𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐆𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐖𝐢𝐟𝐞 || �...

Roseanne's POV.

"What are you doing?" Jungkook asks me.

I shrug because I honestly had no idea what I'm doing. I'm trying my damnedest to make the right decisions from here on out but I'm not sure what's right and what's wrong anymore. I'm not even sure what I want beyond Lisa.

What I want always seems to be in constant conflict with what's right. I was wrong for being unfaithful. I was wrong for falling for Lisa. I was wrong for walking out on Taejoon. How do I make the right decisions when what I want is wrong?

"I don't know Kookie." I say defeated, letting my shoulders rest against the wall. "Everything I've done recently has been wrong and I don't know how to make it right."

"Don't worry so much about what's right and wrong. Follow your heart. Listen to your gut."

"I have."

"Then what's the problem?"

"My family's going to judge me."

"How do you know that?"

"Because I judge myself."

"Who cares if they judge you? Everyone's entitled to their own opinion. You can't run from this."

"When have I ever ran?"

"You ran from Gyeonggi. You ran from Taejoon and now you're running from her." He says gesturing toward the door where Lisa was. "You love her, right? You ripped your life apart to be with her."

"I need time to think but she won't give me that."

"Have you asked her for time?"

"Yes, but she doesn't hear me."

"Make her hear you. She's a fighter and you're a runner."

I let that sink in.

"She's fighting for you and you're running away. She's suffocating you because she's afraid of losing you."

"How do you know that?"

"That's what she's been doing this entire time." I suddenly felt idiotic.

She's fighting and I'm running.

"Why are you running?" Jungkook asks brushing my hair out of my face.

"I feel guilty." I admitted "I'm so happy that I feel guilty. I destroyed the both of them. I don't deserve to be happy."

"Taejoon isn't a victim. He knew what was going on and he ignored it. That's his mistake and he's paying for it. He'll be fine." My vision blurred as tears filled my eyes. "Give me a hug."

"I love you so much." I tell him holding him too tight.

I felt so grateful to have Jungkook in my life. Every goddamn time he made sense of the clusterfuck that was my actions.

It was all starting to come together like the plot line of an incredible story. I've always worried about what everyone thought of me my father, my brother, Taejoon and ignoring what truly mattered. I love Lisa. I fought it with everything I had while she fought for me. Even though we were together I still fought because of the guilt. I don't deserve Taejoon or Lisa but I had them. I still have Lisa. Fighting her makes me feel less guilty but it's hurting her. I don't want to hurt the person I love anymore.

"I love you too. Be honest with her. Call me when you get back from Gyeonggi. We'll have a drink."

I nodded.

Wiping the tears from my face, I used my key card to open the door. I was met by Lisa who wore a somber expression. God she was so beautiful. I still couldn't fathom this woman wanting to be with me especially considering my behavior recently. She should be repulsed because I am.

"I'm sorry." I tell her.

"Why are you sorry?" She asks on an exhale.

"I'm sorry for hurting you. I'm sorry for being afraid of my feelings for you. I'm sorry for choosing him when I knew that you were the one." When she started to smile my heart slammed against my chest. "Jungkook tells me I'm a runner."

"I heard."

"You did?"

She nodded. "He didn't fight for you. That's a big part of what tore your marriage apart. You needed him to show you he cared and he didn't. I'm showing you that I'll never stop caring. I'll chase you to the ends of the earth."

"I love you so much because of that. You'll never understand how much I appreciate you fighting when I was too afraid to."

"I love you."

She wrapped her arms around me suffocating tight and I held on like a lifeline.

"I need to go to Gyeonggi alone." I expelled on an exhale. A little afraid of her reaction.

"I have to go to Los Angeles." Relief consumes me. I'm so glad she's not fighting me on this.

"How long will you be gone?"

"A day maybe two. What about you?

"With my family there's no telling." I laughed humorlessly.

"You've got to stop running and talk to me." She says holding my face in her large hands. "I know I act fucking crazy when it comes to you but I need you. We're a train wreck but we can work on it."

"I'll try."

"I like your friend. He's good for you."

"Me too."

"I have to remember to apologize."

"He knows your reaction wasn't about him."

"How long do we have before you leave?"

"I would like to get there before dark."

"Come here." She says gesturing toward the bed. I comply lying next to her. She wraps her arm around my middle keeping me close as we lay together. Our last few moments of peace before we part ways.

"Will you ever tell me why you left him for dead?" I don't have to say his name, we both know who I'm referring to.

"I already have."

"Not the details." I complain.

"Baby, please." She exhales as if talking about her past sucks all the life out of her. "I can't."

"You're never going tell me?"

"It's not important."

"If you won't talk to me, will you talk to someone else?"

"Someone like a shrink?

"You've been through so much. I applaud you for coming out of it stronger but you can't heal yourself with band aids. I wish I could save you but I can't. You need to talk to someone." It was probably a long shot asking her to talk to a therapist about her feelings but it was what she needed. What we needed to have a fresh start.

"Okay." She says simply.

