I was now parked up in Adam's drive, the house was surrounded by trees, totally isolated but not in a creepy way where its screaming come in at your own risk, it looked welcoming. The front door was a dark grey, plain white nets hung in front of the windows, from the outside it looked lovely. A decent size aswell, looked at least a four bedroom If not more.
I took in a deep breath my vision now on myself in the rear view mirror making sure I looked a little decent, it didnt matter that on the inside i was a complete mess, a broken mess.
The memory of Calvin's cold hands wrapped around my delicate throat, trying to squeeze the life out of me. I was still in shock, he had become a monster, someone who swore to protect me, to love me, to always treat me as an equal. I could feel the ache of my heart pounding against my chest as it broke into small tiny pieces underneath my bruised ribcage.
It took every ounce of strength I had to get of the car and face Adam, the make up I was wearing covered up some of the marks but It was still noticeable. I hoped my babies didn't question my appearance, Dylan's getting older now I know I can't fool him as easily as I can with Layne, she still carries so much innocence around in her perfect little frame.
I drew in a sharp quick breath before knocking on the front door with my knuckles. My aching heart still managing to beat but at a much slower paste than it normally would. I blinked back the tears that was trying to escape from my puffy eyes.
Not now Millie, later.
I told myself over and over as I waited for Adam to open the door so I could hold my babies, they gave me more strength than they'd ever imagined. I needed them right now, I just needed to see there exquisite faces, my eyes had just witnessed Calvin try and destroy me physically and emotionally, they needed to block out the memory of Calvin's angry presence smothering me, the only way It could was too look at my children's angelic faces. A pure treat for my eyes.
I was cut short of my thoughs as Adam swung open his front door, his smile fell instantly as his now wide hazel eyes searched me up and down, he blinked a few times forming no words, it didn't help that the light from the hallway seem to bright up the outside of his house. I knew I looked so raw and open under his gaze, no amount of make up could hide that.
I quickly cleared my throat, chucking on the biggest smile I could form, trying to push the pain and heart break down to my core.
"Hey," my voice sounding a little wobbly.
Adam's Hazel eyes still watching me intensely, his Jaw clenched and his eyebrows drawn in together.
We carried on staring at one another, it felt like minutes had gone by but I'm pretty sure it was just seconds, my bright blue eyes trying to shield the pain and hurt I was feeling.
"Mummy!" Layne shouted before running up to me, my attention was pulled away from Adam and onto my baby girl. I could feel my face lit up instantly. God I missed her so much, I put my body weight onto my shin that was now laying against the floor, my arms out wide for her. Layne ran straight into my embrace, throwing her little arms around my neck. I bit down hard on my bottom lip so my cries of pain stayed in my throat. I held onto my daughter for the longest time, I breathed in her scent, her hair smelt of our blueberry shampoo. She was so perfect. I smiled against her bright blonde hair.
"Hey baby girl, I missed you." I whispered into her hair.
"I missed you too Mummy, but I had the best time!" She squealed,
"Good baby," my smile still staying strong and wide.
At least I knew the pain Calvin put me through wasn't for nothing.
I pulled away from Layne, I was now standing up. Layne ran back into he house, I looked back over at Adam who seemed to collect himself a little now, he showed me a tight smile. "You wanna come in?" He asked.
"Sure," I hopped inside closing the door behind me. Adam was still watching me, I felt exposed under his strong gaze, I needed to advert the attention off of me.
"How was they?" I darted my eyes around me taking in as much detail as possible. The walls were white, pictures on the walls of Lexie and Daniel which made me smile, he liked to be surrounded by his children, just like me.
"They was as good as gold, very polite, ate all there dinner and afters." I could feel Adam's eyes still on me, I didn't want to come across as nosey so I looked back him showing him a small nod and smile. " Thank you for having them."
"Would you like a cup of tea, or coffee perhaps?" His husky deep voice that I seemed to miss hearing floated around me, was that really a good idea? I mean it gave Calvin longer to get his stuff ready which meant I didn't have to see him again when we got home, but I felt fragile right now, I was upset I couldn't trust myself not to fall apart, he already caught me doing that once I didn't want the embarrassment of that happening again.
I could see the plead in his dark brown hazel eyes. I knew it was a bad idea deep down but I couldn't bring myself to tell him no. I liked being around him which is madness considering I hardly know him.
"Okay," Layne and Lexie were still in the living room playing, Dylan and Daniel were playing the playstation no doubt so it wouldn't hurt to stay an extra twenty minutes or so.
I followed Adam into the kitchen before taking seat at his breakfast bar. The kitchen was gorgeous, very spacious. Black tiles with white accessories, everything seemed to have a place and it look immaculate, he must have a cleaner surely, how did he keep ontop of it all, I felt like I needed to go home and scrub everything.
Adam stood by the kettle fixing our drinks together, I told him I'd like a coffee with one sugar and a splash of milk. He placed my hot cup in front of me, I showed him a smile as a thank you before cupping my hands around for cup.
