Author notes: This is my first attempt writing YiZhan. English is not my first language, so please forgive my mistakes and awkward writing. This is NOT for profit. I don't own them. AU (as in Alternate Universe) and maybe OOC (as in Out of Character).
Author Notes 2: Thanks for the votes! Thank you for taking the time to read this. Thanks a lot for adding this story to your reading lists. Thanks for following my account. I'm humbled by your support.
Author Notes 3: The song is I want you now by Depeche Mode. NSFW, please wear headphones if you are not alone. This is a personal choice since this is one of my favorite songs from one of my two favorite bands in this world. I'm a huge DM fan.
Thanks to CALActorsTypist for editing this story.
Author Notes 4: Long chapter by my standards.
WARNING. PLEASE READ!
Nothing, really.
Chapter 24 I want you now
Once Zhan recovered from the surprise that Bo's request caused in him, they agreed to have dinner at Zhan's home. They exchanged their local cellphone numbers and Zhan gave Bo his address.
He asked Yu Bin to cancel his appointments for the rest of the day and went home. He told Mrs. Ling they would have a guest for dinner and asked her to cook some Chinese traditional dishes that he knew Bo loved.
He didn't need to ask to bring sunflowers to the apartment, since those flowers always decorated his home. They always succeeded in making him feel close to Bo.
He couldn't deny he was nervous. He remembered Yi Bo to be assertive, but now he had become a little aggressive. In a way, it would make it a little easier for Zhan. Yi Bo obviously knew what he wanted in life, so if he wanted Zhan they could solve all their issues in an easier way.
Zhan tried to read some documents from work while waiting for the appointed hour, but he found out that his thoughts came back to Yi Bo all the time. Anticipation was really making him anxious.
In his mind, he tried to find the right words to talk to Bo. How to explain that he had always loved him, that their separation had been heartbreaking for him too. That he never intended to hurt him, on the contrary he had wanted to protect him.
He hoped Bo would understand his reasoning. He had stupidly expected Bo to call him when he felt ready. But since that call never came, he had just assumed Bo had moved on. It had been so painful to realize that he had been a fool.
But should haves and would haves were not important anymore. He needed to think about the future. What he could offer Bo to convince him to stay by his side. Tired of thinking, he went to get ready for dinner.
On Bo's front, work related matters kept him busy most of the day. However, from time to time his mind would stray and he would find himself thinking about Zhan.
In the brief moment Zhan had held him in his arms, he finally felt peace. He hadn't had that feeling in a long time. There was always an underlying unrest following him everywhere. As if he were supposed to be in another place, at another time or with different people. He never could explain that feeling. That horrid sensation that he didn't belong.
But that was not the only feeling or sensation that Zhan's proximity had stirred in Bo. It had just been a brief moment, but sexual arousal had also been there. Zhan smelled magnificently like Bo remembered. His slender body and taller frame still caused havoc in Yi Bo's self-control. It was like they hadn't been apart for so long.
After Bo finished working, he went very quickly to his hotel. He took a shower and changed to go to Zhan's home. He had wanted to get rid of his suit all day. He still preferred informal clothes in his everyday living, but now, he had less and less opportunities to dress like that since his new responsibilities made him wear suits practically every day.
On his way to Zhan's place he stopped to buy a bottle of whiskey. He wasn't a connoisseur or anything. He just bought a bottle of Lagavulin and considered his mission accomplished. He had tried whiskey occasionally at dinners with the Stevensons. He enjoyed the warming heat it produced in this throat and in his stomach. Besides, he would not arrived to Zhan's place empty-handed.
He was a nervous wreck while riding the elevator towards Zhan's penthouse. How should he greet Zhan? Would he dare to hug him again? Why not? Friends hug each other all the time, right? He reflected a little on it and didn't remember the last time he had hugged Seungjoo, so not so much of a friend hugger.
He had acted impulsively. And now, he was afraid things would be awkward between the two of them. He was brooding over it when the elevator doors opened. Zhan's apartment door was across the corridor. All he had to do was walk a little and knock on the door. He found himself incapable of doing that. He was very scared!
The door opened before he could turn around and flee. Zhan had stood in front of Bo with a nervous smile on his face. He greeted Bo.
"Hi, Bo. I heard the sound of the elevator and came to see if you had arrived," he said to Bo as an explanation.
He didn't say to the younger man that he had been sitting in front of his security camera's monitor to see the exact moment Bo arrived. Yi Bo just nodded and walked towards Zhan.
This time, it was Zhan who reached out to Bo and hugged him. It was brief and somewhat cumbersome, but Bo relished at the moment.
"Please come in," Zhan said while braking their embrace.
Yi Bo followed Zhan inside the apartment. It was a huge place. It remind him a little of the New York apartment they had both lived in. Its size and distribution were similar. The decor was simpler, but very tasteful and very expensive looking.
Something caught Yi Bo's attention, around the place there were several flower vases holding sunflowers. He remembered then, he remembered everything. A bittersweet smile came to his face. He had to ask.
"Zhan, why did you buy sunflowers?"
"There are always sunflowers here," Zhan answered.
"Really?" Bo insisted, dubious.
"You can ask aunty Ling if you don't believe me. As matter of fact, give me a moment."
He left Yi Bo alone in the living room and went to what Bo supposed was the kitchen.
