but this was next level. That feeling of holding back and regret filled my veins with agony. I was lost in my thoughts. My heart felt colder and colder with every minute that passed by. Who am I ? Who am I really ? What is my purpose in this life that I lived? That I once knew ..... why did this bad luck fall upon my life? What did I do to deserve this ? I'm cursed. I have to be. I cried so much in that hospital bed that no tears seemed to want to fall anymore. I had no tears left in me to shed. When Akeem left this room, I knew it would be the last time that I would see him. My better half. My Ace. My love. My husband. My life. Gone. Forever. It wasn't confirmed but I knew it. I just knew it. Life fucked me hard. So why not throw it back.

I'm falling... Falling, helplessly and inevitably; completely at the mercy of the forces dragging me down. Having to trust in an entity's blind intentions and praying to God that they won't let me hit the ground. It's an incredible and horrifying feeling. A feeling that I live for. And I have realized that having something to live for makes you all the more scared of dying. (Constant uploads, and even more editing to older uploads)

~TW~: Selfharm / physical/emotional abuse / drug abuse READER INSERT 🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸 "This, this right here. This is love. This is me being concerned for your life so much that I'm disregarding my own.. And I'm not saying this to guilt you into coming back over with me and then berate you for how stupid the decision was. I'm doing this to show you, because you need to be shown what love is, and what love isn't."

My life did go to shit. Triggers: My life depression has mentions of suicidal thought, cutting, and other things related to death. It's also cringe 2018 teen stuff. If you don't like these topics, don't read this book of my experience with depression. Look for another book. Highest rank: #3 in acryforhelp. It mattered when I was younger :)

I gave the best of myself to someone who didn't have anything to lose. I didn't know how to avoid my lover's toxic and abusive flames. My lover's twisted words were like a maze inside of my head that I couldn't escape. Sadly, my lover's actions hypnotized my thoughts and paralyzed my thinking. I learned the hard way that love isn't leaning in for a kiss, and a fist meets you halfway. Love isn't being a punching bag because someone decided they wanted to beat on you today. Love isn't saying I love you just because someone wants to keep you to themselves. I tried to be there for my lover, but I learned it is impossible to fix the broken pieces when the glass has shattered. There will always be pieces that are not repairable. However, I kept going right back to the person who I needed to walk away from. I was afraid, and I wasn't brave enough to wake up from this nightmare! I made the choice to suffer when life is meant to be lived and enjoyed. Will I find the courage to know my worth and know that I deserve better than the distasteful lies that are whispered in my ears? Will I have the strength to fight my insecurities? Will, I set myself free, or will I let my love be the death of me?

CRINGE WARNING! First book I ever wrote on here!! -- "Sometimes the person who you are willing to take a bullet for is the person behind the gun." I stood peering over the cold lifeless body that lay before my eyes. I had always thought of death the enemy, but right now, I blessed it upon the person who is now at peace. Sometimes you don't need to be the smartest, or the fastest, but you do need to be wisest. They say the blood runs deeper than water, and I believe it, because even though the people that we love can turn on us and begin to hate us, they are only human, meaning that soon they will begin to see how short life really is and how it is not to be wasted. People who seem perfect and they look like they have no floors'; they are the people who are suffering, like I was. But I found my savior in the most uncommon place. He was able to look through my mask, he saw the cracks, and tried to fix the broken girl that hid away deep inside the girl who only wanted to be seen as 'fine'. I slowly began to find comfort and safety in him, and I did the same to him. We were two broken people becoming whole. Someone once said when you pass, if you can count your true friends on one hand you are beyond lucky, and I even though I did not like the person that lay before me, I know that he once had true friends, including me. I'm a 17 year old girl who has suffered more than any other, beginning to believe that 'Hope' was just another word the people throw around. Until I fell in love with a badboy. Trailer to the side -------------------> Made By @Laura__1 Cover made by @Beautiful_Tragedy8 Copyright 2014