I can hear an irritating sound of a monitor, the smell of various medicines, the soft mattress I am lying in right now. I also feel someone holding my hand. Where am I? I slowly opened my eyes.
White ceilings? I roamed my eyesight inside the room. I saw Hiro lying next to my bed holding my hand. In my left arm, there's this what seems like an IV drop. So the hospital huh?
Pero.. anong ginagawa ko dito?
"Hi--"
"You're awake?"
Hiro stood up para pindutin yung button na mag-a-alarm ata sa mga nurses parang intercom. I tried to get up but it was only then that I noticed something in my neck. I tried calling Hiro pero tulad kanina, impit na tunog lang ang lumabas sakin.
"Shh the damage around your neck affected your vocal cords"
Damage!?
What damage?
And as if there was a magic word, the events that happened before reoccurred.
I grabbed Hiro's arms and tried to make out the only words I need to know.
"Ma.....mama"
Hiro looked at me bago siya naupo sa tabi ko. Hinawakan niya ang magkabilang braso ko.
"Eris I'm sorry, Mommy Mika is.."
No
Please no
"She's gone. She didn't make it. Pagdating namin doon you were already unconscious and Ashimika was already dead"
I grabbed Hiro's arms tighter, I was shouting. Amidst the thing in my neck and the pain everytime I talk, I shouted at the top of my lungs. It was painful but nothing can top the pain I'm feeling inside right now.
My mom's dead.
She shouldn't die but now she's dead.
That was not supposed to happen.
"Eris calm down, NURSE"
I was still shouting nang may mga nurse at doctor na dumating at tinurukan ako ng parang serum na pampatulog because I was slowly losing my consciousness again.
I saw mom.
The smile she showed me the first time we met. The way she laughed at my attitude. When she asked me if I wanted to be her daughter. That time when everyone laughed at her sa school. When she congratulated me for having friends.
All of those times that she hugged me and kissed the top of my head. Those moments where she'd whisper how much she loves me. They were playing like a broken record inside my head.
I lost my mom. She's gone, I never got the chance to hug her for one last time.
Now all I can do is cry.
****
"Eris don't worry the doctor said you can now talk freely."
"Where is she?"
Hiro stopped cutting the apples in the bedside table. It has been a week already.
"Your grandparents took her"
My brows furrowed and I decided to stand up from my bed.
"Eris where are you going"
"They don't have any rights to take her"
Lalabas na sana ako ng hawakan ako ni Hiro sa braso. He then made me look at him.
"Yes they do"
"No Hiro, alam mo ba kung pano nila trinato si Mommy? They called her trash."
"Eris listen, you're underage and sa legal documents they're still her parents. We can't do anything"
"Hiro I don't wanna argue"
"AT SA TINGIN MO GUSTO KO?"
I was taken aback, that was the first and only time that he raised his voice. He stared at me before putting his head on top of mine.
"Sorry pagod lang ako"
I know.. For a week siya lang ang nagbabantay sa akin and everytime I wake up, tantrums ko ang sumasalubong sa kanya kasi gusto kong lumabas.
"Hiro, I'm not as reckless as you think"
"Yes you are"
I moved away from him and saw him staring at me with those tired eyes of his.
"I need to see her Hiro, she's my mom"
Finally, he let out a sigh before grabbing his jacket.
"Put this on, ipagdadrive kita"
I smiled at him before putting on the jacket
"Thank you"
On the way I couldn't stop fidgeting, sa hindi maipaliwanag na dahilan hindi ako mapakali. Hiro didn't say anything but I can feel his side glances, he's anxious too.
To be honest I don't know what I'll do or what I should feel pagdating doon. For a week, the only thing that I did was cry and cry, I couldn't accept the fact that my mom left me.
"I need you to promise Eris"
I looked at Hiro as soon as he stopped the car.
"Promise you wouldn't let your emotions slip away, that you'll listen to them first"
"I..."
Can I? I stared at Hiro and nodded, he smiled at me before taking off my seatbelt.
