Mujhy apny zabt pay naaz tha,Sar e Bazm raat yeh kya hua...
Meri ankh kesy chalak gai,mujhy ranj hai yeh bura hua...
Meri Zindagi kay chiragh ka yeh mizaj koi naya nahin...
Abhi rosni..abhi teergi..na jala hua na boojha hua...
Mujhy jo bhi dushman e jan mila,wohi pukhta kar jafa mila..
Na kisi ki Zarb ghalat pari..na kisi ka teer khata hua...
Mujhy kyun na Samjh saky yeh khud apny dil hi sa pouchiye..
Meri dastan e hayat ka to wark wark hai khula hua...
🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇🍇
Anisa's prov:
Days are passing quickly..and i have nothing to do..even the arrangments of engagement also started..!!
Ami forbid me to go to university for this week..so that i can take part in engagement preparations..like this is not enough.. like all that is happening is just according to my wish..!!
During these days many times ayla..aima..nighat..Sabahat and even Ali tried to talk to me but i ignored them each time..i don't want their fake sympathy..care or love...!!
Whatever..!!
As each day passed..i feel myself near the verge of breaking....!!
I have no one beside me..who listen to me..those whom i consider my family and friends they all betrayed me..!!
They all are happy on this engagement and even participating in the praparation..
They forced me many times to go out with them...
Even one day on Ami's persistence i went with them for the shopping but the constantly following eyes of Asfand and the smile on everyone faces..crushed my heart more..!!
They all found it amousing..??
And on top of that the constant mocking eyes of their mother's...made me so frustrated that i left the shopping without taking anything..!!!
From that day i locked myself in my room..i don't want to see them..i don't want to talk to them..
They all are selfish..!!
I am in the corridor near the living room when once again ami came to me to told me to go with asfand for the selection of engagement dress..!!
"I don't want to go..!!!
I don't want to go anywhere ami..and with that person never.."
"Can't you all see i hate him..!!
I can't able to stand him for even a minute..
How can i do this marriage..tell me..!!
Please look at me for once..he doesn't love me ami..it's just your misunderstanding.."
"Alright..then why is he marring you"..??
"Hhheee..he is doing this marriage for destroying my life completely...
He is doing this for his mother..
He is doing this for hurting me.."
"No anie he is doing this because he loves you..!!"
He doesn't love me Ami..!!
Or even for a minute i assume that he actually love me..so..what ami..??
He is the son of that woman who hate us both to the core of her heart..
How can she ever let me be happy with him..??
"This marriage only bring destruction with itself..!!!
Destruction for me ,for you..or may be for this whole house.."
"Beta listen to me..and try to understand..one day every thing is going to be fine..I myself seen love in his eyes for you..anisa...!!
You know each and everything for you..for the engagement he selected himself..!!
He..you..you don't know beta..he changed..he loves you..!!
He will always be with you..!!!
And listen one day..you yourself told me..this is best decesion i ever took for you..
Beta you just keep patience..he himself will laid earth on your feet..!!
And about his mother..!!
Bhabhi(maheen) also accept you one day wholeheartedly..because you are the happiness of his beloved Son..!!
I am your mother Anie i know..what is best for you..look at me anie..and listen..stop crying"..!!
"Please ami i will die..but not able to spent my life like this..hoping that one day every thing goes fine..and i have no patience..and this is just your illusion that she ever became good to me.. or accept me..!!
Can't you able to understand her fully in these long years..or are you putting too much hopes in Asfand..
He is not..what he is showing you..!!!
He is also the son of that woman..
How can he be less poisonous than her..??
"Please ami..save me..save from Him..
I don't wanna marry him..!!
If once i did this engagement he will never going to leave me..Ami..
He himself threatened me..!!
You know how much stubborn he is..stop this engagement...please for me"..!!
I cried once again while holding her hands...Now i don't need anyone beside me..except my ami..if she is with me..then i can handle every situation..!!
She is my support..she is my life line..
"Beleive me Ami..he will kill me..he only know how to get what he wants.....he is self obsessed..selfish..and self conceited person..he destroyed me along with himself"..!!
I don't know for how long..i cried while holding ami..i came in senses when ami..remove her hands from my hold..!!
"Enough..Anisa..just stop..!!
Tomorrow is your engagement..!!
I don't want to listen any absurd thing from your mouth now"..!!
After that she leave me..!!!
Today the first time in my life i understand what is the real meaning of loss...defeat..lonliness..!!
The real meaning of pain..
The defination of hurt..
Everything which i kept dear to my heart is sliping from my hands like sand..just because of that one person...!!
I cleared my eyes and move towards my room...
My hand is on the door's handle..when i feel someone presence besides me..lifting my eyes the person who came in my view made me feel suffocated...
The stony expressions on his face made me realise..he heared my conversation..!!
He heared my bright thoughts about him or his mother..??
If not all may be some part of it....!!!
"Why are you mourning like this..??
Ohhh may be becoz of the rejection of your demands..??
Or on our engagement..???
Or may be on the betrayal of your lover..??
Huhh..tell me.."!!!
Lover..?? betrayal..??
What rubbish he is thinking..!!
The fact is that..neither i ever think about him(arsalan)...nor i ever wish for his companionship...he is not even my proper friend....so in love with him is just out of the league..he is just a way to get rid of you asfand..but you don't need to know this..!!!
His question also made me releif that he didn't listen anything at all...!!
So Instead of answering him i made my way towadrs the door when once again his voice halt me in my steps..
