"Lily, we will have our guests tonight. You need to prepare yourself." Shout mom from downstair and I hissed in annoyance.
"No. I am busy mom. I have exam tomorrow." I reasoned shouting back from my room and I could heard foot step. It must be mom. Ready to explode.
"Since when you care at the exam huh? Just make sure you will behave well okay." Mom said looking at me who's laying lazily on my back. "Marco is important for me."
"More than me?" I asked and looking at her back.
"Don't be ridiculous." She chuckled and start to walk and sat beside me. "You are my one and only, Lily."
"Then why cant you just break up with your boyfriend because mom, every man are the same. They will hurt you again. And I must do it again." I spoke and she looks at me sadly. Feeling sorry. And I don't need it. I just want her to stay single forever. Just her and me.
No man, no cry.
"Darling, I can assure you that he is a good man. He will be a good father for you, he too has a daughter. You will have sister baby. You always want sister right?" She caressing my hair and kissing my forehead. "I am sorry that I make you did that, I really want you to have another man as father but I cant bring myself to hate the wedding with him."
"Why?" I pout.
"Because I can have you." She spoke again make my heart aches.
"No mom. Its better for me to not be born on this world rather than you being abused." I took her hand and kiss her hand.
"Its not important now. What in the past let it in the past, lets have the brighter future." I nod and smiling at her. I can't be more happy to have such a mother like her. "But now, be ready because Marco will arrive in an hour."
Can I take my words back?
--
"Hi." I look up from my phone and see the girl that man bring to my house smiling at me? Who the hell allowing her to entering my room?
But her eyes full of hope make me melting. So I shrug it off and nod at her.
"Can I sit here?" She pointed at the sofa beside me. I nod again and began to type again.
"Lily, you don't like my father right?" And I stops playing with my phone, looking at the innocent black hair girl beside me.
"Yes." I cant lie.
"Why? My father is a good man. The best father in the world."
"My father was a good man too."
"Really? You must be sad that you have to lost him." SHE looks so sad and touching MY hand carefully which is strangely calming MY heart.
"Not really." I responded and took my hand back, playing hard to get. Maybe his father use Yuqi as a bait for me to give my blessing for their said married. "He is a bad man."
And there Yuqi only look at me, not really know the meaning of my words. She was too innocent. And we are just 14.
"Then its a good thing that he died." I almost chuckled listening to Yuqi's word. "So you will have a better father like mine."
"He better do good to my mom. Or else he will taste what father had."
"What?"
"I kill him." I used to people to look at me in fear after I told them my story. They will laugh groggily find nothing to say and just leave, and never comeback. So I expecting Yuqi to do the same.
"Why?" And her question make me look at her. People usually stay quite and then leave, judging as hard as they can and then leaving me. Its the first time someone really asking me why did she do that.
"He hurts mom."
"I'll protect mom if you let my father marrying your mom." I chuckled again listening on how innocent Yuqi is. She is a good person. She wasn't easy to judge but want to hear the explanation first.
I nods. And Yuqi smiles.
Its not only because of her promise, but also because mom. Mom looks happy, her eyes telling me so. Even if I only 14, the hard life already teach me enough. Even thought I had the idea of Marco beats mom, but I cant bring myself to be an obstacle for her happiness.
And even I don't like Marco, yet. I like Yuqi. I trust her.
--
"Lisa, we will move after your graduation." I stop my giggling with Yuqi when I heard my mom saying it.
Yuqi and her father always cone to have dinner with us. And it should be a wedding for mom and Marco after my graduation. But she just said that we will move.
"Where?"
"Seoul."
"Where is it?" She mumbled innocently and Yuqi claps her hand excitedly looking at Lisa.
"Its our house, Lily. Even thought there are cold, but I think you'll like it." Told Yuqi with her puppy eyes and she sigh.
"I will stay."
"Why?" Lily whins and she cant take it any longer, she should be strict.
"I am not ready." Her lame reason. The real reason was, moving to Seoul and her mom will hold her wedding meaning that they will live with Marco. And she doesn't want to see her mother to live with a man. Afraid that she must see her mother to be beaten up to death again.
And she hates to kill people again.
Of course, the therapist said that its okay to kill her father, its for self defense. But for her, killing is killing. It still taking someone life.
"When will you be ready then?" Mom ask with a concern in her face. She knows once I said I stay, I'll stay.
"After high school graduation, maybe?" I hesitantly said more to Yuqi who's now look so sad. "Hey don't be sad, I promise I'll go with you in the uni, we can share room and shopping and playing and watching movies and everything good." She sat up and reaching for Yuqi who is now tearing.
Is it funny right that they only meet for few months and Yuqi already so close with her more than anyone. She stole her heart easily, the affection she felt make her forget about her fear to have a new father.
Because Yuqi promise me to take care mom.
--
"Hi." Said Rosé awkwardly when she come to her faculty building along with Jisoo because Jisoo said she needs to give something important to Rosé.
"Hi." She answered back emotionless. She looks at Jisoo then male the girl conscious.
"Ah yes, I almost forget hahaha.." she laugh fakery. "I am here to gave you this." She hand something to Rosé. "And for Jennie. I wonder where is she." She asked Rosé.
"Ah she is currently at the class, right before library." She pointed and Jisoo quickly walk make the two girl stand awkwardly. Some people passing them whole whispering, almost know what's the thing they talk about.
It wont be far from triangle love story of Rosé, Jungkook and Lisa.
Funny that they make their own story, guessing what happening between the three without trying to confirm it.
"Should we go there to?" Rosé asked earning nod from Lisa and they walk slowly. Rosé really wanted to apologize, but she know that Lisa wont ever give it to her.
Because no matter she tried to not, in the end she always run to Jungkook. He is so strong, the only strong person that she found capable to gave her safety.
They almost there, only one class room left when suddenly they heard loud banging from there. Startled both Lisa and Rosé they remain silence when they heard a female voice. So angry and emotional.
"Don't you know you look so pathetic head over heels for a woman who act like you are nothing?"
Lisa looks at Rosé if she want to go on, walking toward the next class where Jennie and Jisoo are. But the said girl look at here back while shaking her head. She does really want to know others stuff.
"You said I am too good for you, that you don't want to break me. But lets do it, love me and I will make you the happiest man on this world."
There is no sound for awhile and Lisa bites her lips. Should they overheard someone's stuff.
"I love you, Jungkook. If someone like Yaegi cant make your eyes open, nor that Roséanne Park can make your heart move, I, this nerd that never asking you twice for your love because I know that I cant have you because I cant make you happy. But what's happening to you because of that nun is unforgivable. Look at me, I am here. I love you. Isn't that enough?"
"We need to go, Rosé!" Said Lisa but the red head stay still. So stubborn.
"You wont understand." He chuckled. "You wont understand how complicated my feeling for her, for Lisa. I feel everything about her and she cant be replaced."
Her breaths hitched.
"I love Lisa, and will always be like that."
--
That morning, Lilies lay there too. I took it anyway, I put it inside the vase. Its beautiful.
I love you, Doll.
•your JK
And for the next morning, and the another next morning until snow coming. The graduation will come very soon. So does my life.
I will restart my life once I leave. No more pain, no more regret, no more expectation, no more sadness, no more love, no more feeling.
No more, JK.
She will start to be bad girl, banging so many interesting man out there in the club. One night stand every Friday night.
Yay!
But why she doesn't want it to be happen?