There are some things in life you can never understand. One day someone can be a saint and forgive everyone... the day after a person would become a monster that everyone feared.
Looking up from my battered and bloody body, I got up from the floorboards and stood woozily. Spinning with the loss of blood and the many bruises left all over my body, I stared at the bed that stood before me... one that housed the one I feared the most... and one I loved the most.
Walking towards one of the legs that held the bed, I carefully pulled myself up the woollen ropes that had been tied since the day we fell together. Grunting as I finally pulled myself up unto the soft and fluffy mattress, I rested a bit to catch my breath. What was it that made me fall for him? I zoned out and before long; found myself walking down memory lane.
The first time I saw Marq, he was just like any other giant; all brute-sized and always grunting all the time. Just like the human beans that I've ever seen before, he ate, he worked and he lazed around at night... but that image of him quickly shattered when that day came.
Just as I had finished borrowing for the day, he barged in crying and bruised. He never ate dinner that day and I, being the ignorant person I was, ignored him so. The next day, I woke up to a loud WHAT!? Jumping out of my makeshift bed, I got dangerously close to the crack in the wall to peek at the commotion... and then he did the weirdest things.
He was shouting and screaming... at himself. He called himself a wimp and a loser who couldn't even fight to save his life. And then he did the unthinkable; he punched himself square in the face. I was horrified! I mean, who would even do such a thing to themselves?! I silently watched the supposed madman that I had being living under for years... what was he doing? Why did he do this?
Before I could think up of a possible answer to that question, he moved about and grabbed... a pen and piece of paper. Scribbling something furiously, he finally clicked the pen after finishing and through it at the wall; breaking it in the process. Then in a storm of rage, slammed the exit door right after he left.
Thoroughly curious and thirsting for an answer, I left the crack and walked up the noted that been left after his presence. It was, of course, a letter... to his other self. It took a few days to realise it... but he had something that humans called... what was it... ah; he had a split personality disorder.
He, being one of the luckier ones of any known cases, only had two personas inside his mind. They were both named and called Marq, but it was obviously not that simple. A side of him was always itching for a fight; immature and irresponsible, he had even joined several illegal gambling back alleys. But... the other side of him was a softy, a person who loved to read and work with infinite patience; being the only persona that could help the other persona, he had to work twice as hard to supply his and his other selfs' needs.
Marq... he had a terrible life, constantly running away from thugs he didn't steal from and misunderstood by friends he didn't make; that would soon stop seeing or talking to him. Both sides of them had struggled against each other, one was a outcast of society and another was a kind soul that genuinely wants to connect with his other half... if he would ever let himself do so.
Taking a huge risk, I went out to confront him one day on his kinder persona because it was, strangely enough, like clockwork. His meaner side would be out for a day, and the other would be present the day after before it all cycled back to the meaner persona. And of course, his reaction to me was completely expected: the usual "Am I dreaming right now?" and the "What are you?".
Still... something about him made me love him the way I did. Maybe it was out pity, or out of the loneliness and struggles he had. He was all alone against this losing battle, and I knew... that one day; he would succumb to it. Giving him someone that finally understood him, he cried. Being his emotional support borrower everyday, anyone would start to feel attached.
The days where his other side took over, he begged me to hide. I refused so, because in the end... I just wanted to help. His other persona on the other hand, wasn't so gentle. Looking at me with the eyes of the devil... he played with me, toyed with me and took out his anger on me. But... it all started to change, little by little-
"Oh my gods Irsha! What did he do this time!" Looking up from my legs, I stared into his turquoise eyes and smiled a little. "Nothing compared to what he did a month ago... liste-" Picking up from the bed, his eyes scanned every inch of me with a scrutinizing gaze. "You're so badly bruised! You look at a fresh plucked grape from the tree! Your body... smells like blood." Oh here we go.. "Marq, hold on! He didn-" "NO! You're being treated and that's final."
Hurriedly ripping the latch of the first-aid kit, he gingerly placed me unto a table while he took out a wire gauze and disinfectant before he noticed a note tucked to the side of the box. Pulling it out of the wedge, he read the words that had been inscribed unto it. Sighing a huge breath of relief, he looked back at me. "The smell of iron on you... that was my blood? I mean... his blood?"
Sighing at his adorable concern for me, I looked into his eyes before hugging a tip of his finger. "That's what I've been trying to say, he... punished himself for hurting me." Looking at me with bafflement, his eyes were wide open with confusion. "How... and why exactly did he do such a thing? Especially wit such... suddenness?" I broke away from his eyes and slumped down unto the palm of his hand. "We... talked. These bruises you see had already been here for a while."
"Irsha... you knew the risks of showing yourself to me... to the other me. Why? Why would you go such lengths to befriend him?" Smiling a saddened frown I pulled one of his fingers into a hug. "Because he's... well, a part of you. I mean, I was bound to die or live by his hand anyways." Picking me up, he gave me a solemn and gentle hug. "But... that's no excuse to endanger your existence... I don't... want to lose you Irsha." Smiling under a mask of calmness, I pushed away from his hug gently before staring into his soul. "But... you're the one I love... and he's just another you. I want to give the other Marq a chance, besides, you can't expect to leave you... right?"
