i'm back w/ a good ass chapter. even though i still feel like shit i felt like writing another chapter, and then i got really into it and wrote 3 more yikes. the next few chapters are gonna be hella long.
Three Days Later
It all happened so fast.
The whole group was currently waiting at Gate 11 at the airport.
Three days ago, when the boys who had gone out came home, they had announced we'd be flying to California.
Jay and I had just finished talking about Mason.
That day was hectic- first the Mason thing, then California?
I was born in California, so it wasn't too exciting for me. I had only moved to New Zealand because I needed to get away from 'toxic relationships.'
We were flying into the area where I grew up. I was honestly nervous I'd see someone I knew from years ago. Then again, everyone might look different and much older, since I moved here when I was 16. However, it's only been three years.
Sitting on the seat, I thought about everything I went through back then. I must have a certain expression on my face, because John, who was sitting next to me, asked "Hey, (Y//N), you ok?"
I glanced at him. "Oh, uh... ya. Fine."
"You don't seem fine," I heard Jay argue, who was sitting to my left.
"(Y//N)? Is this about... you know..?"
The voice belonged to Jaren. He and Cameron were the only two people who knew about my past in California. I was uncomfortable telling anyone else.
"About what?" Mason piped in with interest.
"She probably doesn't want to talk about it," Cam growled through his teeth.
"No, no. They can know." I sighed.
After a pause, I continued. "So as all of you should know, I was born in California. But a lot of you- well most of you- don't know why I moved here."
"There was a reason?" Eric (swagger) questioned.
I nodded. "My experience through middle school and through my first two or three years in high school was awful. I was constantly getting cyber bullied and had little friends. But eventually, I found a boy, who actually cared for me-" I cut off and muttered, "-or so I thought..."
Some of the boys glanced at each other.
Continuing, I looked up from my shoes. "We became close, and he made me feel happy for once. He made me feel like I was important. We started dating, and I was actually felt good about myself. Then I found out..."
I almost broke down in tears. It was always hard talking about this. Jaren, who was sitting across from me and gave a sympathetic look. He smiled with encouragement to push through the pain of talking about it. I looked over to Cameron, who was also grinning.
I inhaled and exhaled quickly to recover. "I found out he was talking bad about me to his friends and other people. He told rumors that hurt me, and even my few friends turned against me. As if that wasn't enough, I found him cheating on me with one of my ex-friends.
"I closed myself off from everyone, including my parents. I went into a dangerous state of depression, and ended up trying to kill myself three times. Obviously, none of the attempts worked, but I was hospitalized.
"My parents decided I needed a fresh start. Most families just move out of state, but they decided to move out of the country. I was homeschooled the rest of high school, and when I turned 18 they moved to Florida. I was alone for awhile." I paused, embarrassed to notice that all the boys were staring directly as me with sympathy. "God... sorry that was... a lot."
I noticed Jaren and Cam smiling at me.
"So you're afraid you might meet someone you knew?" Eric asked out of nowhere.
I nodded.
I glanced at Mason. He had a sad but caring look in his eyes. I looked away quickly, embarrassed that our eyes met.
⎨ ☆ ⎬
The plane had finally taken off. I was seated on the outside of the seats. Mason was to my left, while Jay was at the window. To the right of me, in the other set of seats, was Cameron, Jaren, then Ezra at the window. John, Toby, and Eric were behind them.
When I had first sat down next to Mason, Jaren and Cam kept wiggling their eyebrows up and down, teasing me about it. I only glared at them and turned away.
The flight was 13 hours. This would go on for awhile.
I felt my phone buzz. It was a text from Mason. I looked to my left at him, confused as to why he was texting me. He glanced down, motioning me to read it.
Mason
hey, r u mad at me
or something?
I glanced at him, confused. I then began typing.
no? why do you ask?
i just feel like you've
been avoiding me
i'm sorry :( i'm not
trying to.
i feel like we've lost
our bond, y'know?
ya, i know what u
mean.
was it because of
that night?
...
oh god it was that
night. i'm so sorry
if u didn't want
me to do what i
did.
no, it wasn't
that night.