"Okay?" I expected more of a fight.

"I promised you I would be better. I'll talk to someone."

"Thank you." I say turning to embrace her.

"My father will run a background check on you the second I tell him about us. Is there anything in your past I should know before he does?"

"Petty crimes I committed when I was a teenager and the other thing we talked about." I can tell by the change in her tone she's ashamed of her past. She shouldn't be. If it weren't for my father and brother who knows the trouble I would've gotten myself into. And I was privileged and spoiled. "How will you get to Gyeonggi?" She asks. I'm grateful for the subject change."

"Rent a car."

"What, no. I'll lend you my driver."

"How will you get around?"

"I'll figure it out."

"You don't have to."

"I want to."

"You're amazing." I say breathing her in. I'm going to miss her so much while I'm away. I wish I could take her with me but I feel like this is something I should do on my own. I can see myself hiding in her; cowering out of difficult situations like I always have.

"I want to show you the property. If you like it I can have your stuff moved in by the time you get back."

"What are you doing with two apartments in Seoul?"

"Real estate is a good investment. I thought of selling it awhile back but my lawyer said I'd be better off keeping it with the market in the shape that it's in."

I lay in Lisa's arms for several silent moments before we make our way uptown.

Lisa's vacant apartment was just as beautiful as the one she currently lived in. It reeked of a luxury and elegance I wasn't accustomed to. I couldn't afford a place this lavish if my salary was multiplied. It was a dream. Wall to ceiling glass windows, plush couches and filthy expensive furnishings. I nearly choked on a breath taking it all in.

"I can't live here." I say staring out into the city from the breathtaking rooftop view.

"You don't like it?" She pouted.

"It's gorgeous but I can't afford this." I say allowing my hand to revel in the feel of the pillow soft fabric of the couch.

"Shut up." She says. "You think I'd charge you to live in a place I own. You know me better than that."

"I'm not a freeloader."

"I have more money than I know what to do with. Let me do this for you. It's my fault you're in this situation in the first place. It's the very least I can do. I'll put it in writing, if that'll make you comfortable. I won't even stop by uninvited." I laughed lightly. I wouldn't let myself believe that for a second. She wouldn't be Lisa if she wasn't crossing lines and dominating my existence.

I was learning that she would make exceptions for me but I didn't want her to change.

"I'll stay if you promise to come visit me whenever you want. The dominating woman in the suit is the woman I fell in love with. I don't ever want you to change."

"I promise."

~

"You'll call me every day, right?" Lisa says lifting me up into her arms, cradling me like I weighed nothing.

"Every day." I whisper in her ear before I kiss her hard on the mouth.

"It's taking everything in me to tell you goodbye. If I didn't have business in L.A. you wouldn't be able to talk me out of coming with you."

"In that case, I'm glad you have business to tend to. I wouldn't want you to get chewed out by my father."

"I'm not afraid of your father."

"That's what they all said before my father showed them his massive weapon collection."

"They?"

I rolled my eyes. "I did date before I got married. They just weren't serious."

I see her teeth flexing beneath her jaw and I knot my hands in her hair, keeping her eyes on mine. I need her to hear me and know how serious I am. "You're sexy as hell when you're jealous but I don't ever want to see your jealousy again. You're it for me. There's no one else."

"I bet you thought the same about him once upon a time." I know when she says him she's referring to Taejoon. I hate that she still feels threatened by what I had with him. Whatever Taejoon and I had was demolished the first time Lisa touched me. I haven't felt the same about Taejoon since.

How could she not know that?

I shake my head. "Not even close. A part of me knew that Taejoon and I shouldn't have gotten married but I was rebelling against my father. What I feel for you can't compare to what I had with him. This is so right it scares the hell out of me. I've never been so happy. I have no doubts."

"None?" She questions and it breaks my heart.

"Look at me." I wait for her eyes to meet mine. "Not one." She pulls me into an airtight hug and then she locks her mouth with mine. She pries my mouth open wide stealing all that she can before we part. "I'll come back as soon as I can."

A man cleared his throat behind us and I pulled back. A much older man comes into view holding open the door to Lisa's car.

"Bogum, this is my girlfriend, Roseanne. I need you to take good care of her."

"You know you can trust me." He says to Lisa. Then he looks to me with a million dollar smile. "Nice to officially meet you."

"Likewise."

"Make it back here as soon as you can." Lisa whispers in my ear, pressing me into her chest with all the strength in her body. "I love you so fucking much," she says.

The strength of her speech breaks my heart. I could feel it through the pounding in her chest how much she loves me and it's something I never felt with Taejoon. The feeling is something I didn't know I needed but now that I feel it, I don't ever want to live without being loved irrevocably, unconditionally. I have no doubt in my mind that Lisa and I will last because there's no doubt.

I meant what I said to her. I broke so many promises to be with her because my heart knew before my mind that this dominating, passionate, bad ass girl was mine and I was hers.

~

a/n: only a couple chapters left. this is the end of the mass update! see you all in the next one! ending this part on a good note :)