"You have a beautiful home," I confessed there was a picture on his fridge that caugh my attention, it was of Adam, Lexie, Daniel and a lady who was beautiful she had bright red hair, deep blue eyes, she wore the widest smile on her face along with Adam as they stared at the camera. That must have been his wife although he didn't wear a wedding ring maybe she's no longer around. I wanted to ask where she is but that isn't any of my business, so I bit back that question.
"Thank you," He lent against the counter before taking a small sip of his hot beverage of coffee.
My gaze was now on my cup, seeing the stream clouding the warm air in front of me.
"Millie,"
"Mmm?" I kept my gaze on the coffee still afraid to look up at his face that was becoming hard to resist. God this was a mess. A bad fucking mess.
"Are you okay?" I could hear the concern in his voice.
"Yeah, I'm great." I could feel his eyes still boring into me, I needed to convince him.
I drew in a breath before holding up my head so we was eye level. "Honestly, I'm good," I said through a small smile.
"Is someone hurting you?"
No, not anymore.
I let out a small chuckle as if his question was ludicrous, if only he knew. "Of course not,"
"But your face" he stated, his voice sounding low and controlled.
"Oh, yeah," I pointed to my face before continuing "I smacked my eye onto the door- knob earlier, I was sorting out the washing and just slipped." I tried to sound as convincing as possible but I knew he didn't buy it, It was the lamest excuse going.
He raised an eyebrow before biting down on his bottom lip. "And the finger prints on your neck,"
Shit.
I could feel the panic begin to rush through my body. Fuck I didn't think to check my bloody neck in the car. Jesus christ.
"I...I..." I stuttered, not knowing what to say.
"The children mentioned there dad isn't around that much, is he the one doing this to you?" His jaw was clenched shut, his knuckles turning white as he threw his hands into fists against the counter.
I could feel the fear trying to escape so I quickly swallowed it down, "There father has to travel for erm... business trips, so no he isn't around that much, it was just a heated argument, it wont happen again." I was now blowing on my coffee trying to hurry the cooling down process on so I could gulp it down and leave.
"Huh," Adam's head cocked to the side, his hazel eyes still studying me.
I needed to change the subject, I was trying to forget what had just happened I didn't have the strength to do this right now with someone I hardly know.
A question came to mind so I placed the coffee back down on the counter before clearing my throat. " Parents evening is coming up soon, have you booked your slot yet?"
I had already done Layne and Daniel's the other week, Dylans was three thirty and Laynes was ten minutes after.
He shook his head before taking a big gulp of his coffee, he swollwed the liquid before pointing at me. " Thank you for reminding me, completely slipped my mind."
"No biggie, glad I could help." I gulped back as much coffee as my small mouth could handle as it was now the perfect temperature to drink, I placed the empty cut back down before standing.
"Well thank you again for having the children, Lexie and Daniel are more than welcome around mine."
I mentally face planted myself. How stupid of me, his just seen my neck and face, he knows I'm lying about my other half hurting me, why the fuck would he let his children over my house. If the tables were turned I'd tell my children to run in the other direction as fast as they could.
Way to go Millie.
Adam showed me a small smile. "Your welcome, like I said they was good, didn't even feel like I had four children in the house." He chuckled which made me show a wide toothy smile. I liked hearing him laugh, he should definitely do it more often.
We was now standing in the hall way, I called the children letting them know it was time to go, they both let out a little moan but continued to get there shoes and coats on which made me smile.
Dylan and Lexie thanked Adam before running off into the car which was unlocked. I spung around to face Adam, his chocolate eyes was already on me.
I pulled some loose strands of hair behind my ear, then looked up at him.
"I'll see you Monday," I murmured. I was about to leave but Adam caught me by the wrist, I stopped in my tracks before searching his gorgeous face, a puzzled expression showing on my flushed face.
"If you ever need anyone, call me Millie, day or night, I don't care. I don't know your situation and I may be stepping out of place here but.." he threw his free hand through his dark shiny hair letting a small sigh escape his plump lips, "A man who leaves a mark on his women isn't a man at all." I felt like he wanted to say more but he held back.
I swollowed back tears not wanting him to see me so weak and pathetic. "Thank you Adam, it's all a misunderstanding like I said, it wont happen again."
He showed me a small nod before letting go of my wrist, I missed his touch already, my wrist now felt bare without his warm fingers surrounding it.
"Well, you have my number, don't hesitate to call if you need too."
I wanted to cuddle him, to place a kiss onto his cheek and say thank you a thousand times but I knew that wasn't acceptable, we was still strangers. It just felt nice knowing I wasn't completely alone anymore.
"Oh and nice hair cut, suits you." I blushed instantly as those words left Adam's lips, he noticed. The man I've spent eleven bloody years with didn't even notice, I mean I didnt loose inches but the layers were something I've never had before so I did look a little different.
I thanked him again before jumping into the car, Adam carried on standing by the front door. I pulled out of the his drive before taking off down the road.
Dylan and Layne told me everything that happened while they was at Adam's house. Dylan said he seemed like a really good dad which made my heart full into my stomach. I wanted to tell him he had one of those too, but the truth was he use to have one of those. Calvin wasn't around for our son no more or our daughter for that matter. Heck he wasn't around period and that made my heart ache that little bit more as I was the one who made sure he stayed away for good this time.