As Noah drove me up to his house, I felt like a different person from the Riley I was earlier in the week. On Monday, I had felt too guilty to walk into Decker Lord's house as a guest with my phone recording everything. Now, I couldn't wait. I had stayed up late, unable to sleep because I kept reexamining every memory I had of Dad and Chloe, combing through for any looks of longing I had misinterpreted at the time, driving myself crazy. Before long, I couldn't tell what was real and what was just paranoia.
I hated the man who made me feel that way.
Noah pulled the Edison into the guest house garage, lead me up to his room, and had my pants around my ankles as soon as the door was closed. Afterward, when we were cleaning up for dinner in his ensuite bathroom, I was happy he had. I felt loose, relaxed, level-headed before I walked into Decker Lord's home a spy.
I was ready. Before we went up to the family home, I opened the WIA's app and hit "record."
And I didn't feel bad about it.
Mrs. Lord was in the kitchen, with the twins helping her make dinner.
"Hello, boys." She kissed Noah's cheek, and then mine, with no hesitation whatsoever. "Welcome, welcome! Noah, can you grab the baby? He's fussing."
Noah lifted his little brother out of his high chair and cuddled him. Ben cooed and grabbed Noah's nose, and I melted a little inside.
"How are you, Riley?" Mrs. Lord asked. "How's school going?"
I gave her the summary I was giving every adult who asked lately: school was fine, A/V club was great, I couldn't wait to graduate and take on the world. We talked about that for a while, until Decker walked in.
Daisy dropped the knife she was using to cut onions and ran into his arms. Ella joined him, and Ben reached in Decker's direction. Noah walked him closer, and Decker gathered up all his kids in his arms. He didn't seem to care about wrinkling his expensive suit.
"Riley!" he said once he'd snuggled them all and tousled Noah's hair. "How are you?"
"Good, good," I said.
"Dinner will be ready in about thirty minutes, Papa Bear," Mrs. Lord said. "Anything you want to do first, better do it right quick."
"Perfect," Decker said. "Riley, come—I want to show you my study."
I looked at Noah, who just raised his eyebrows.
I swallowed. "Sure."
Decker lead me down a maze of hallways, talking about all the art that we passed along the way.
"That's a Turton, from 1935," he said as we passed a Cubist painting. "And that's a da Vinci sketch. I beat Bill Gates in an auction for it."
The way he said all that wasn't really bragging—he was more like a kid showing me his favorite toys. He pointed out the stairway banisters carved by an Italian artisan, the crown moulding which came from a country house in France, and told me about the A.I. system he designed to regulate everything from security to heating to the window coverings. Its name was Chauncey.
"It also periodically interjects puns into the conversation," he said. "We do have fun, don't we, Chauncey?"
"You designed me so we would," a mellow male voice said, filling the room.
"Do all your A.I. systems have their own personalities?" I asked. "Like, is Chauncey different from Simone?"
"Ah, that's right—you've met Simone. You've ridden in Noah's car." He smiled. "Yes, they're quite distinct."
I wasn't sure how to read his tone of voice, but I was too stunned as the lights came up in the study. Soft, orange-y light played off the mahogany bookshelves that filled the room from floor to ceiling. Really, it was more of a library—high ceiling, high windows, long velvet curtains and books everywhere, as well as paintings, sculptures, and strange artifacts.
"When I create a home, I try to make it an amalgamation of past, present, and future," he said. "And above all, it should feel warm and full of laughter and love."
"I wouldn't have pictured your house looking like this," I admitted, studying a glass-encased bat skeleton on the bookcase. "I expected it to be all glass and stainless steel."
He looked around the room, a tiny fond smile lingering on his lips. "There's no humanity in that."
That seemed like the perfect entry point. My phone was recording everything, and he seemed to be traipsing right into the realm I wanted him in.
"You seem very interested in humanity," I said, sitting down in one of the leather armchairs.
"You're going to ask me about Temptr, aren't you?" He sat down across from me and crossed his long legs. He looked casual, relaxed.
"There's a lot I could ask you about."
"Noah's car?" He raised his eyebrows.
"Noah's car, sure. There are a lot of questions there."
With each response, I felt like I was clearing hurdles. So far, so good, but I didn't want to be on the defensive. I wanted to lead this conversation, but he wasn't letting me. Before I could try a new tactic, Decker Lord said something that thoroughly put me in my place.
"How is Cheryl Warren? At this point, I feel like I know her well enough to ask after her elderly mother. Oh, don't look so scared." He waved his hand. "You're just a kid—of course the intimidation game is going to sway you. I don't hold you at fault at all."
"How do you know about Ms. Warren?" I spluttered.
"The WIA thinks they're playing a high-level game of deception, but they're easier to predict than a chess champion—and if you think chess champions aren't predictable, you've got something to learn about the world. It's all about motive." He looked at me. "Don't worry. You're safe in my home no matter what, and I'll do whatever I can to keep you safe from the WIA. You're family, now."
"They're listening to this, you know," I said.
"No, they're not. I'm jamming your signal. Right now, dear Cheryl is leaning her head in, listening to us compare Bach and Wagner. She's extremely bored."
"How do you know that?" I asked.
"Because that's boring. Who would want to listen to that?"
"No, I mean, how do you know what she's listening to? How are you able to play a recording of us having that discussion?"
He spread his hands. "You're asking the wrong question."
I was about to bite my lip in frustration, but I thought, fuck it—why hold back?
"You're infuriating, you know that, right?"
Decker laughed, leaning his head back. His sharp chin jutted into the air. "Now you're getting it. I don't play by the rules, Riley. The rules just keep us in our boxes. I find that tedious. I think you do, too."
I shrugged.
