"Happy birthday, Callie!" Nick yells as he swings her around in his arms. Today is obviously Callie's fourth birthday and we are all so excited about it.
Callie has never had a proper birthday party, so I'm so excited to actually give her one. There won't be anyone at the party except for me and the boys, but I know she is super excited for it all.
"Are you ready for your party?" I ask her.
We all set everything up last night, so we can party all day today. I wanted to make today as special as I could make it.
"Yes!"
"Let's go downstairs," I say. She grabs onto me and Nick's hands and we walk down the stairs together. The boys follow behind us until we are downstairs.
Right as she sees everything she gets extremely excited. She smiles super big and looks around at everything.
In the living room there is streamers, balloons, happy birthday signs and confetti everywhere. In the corner there is food and cake. The other corner has all of her gifts. It really seems like she likes it which makes me super happy.
"Do you like it?" Nick asks.
"I love it!"
I smile, "I'm glad. Why don't you go start to open your gifts?"
"Okay!" She runs over to the table and the boys follow her to help. Nick and I stay back together and we watch everyone.
"Thank you for doing this," he says. "It really means a lot."
"Of course. I'm glad I got to help. It was really fun and not to mention, but she deserves it."
"She really does deserve it."
"Nick! Look! I got a Barbie!"
He looks over at her and smiles, "That's awesome. Now we have more barbies to play with. Who got you that?"
"Uncle Austin did!"
Nick and I start laughing and I look back up at him, "You should be proud."
"Of what?"
"For the way you have raised her. You are such a great role model to her and you should be proud of everything you have done so far."
"I guess so."
I shake my head and I kiss his cheek, "I know so." I walk away from him and I sit down on the couch to watch Callie open more of her gifts.
(Nick's pov)
As Alise walks away I instantly frown. What she just said should be true, but it isn't. I'm not proud of anything. I have felt like a disappointment my whole life and I still feel like that.
What is there to be proud of?
I haven't done anything special for anyone. I let my baby sister get beat and I let my mom die because of my own father.
There is nothing to be proud about.
***
It's been about twelve hours since Callie woke up to see her first ever birthday party. We have been doing stuff all day with her and she absolutely loves it all.
We have played games, barbies, and lots of fun. It's been a really good day and I'm glad that Callie has enjoyed it all.
"Time for bed," I say to Callie.
"One more episode," she complains.
"No," I say. "It's ten o'clock and it's time for you to get to bed. I know your are tired."
She grabs her blanket that she can't ever sleep without and she walks off to her room. I know she is mad, but she needs sleep or else she will be even grumpier tomorrow.
"I'll go tuck her in," Zion says. He gets off the couch and walks down the hallway to Callie's room.
I look at Alise as she starts to clean everything up. I don't know how she does it. I don't understand how she walks around the house so happy. I mean I'm so happy that she is happy. The only thing that girl deserves is happiness, but I wish I could be that way too.
But instead I'm over here still freaking out about my past. I can't ever get it out of my head and half the time I just want to die. I definitely don't think it's normal to think about killing yourself all the time, but it's something that is always on my mind.
"Ma," I say. "Why don't we all clean everything up tomorrow? I know that you are tired." I know she is tired and I am too. I want her cuddles now.
"Okay," she says. She puts some of the trash in the trash can and she walks over to me. I grab her hand and we walk to my room together. We usually sleep in my room when we are together. Alise claims that it smells like me and that's the only way she can sleep good.
"Today was good," I say.
She smiles and starts to get dressed into comfier clothes, "It really was. I think Callie had a lot of fun."
"I know she did."
I get dressed into shorts and then I lay down on my bed. Once Alise is done doing all her shit she comes over and lays down next to me. She lays her head on my chest and I wrap my arm around her.
She yawns, "It was fun, but I'm super tired now."
"Get some sleep," I say. I kiss the top of her head and she smiles.
"I love you," she mumbles into my chest.
"And I love you, ma."
[2:37 am]
I wake up to screaming coming from outside of my room. It sounds like it's coming from the kitchen or living room.
Usually Alise sleeps in my arms all through the night. She never moves, but she's not in my arms anymore. She is gone and not even in my room.
I quickly get out of bed and I walk out of my room. I walk to the kitchen to see Callie and Alise there. Both of them are tied up to the kitchen chairs and they are both crying. What the hell are they crying for? And why are they tied up?
I step farther around the corner to see him. The man I never wanted to see again. My father. He is standing there with a gun in his hand.
Very quickly I move back, so he can't see me. Why is he even here? How did he find us? And why does he have them tied up?
"I'm sure you guys know what's about to happen," he says. "You are either going to get shot or one of you goes with me."
"No," Alise yells. "Neither of us is going with your sick ass."
He starts laughing, "That was a bad mistake, miss Alise." How does he know her name? "I do as I want and it always happens."
"Well not this time," I say moving around the corner, so I'm completely exposed to my father now.
"Well, well, well. Look who it is. I was wondering when your pussy ass would come out to play."
I roll my eyes, "What the hell are you doing here?"
"I couldn't miss my baby's birthday," he says looking at Callie.
"You already missed it," I say. "Her birthday was yesterday."
"Well I couldn't get here right on time, but that's why I'm here. We are going to celebrate now."
"No," I say. "You aren't celebrating shit. I moved out, so I don't understand why you are here again."
"Well, son. You may be old enough to move out, but Callie here isn't. She is only three."
"Four now!" Callie yells.
"Sorry, she is only four," my dad says. "Which means she has to come back home with me."
"You aren't taking her."
"Or what? You'll call the police? You know damn well that you can't do that. Remember the last time someone didn't listen? Last time your mother got killed."
Tears start to well up in my eyes as I think about him saying that. I can't call the cops or he will kill my grandma. He has done it before and he will do it again.
He walks over to Callie and starts to untie her. "She is coming with me weather you like it or not."
"No!" I yell stepping closer to her and he instantly points his gun at me. "Take me!"
"No!" Alise cries.
"Or I could just take this beautiful gem," he says running his fingers through Alise's hair. Alise moves back, so he can't touch her.
"Get your hands off of her!" I yell.
He starts laughing, "I can tell that you really love this girl. Maybe taking her would harm you even more. I've always loved hurting you."
"No," I say. "Just take me, please."
"I'd rather not," he says. "I can't do much with you, but a young women?" He looks at Alise. "I can think of many things to do to her."
"Get away from her," I say stepping closer again, but he holds up his gun causing me to stop.
"I'll just take Callie for now," he says letting go of Alise's hair and picking Callie up. "I'll be back for this one though."
He starts to walk away from us with his gun pointed at me. I know that if I run after her then he will just shoot me. I can't do anything.
"Nick!" Callie yells. "Don't let him take me!"
"I'll get you out, baby! I promise!"
He slams the door and leaves the house with Callie in his arms. I can't believe I just let him take her. I'm the worst human ever.
I look over at Alise who has tears streaming down her face now. I quickly untie her from the chair and as soon as she is loose she grabs me and holds onto me so tightly as she continues to cry.
I start to rub her back and I kiss her head a few times, "I'm sorry, ma. I'm so sorry."