The woman recognized him immediately and went to hug him, smiling.
"Yi Bo, you are here!" She sounded very happy.
Yi Bo hugged her back, happy to see her again after six years. She had been very motherly towards him and not once he felt judged for being in that kind of a relationship with Zhan. He had always remembered her fondly. Zhan intervened.
"Aunty Ling, please tell Yi Bo that we always have sunflowers here. He doesn't believe me," he pouted after saying that.
"That's true Yi Bo," the woman said.
"Since when?" Asked Yi Bo, still unconvinced.
"Since we came back," she said in a quieter, more serious voice. She then tried to lighten the mood. "Enough talking, go ahead. Dinner is ready. It will get cold."
They went to the dining room and seated. Mrs. Ling served the dishes and made herself scarce. They started eating in silence. None of them dared to speak first although thousands of questions plagued their thoughts.
In the end, it was Zhan who overcame his nervousness and asked Yi Bo.
"How have you been, Yi Bo? How was Harvard?"
Yi Bo seemed surprised, he took his eyes from his dish, looked at Zhan, took a deep breath and answered.
"I've been okay, I guess. Harvard was...a lot of work."
"I can imagine," Zhan said, waiting for Bo to elaborate.
"Intellectually speaking, it was an exciting time. Professors are brilliant and I learned a lot. Eventually, I realized I enjoyed programming and that stuff, but I became more interested in management. That's why I stayed for a MBA."
"Did you enjoy your time there?"
"It was okay," he responded, noncommittal.
"Did you make friends there?"
"Not many. I think, just my roommate. I didn't have much time for socializing."
Zhan wanted to ask about a boyfriend, but he didn't have the courage to do that.
They continued eating in silence after that. Although everything was delicious, they didn't have that much of an appetite. Once it became obvious that they were done with dinner, Zhan invited Bo.
"Do you want to go to my office for that shot of whiskey?"
Yi Bo nodded and stood up. He followed Zhan and entered Zhan's office. Zhan offered him a seat in one of the two armchairs by the window. Bo sat and commented.
"The view you have here is breathtaking."
"Yeah, it is. This is my favorite place in the apartment," Zhan said while serving them a shot of whisky.
"Do you want ice?" Zhan asked.
"No, that's okay."
Zhan gave Yi Bo the drink and asked him.
"Should we make a toast?"
"To reunions," Yi Bo said.
"To reunions. Cheers," Zhan repeated. They clinked their glasses and drank.
"Do you like whiskey?" Zhan asked.
"Not really, I only drink it occasionally. Mainly when Jordan insists on it."
Zhan couldn't stopped himself, even if he had wanted to. He inquired.
"Who is Jordan?" He was feeling extremely agitated.
"Jordan is my boss' husband. They invite me to dinner at their home occasionally."
"Mn."
"What about you Zhan, how have you been?"
"I've been...okay."
"Do you...do you still have fake girlfriends?" Yi Bo asked, a visible effort in his voice.
"I didn't for two years after... I came back. Victoria has acted the part for four years now."
"That's a long time," Yi Bo commented.
"We became friends after a while."
"Oh, I see."
"Her real boyfriend is a nice guy," Zhan added.
"Why haven't you changed the actress?"
"I don't know. It's like staying in your comfort zone. In fact, we might get..."
"You might get what, Zhan?"
"She needs some help with legal matters, so we might pretend to be engaged."
Yi Bo finished his drink after hearing that. Zhan couldn't know what he was thinking. Yi Bo was really confused. He knew Zhan wouldn't marry her, but still it stung.
"That sounds serious, even for faking it. But I'm sure, you know what you're doing."
"The thing is, I might have not thought it through."
"I think you should, Zhan."
"I promise, I will."
"Do you... do you still believe... in not having...romantic relationships?" Yi Bo finally asked, hesitantly.
Zhan winced at the memory. He knew the effort it meant for Yi Bo to ask that. He swallowed hard and answered.
"No, I don't. I haven't thought that way for a while."
Bo looked surprised and scared. What did that mean? Did Zhan have a boyfriend? Was he too late?
"Do you... have one?"
"What?"
"A romantic relationship. Do you have a boyfriend or... a lover?"
Zhan blushed, unsure before answering.
"No, I don't."
Those words did it for Bo. A dam of emotions broke down. He felt elated. He looked at Zhan and wanted to kiss him. He wanted desperately to touch him.
So, Bo stood up and went to Zhan. He captured Zhan lips and started kissing him. Zhan stirred under his touch, but let him continue. Yi Bo sat on Zhan's lap, held Zhan by his nape and kissed him like there was no tomorrow. Zhan held Yi Bo by the waist and opened Yi Bo's mouth caressing Bo's tongue with his own.
Zhan couldn't resist the temptation and ran his fingers through Yi Bo's hair. It was a familiar gesture for both of them. In fact everything felt familiar and... perfect.
There had been years of yearning, wanting, missing each other. Zhan really wanted to get lost in the sensations, but was not sure that was wise at this moment.
Yi Bo felt like his body was on fire. He wanted Zhan, and he wanted him now. He needed him. Those six years without him had been too much. His body needed Zhan.
"Zhan...I want you to take me. I want you now," Yi Bo said and attacked Zhan's mouth again.
Zhan kissed him back, but he needed to breathe. He broke the kiss and said.
"Wait..."