"Remember, I've listened to your work," he said. "Not just The Real Love Show. I was a big fan of Letters to Intrepid II. You're interested in confronting the so-called natural order of things. So am I."
"You talk a good game, but what are you actually saying?"
He laughed again.
"Delightful! That's the perfect response." He paused to think, touching his index fingers to his temples. "You're right. Enough dancing. I know who you are. I know why you're here."
"Okay, then: who am I and why am I here?"
"You're Noah's match and you're here to see me suffer."
That was not what I expected.
"Why do you think that?" I asked slowly.
"Well, am I wrong about the first part?"
I shook my head.
"Right." He smiled. "As for the suffering, you can't deny that you walked into this house with no feelings of remorse for what you thought you were about to do—which was turn me in to the World Intelligence Agency and put me before the UN Security Council."
"I had a lot of back and forth... I don't want Noah or anyone else in your family to get hurt."
"Fair enough, but what I said still stands," he said. "You thought your entrance tonight was going to lead to my incarceration and the dismantling of my empire, and you had no remorse for that. Do you deny that?"
"I guess I can't."
"Wonderful. The truth is liberating, isn't it?"
I swallowed hard. "So what's the truth of all this?"
He stood and began pacing the room slowly, putting one foot in front of the other, fingers stroking his chin thoughtfully.
"Why don't you ask what you really want to ask me?"
"Is Temptr real?"
"You already know the answer. You knew it the moment you laid eyes on him."
"Yes, but how does Temptr know that?" I asked.
"Ah, 'how'... humans always get caught up in the 'how.' 'Why' is much more interesting."
"We can always move on to 'why' afterward," I said. "First, 'how.'"
He shrugged. "Temptr reads various pheromones and wavelengths. Think of them as strings, connecting each of us to another. That's the best way to picture it. The strings can reach around the world, but they never weaken."
"Okay... so why should people know about this? You know the effects Temptr has had on society. I don't have to tell you the current divorce rate. So why? Weren't things good enough before?"
He shrugged. "Were they?"
"Fuck you," I spat. "My mom and dad loved each other. Sure, maybe it wasn't a love for the ages, but they loved each other enough, and almost everyone breaking up now was in that same boat. How many kids are watching their perfectly fine family disintegrate because of some app?"
Decker Lord raised one eyebrow. "Go on."
"No relationship is perfect," I said. "But that doesn't mean there's nothing there. Maybe we don't all need blissful, predestined, fated love. Maybe the love that people choose is enough."
He nodded thoughtfully. When no answer seemed forthcoming, I opened my mouth again. Every thought that came to my mind was the perfect weapon to use against him.
"No one is better off knowing that Chloe and my dad are each other's match. Not me, not Mom, not Dad, and certainly not Chloe. You know what will happen to her if she follows her heart. She'll be that slut who took up with her ex-boyfriend's dad. And my dad will be that gross old man who left his wife for a barely-legal piece of ass, and Mom and I will just be a joke."
That little smile that had been haunting Decker Lord's face for a while began to truly bloom. I could barely contain my anger.
"You express yourself so well," he said. "Half of yourself, anyway."
I wanted to ask him what he meant by that, but I already knew. He had caught me out.
"I understand that there's pain," he said. "And not insignificant pain. I'm sorry for that. But, Riley, now that you know the truth, you can't tell me you would go back to ignorance. You can't tell me you would deny yourself the love of your life because of what other people will think."
"You're right," I said. "I wouldn't, but Noah and I are lucky. We had no collateral."
"No? None at all?"
Well... there was my reputation as a heterosexual male, which turned out not to be entirely accurate, anyway. Not much of a sacrifice. And Chloe and I were headed for a breakup, anyway. All I really gave up was Chloe's Riley. I still didn't know if that was a true loss or not.
I was scared it was. I still didn't really know who replaced him.
Decker Lord smiled, more tenderly than his harsh-angled face looked capable of.
"It's never worth it, to walk away from love for fear of what others will think," he said. "Life is too short to ignore one's heart. I know you wouldn't want your parents to live through the pain of ignoring theirs."
I shook my head.
"You're young," he said. "Whatever pain you feel now, it will pass. The universe is full of pain, but all of it is transitory. Trust me."
I nodded.
"Dinner will be ready soon. Let's return to the others, shall we?"
Walking out of that room, I felt sort of numb. Decker Lord's posture was unchanged—he walked straight and tall, shoulders back, head high. I couldn't shake the feeling that he was gloating over some victory. Had he won? Had I been beaten?
He had teased out all of my painful emotions and brought me to his side—was that really because we had had a heart-to-heart, or was it due to his skill at manipulation?
This bastard probably thought he had dug his claws into me. Well, he hadn't. And he shouldn't be so sure that his claws couldn't be dug out of everyone else.
"Decker," I blurted out in the hallway just before we entered the kitchen, which was alive with the noise of the kids.
He turned and raised his eyebrows.
"I, um... just wanted to ask you to chill out with Noah. He would never say anything, but I can tell it bothers him, the way you monitor him. He's almost an adult, you know?"
I regretted my power move as soon as it had left my lips. Decker Lord's eyes went... hard. All of the tenderness was gone. Now he was looking at me like I was prey. My smug smile slid right off and his returned, as if he had stolen it right off my face.
"Riley, when you have your own family, you can make your own decisions on how to run it," he said. "Until then, know your place."
I tried to steal my smile back, but Decker Lord turned his back and waltzed into the kitchen. The twins flocked to him. I drifted toward Noah, who sat at the breakfast bar.
"How'd it go?" he murmured.
I stood behind him and snaked an arm around his shoulders, pressing him into my chest. It made me feel better for one small moment.