I'm here laying in bed in the middle of the night going out of my mind just thinking about Mark, how I want him right next to me, even just for one night, one night of pure pleasure, where our bodies become one. Its a cold rainy night, I watch the rain droplets run down my window, the sound of the rain falling on the roof calms me down and eventually puts me back to sleep... In the morning I'm craving Mark's voice, I need to hear it, I call him but no answer
'Kate, don't call randomly, I was with my wife, she asked who called. Had to say it was work' But its late there, normally he doesn't mind when I call him
'Sorry, what time is it there?'
'Just after 1 am'
'Okay, what you up to?'
'I can't really talk soz'
'Fine'
'Okay I'll be honest with you since you are with me, I was in the middle of having sex' Ummm like I wanted to know that!!!
'Okay....'
'Soz that was a bit much wasn't it?'
'I will talk to you later' I still can't believe he told me that!!
~~~
The whole day I have been disturbed, just picturing him having sex, I can't get that image out of my head. Today I listened to my new CD and cleaned the house. Mum should be happy with me. Josh crosses my mind and I decide to message him
'Hey cuteness'
'Yo babe'
'How are you?'
'Loney tbh'
'Whyyy? xoxo'
'Just miss having someone next to me'
'Oh me too, me too'
'We are both lonely people then'
'Yah'
'I really wish I could meet you, hold you close to me'
'Ditto babe'
'You make me a happy lad, also very horny'
'Ha! you do the same to me too'
'Good' We continue to chat until he gets tired and goes to bed. James comes to my mind, I want to meet up with him again, sex was so good with him, I need another round.
Throughout the day I have been keeping an eye on Mark, he has been online for long periods of time and once I messaged him, he went offline. What the fuck is his problem? Why is he ignoring me? Have I done something? I'm already missing him badly.
~~~
This whole week he has given me the silent treatment, actually worse, just saying hi to me. I hope his alright, now he has me worried. Or maybe his just living his life as he should, not talking to a stupid online girl, he probably doesn't even care for me and here I am driving myself crazy about him. Why did this happen? Why did I catch feelings, I really didn't want too. I should of ended it in the beginning, when there wasn't much feelings. When I could of bounced back a little better. I snap myself out of these thoughts and come back to earth. Harry is on my lap and I cuddle him
"Come on, get up" I say to Harry, he gets off and I stand up. I walk over to his basket of toys and grab his favourite ball. I throw it for him and watch him run with excitement. I chase after him but I can't catch him. I walk over to Claire's rabbit, okay his still alive, good! I take a peek at my rooster, his fine too...I go back inside the house and get ready for the night, a movie and some microwave popcorn sounds good to me.