"Go, I'll park the car"
Nagmamadali akong lumabas ng sasakyan at patakbong pumasok, I was appalled there were so many unfamiliar faces inside, I searched for a familiar face pero wala sila Mamu sa loob. I immediately saw her parents inside but that was beyond my concern. The casket inside, I slowly walked towards it.
I couldn't hold it any longer, my tears burst out as soon as I saw her face. Eyes closed while wearing that pretty white dress.
"Ma.."
I heard my own voice crack, I bit my lower lips and I held her casket. I was lost for words, I couldn't even bear to stare at her sleeping there peacefully.
"Anong ginagawa mo dito?"
I turned around and saw her mother glaring at me.
"Wala kang karapatan dito, if it weren't for you hindi siya mamamatay"
"Mama died dahil sa ex-husband niya, bakit sakin niyo sinisisi"
I received a slap for merely talking back at Mom's father.
"Ganyan ba pagpapalaki ni Mika sayo? Wala talagang modo, baka gusto mo na ding sumunod sa kanya sa pagpopokpok?"
I was about to talk back when Hiro's fist landed at the old man's face.
"How dare you"
"No, how dare you. Di niyo alam kung gaano kamahal ni Tita Mika si Eris"
"Mahal? Hindi marunong magmahal ang isang pokpok. Her husband was willing to take her back kung hindi niya lang nalaman na may inampon siyang isang walang modo na bata"
I stared at him disgustingly. Up until the end, wala siyang ibang ginawa kundi maliitin si mama.
"Take her back? HE KILLED HER, ANONG KLASE KANG MAGULANG PARA SABIHIN YAN SA ANAK NINYO? MY MOTHER WAS THE MOST LOVING PERSON NO THE ONLY LOVING PERSON IN THIS WORLD. TINANGGAP NIYA AKO KAHIT DI NIYA AKO KADUGO, SHE LOVED ME KAHIT HINDI AKO SA KANYA NANGGALING. Pero alam ninyo, I'm thankful na hindi siya nagmana sa inyo"
"ABA WALA KA TALAGANG MODO NA BATA KA! UMALIS KA DITO WALA KANG LUGAR DITO"
"KAYO ANG MAGSIALIS"
We looked at the door and there was Mamu, Shiori, Taki and everyone else. A few police officers were there too. Mamu held a couple of papers in the air.
"These are legal documents that states Eris is Ashimika's only daughter and the only person who can inherit all of her assets. Meron din dito na documents about how you tried selling her at a young age."
I looked at the old couple there stunned and didn't even dared move.
"Child trafficking ang kaso ninyo, if you don't want to be handcuffed then leave with the police officers quietly and PARTY IS OVER MAGSILAYAS KAYONG LAHAT DITO, HAVE SOME SHAME WILL YOU PATAY NA YUNG TAO PINAGPYEPYESTAHAN NIYO PA DIN"
"Mamu"
He looked my way and smiled apologetically.
"Sorry we're late, I couldn't save Mika until the end so I atleast wanted to save you"
I cried and thanked him, I looked at the old couple as the crowd begun to disperse without a single hint of remorse they went with the officers and it was just us that was left. I faced mom again.
"Ma... why did you have to be so beautiful"
My fingers traced the cold linings of the coffin. I wanted to hold her. I wanted to hug her.
I felt a tap on my shoulder before I turned around and was welcomed by the warm embrace of Hiro.
I held on his shoulders and cried my heart out.
"I'm here Eris. We're all here. You still have us, whatever happens, I'm here"
I couldn't utter a single word of gratitude to him because all I could feel right now was my heart breaking into a thousand pieces.
"Sobrang daya Hiro. I wanted more time with her, I wanted to still be with her. She's my mom Hiro"
Hiro caressed my hair and hugged me tighter. His warmth enveloping my physique and as his hush went quieter so we're my cries.
This wasn't a dream.
I lost the only person who had accepted me.
The person who gave me a new beginning.
I lost my mom.
And I could never bring her back.