"Irsha... that kindness will be the death of you one day." I think about his words while he sat down on a nearby sofa. "But it was the same kindness that brought us together, wasn't it?" Marq glances away from me; a tell-tale sign of the 'damn it I know it's kinda right but she has a point' thing.
"Yesterday... he seemed so...different. It was like a completely new persona so I panicked at first when he wasn't hunting me down and hurting me. I thought you have developed another persona at first but... when he finally found me scurrying on the floor... the first thing he did was apologise." Knitting his eyebrows together, Marq tried to make sense of the situation; which of course he wouldn't get it.
"He went on a rant about the... 'I'm not in control' thing and 'I would never do such a thing' act but in the end, he just... begged for forgiveness." Mouth agap and mind blown, the current Marq had just received a revelation. "You look so funny when that happens..." Snapping back to reality, he cleared his throat before gesturing a 'go-on' hand gesture.
"He wants you to forgive him, me included but mostly you... since you know; you had to support him and yourself at the same time while he made life a living hell for you." Rubbing his eyes, I wouldn't particularly blame him if my recount didn't make him question himself. "I... don't know what to say..."
"I'm ready to forgive him, but the real question is for you; will you accept him? Will you accept what's part of you and help him into your life?" Chuckling with a twisted smile, he strokes my back while I enjoyed his warmth. "I... guess this couldn't hurt. Then... tomorrow tell him that I forgave him, and... I'll accept him for what and who he is."
"And if you were wondering why I was sleeping on the ground, he was just scared to even touch me. Weird isn't it? He just suddenly became all self-conscious." ...
Silence carpets the room with an uneasy awkwardness, too awkward for my liking... okay... I think he's ready. "Marq?" Humming with response he lowers his gaze unto me. "Are you really, really, really going to accept your other self?"
"What do you mean? Of course I am."
"Then... let him take control over you now."... "Could you please repeat that?" Sighing from knowing that this would happen I stood up from his open palm and stared into him in the eyes. "If you really accept him, let go of your control over your body; let him, the other Marq, take over."
"And... how exactly can I do that?"
"Well... it's just as easy as it sounds. Literally just hand control of your body to him in your mind; let him... possess you, in a way." And of course he gives me the 'but what if?" look. "You promised that you'd trust him? So why not?" Clearly looking uncomfortable, he took three long deep breaths before exhaling and nodding his head.
Closing his eyes, he concentrated for a bit before his entire body relaxed. Pressing against my chest, I braced myself for impact if there was any that was going to come. 3...2...1...0 "Marq? Well... the other Marq, is... that you?" And as if he was voice-automated, he sprung to life quickly looking around before resting his eyes on me. "H-hey th-there...."
"Irsha... I trust that you've told him about our... agreement?" Nodding my head nervously, I have unconsciously reverted to a fear-laced organism that was staring at a apex predator. "Irsha... you..." Shaking uncontrollably, I closed me eyes and waited for the pain.... but it never came; instead in its' place, was a sensation of warmth and affection. "Ma-Marq?"
Pulling away from the brief hug, he looked down at me with his magnificent eyes. "Irsha... I've changed, please. You don't have anything to worry about anymore." Releasing the pent up fear and anxiety into the atmosphere, I melted into his touch... he was just so... warm and comforting now...
"I'm... so sorry about the many things I've done to you before, is there just anyway to re-" "Oh shut it... Marq. Accepting someone isn't like giving a price tag to people, it's a gift... and it was up to you to return it." Smiling with a look I never knew existed, he pulled me into another hug with infinitely conscious gentleness.
"Thank you for convincing him for me..."
"Hm? Oh, the other Marq... yeah he's the type of person that would forgive someone if that someone did something terrible before" Why... why does he feel so much like the same Marq I know and love now... why? "I'm sure the effort and bravery you've put up with the both of us has greatly fatigued you... please, rest."
"Thanks...... you've really changed, Marq." Smiling the brightest he's ever been, you'd mistake him for the kinder Marq... but now... they seemed to have morphed and combined into one. "I love you Marq... both of you." Giving a reassuring smile, he assured the sleep I very much needed by slowly stroking my back against his chest. "Sleep now, Irsha. You've done enough putting up with the both of us... we'll definitely pay you for what you've done. But that's for the future us to do. Now rest, you little warrior." Smiling in triumph, I rested my thoughts and slipped into the darkness... which for once, truly felt like a dream come true.
Annnnnnd cut! IT SUCKS TO BE ME! This story came about when I was lying on the bed thinking about stuff. It honestly ain't have bad but... eh, I can do better. Welp, I'll see you peeps in the weekend... hopefully. (Sleep is the honestly the only convenient ending I can give to a story, or a day I've spent playing Minecraft in.)
[19/3/2020]