I suddenly felt a few gazes burning into me. I glanced over to the guys who were sitting at the right. They were staring at me, some smirking.
What do they know?
Suddenly, they all glanced down at their phones at once. My eyebrow rose, and then I had a realization. I looked over to Jay.
He'd been looking at Mason's phone and texting the guys what we were talking about!
Another text came through from Mason.
(y//n), did i do
something else?
I sighed.
u said that night meant
nothing.
did u want it to mean
something?
mason...
i thought u didn't want
it to mean anything.
(y//n), it did mean
something to me. i
like you. i was scared
u just wanted to be
friends. (y//n) u mean
the world to me.
Did Mason really just confess his feelings for me over text? I almost laughed, but I also felt my face heating up.
mason... i like u too
Another text came through. It was from John.
john : JUST FUCK
ALREADY
I was in a group chat with all the guys, except Mason.
wtf guys?
jay : ya'll are in
love~ uwu
ew, never do
that face again
jaren : god, i knew
i was right
cam : hey we were
both right
ezra : uwu
toby : uwu
stfu pls.
jay : uwu
cam : uwu
john : uwu
omfg i hate all
of u
I shut off my phone in frustration, turning to the right to glare at them.
Suddenly, I felt my eyes go heavy. Damn, I was tired. I fought with myself not to go to sleep, but my eyes shut anyway.
MASON'S POV
Mason suddenly felt weight on his right shoulder. It was (Y//N)'s head.
She's asleep.
His face grew hot as he realized the other guys were all smirking at him. Mason flipped them all off and laid his head back, also falling asleep.
⎨ ☆ ⎬
YOUR POV
An hour after we landed, we were now driving in a rental mini-van that barely fit all of us. Some of us were sharing seats.
I was staring out the window, taking in the old memories of this town.
Then, my heart skipped a beat.
We passed my old high school.
I started having a panic attack. I was short on breath and felt dizzy. As I was gasping for air, Jaren, who was sitting on my left grabbed a hold of my shoulders. He was saying something, but I couldn't hear anything. My vision was going blurry, as if I was about to faint. Cameron, who was driving, pulled over. All eyes were on me now.
Suddenly, I gained a little more strength
and I started to hear the voices again.
"-what's happening. Answer me!" Jaren yowled in agony.
"I'm- I'm ok now..."
"What the hell was that?" Eric asked.
"It was a panic attack," Jaren explained.
"Damn, I thought she was having a seizure or some shit," Ezra said from the back of the car. Next to him was Mason. Mason had a very scared expression on his face.
I looked down. "I'm sorry... it's just... we passed my old high school... and I freaked out."
"Hey, hey, it's fine," Jaren soothed me. "Oh, by the way, do you know any good places to get some food around here?" He was obviously trying to take my mind off it.
I thought for a moment, staring down at my hands which were still shaking.
"Oh!" I began, looking back up. "There's a Ruby's just up ahead."
(if u don't know what ruby's is it's like a burger and milkshake place. there's a lot in california and it's also a good place to go to with friends, so that's why i chose it)
"Ruby's?" a couple of the boys said in unison.
"Ya, they have really good milkshakes, trust me."
⎨ ☆ ⎬
We were at one of the larger tables, eating whatever food we ordered. We talked and laughed. It's as if my panic attack never happened, which is for the best.
Where I'm sitting at the table, I'm facing the entrance. As I'm talking to John, I notice someone walk in. I freeze. I know John's talking to me, but my ears start ringing. My eyes are wide and I start having trouble breathing again.
I begin to have flashes back to every time I tried killing myself.
I notice everyone look at me and turn in the direction I'm staring.
"J-Jaren it's-" I stammer out, even though I can barely hear myself. "It-It's him- m-m-my ex, J-Jake..."
I can hear Jaren mumbling to me, but I can't make out what he's saying.
Jake is with other people, some I recognize from school, others I don't.
Then, our eyes meet.
I felt my eyes tearing up.
Then, everything went dark.
this was long but i felt like it should be since i was on a break for a bit. anyways hope u enjoyed this chapter i'm actually proud of it. another chapter tomorrow!