"I am ready to forgive you anie.. whatever you do till today..but remember this anie from now onwards i don't allow you to think about any other person except me..
You are becoming mine..so now onwards you belong to me..Only me..
You are only allowed to love me and only think about me..
Tomarrow on our engagement you are going to be ready for me..to become mine..to wore the ring of my name
After that your every thing only belong to me..your thoughts..your heart,your mind,your body,your soul..your each and everthing...you yourself completely relate to me..Understand"..!!
"No...i don't understand even a bit and not have any intentions of understanding either...so what would you do..Huhhh...??
Tell me..what would you do..you will kill..huhhh ok then kill me..or threatened me again.."
"And you are absolutely right i am thinking about him..and will think about him only"
"What would you do..you think this engagement will change everything..i am going to accept this relationship..??
The answer is no..a mere ring is not able to bound me with you..
I am not yours and never will..."
I don't know why...i said that all..but the furstration of the whole week came out in the form of this outbrust..!!
And the crude expressions on his face gave me so much happiness....i felt releif and calmness seeping into me..
So it's proved now..that if i am not happy then i will not let him enjoy his victory too...
He doesn't know how much they all made me bitter with their cruelty..
So if i am going to be burn in this fire than i will make him burn too with myself..!!
I turned but before i took another step away from him..he hold my elbow in his grip and shook me hard...and with the other hand he clenched my jaw..!!
I try to wriggle myself out from his grip but he don't even budge a little..!!
His eyes held fire..fire of destruction..!!
This is the first time in my life that i see him so much angry..no angry is a small word he is infurated...his eyes are spitting fire..at that time i realized i shouldn't said this infront of him.. may be i went too far this time..!!
I winced.. unable to prevent myself from whimphering out loud..but it doesn't effect him a bit..!!
His eyes continue boring holes in me....he griped my hairs and drag me towards himself and this made me crashed with his chest..!!
His close proximity made me terrified for the first time in my life...!!
I don't know what he would do if sabahat didn't came with ali at that time...!!
They both freed me from him..!!
"Bhai (brother) leave her..what are you doing..??
Bhai plzz leave anie..."Sabahat put a hand on his shoulder..to relax him..!!
"NEVER..I am not leaving her"..!!!
A single word from his mouth made a shiver run down my spine..!!
His mouth is spitting fire just like his eyes..!!
"Leave anie..go to your room...."
Ali told me..with pleading eyes while holding asfand who is now clenching his jaw just like his hands..!!
I quickly left the room..my heart is thundering in my rib cage..!!
If before this i am frightened then now i am petrified from him..!!!
I don't know now what is he going to do..but he will not stop on this..he will surely do something..and that thing made me more terrified..!!
I wait..wait and wait but as day proceed nothing happened.. no one came in my room..not even ami..!!
I spent the whole night on the edge of my bed..!!
Today is the day of our engagement..it finally came..despite of my all the efforts..!!
Ami came in my room with the food..!!
But her face is devoid of any emotion..which give me any kind of hint of what is going on...!!
Hours passed i thought of taking a bath to relax my nerves..i am combing my hair when aima came in my room with the engagement dress along with ami..!!
"Wear it anisa..the beautican is coming in a while"..!!
I wore the dress..silently..not knowing what else to do..!!
After aima left..ami took my hand in his hold..and i hug her tightly..!!
"Anie..i don't know what happened yesterday but asfand raised a storm in the whole house..
He demand that he want the Nikkah to be done today not the engagement..
My heart stoped..and breath struck in my throat..!!
Every one try to relax him..but he didn't listen even your taya also tried but he didn't budge from his demand..!!
So after thinking about it bhai decided that there is no harm if today your Nikkah can be done to him..!!
If not today but than any other day we need to do the marriage so why not today...!!
I know Anie you are not ready beta..but beleive me we only do Nikkah today....not ruksati ..we will do ruksati acording to your wish..after completing your studies..!!
Beta plzz..guest came..After some time molvi sahab will come to you..
Please save our reputation..please do this Nikkah ..
Plzz beta made up your mind..!!
"I am leaving you alone so that you can prepare yourself for the Nikkah..and beleive me this is the first and last time i am asking you for anything..after that each and everything happened just like you want..but plzz beta..just today listen to me..plzz anie"..??
"Ok ami...give me some time..to prepare myself....and plzz don't let anyone disturb me for an hour..after that i am ready to do..what you whant..plzz..!!
she kissed my forhead and smiled wholeheartedly..she hugged me one more time and leave after patting my cheeks lovingly..!!
A whimpered esscape from my lips..no.. this can't be possible how can he do this to me..??
He is going to take avenge of my words and behaviour by marrying me like this..!!
I am not even able to handle this egagment thing then how can i gona handle this Nikkah..??
If i did this Nikkah my ways of getting rid of this family..from him...all gone to be vain..!!!
My whole life..is going to destroy..
No ami..not this time..i am not going to do this..not even for you..
For the first time i am going to take my life decision according to my choice..according to what i want..
I am sorry ami but i am selfish..i tried each and every appropriate way to get rid of this mess..but no..nothing goes according to me..!!
Ami you think that after this Nikkah i am going to be free..there you are wrong..if i did this Nikkah then i am going to be caged for my entire life..
A person who made me dance on his tunes without having any rights on me..how can he freed me from himself and allow me to do what i want..after he got full right's on me..!!
This Nikkah only encaged me with him..with his family..with all the sorrows..
I never wanted to do this but see i have no choice left..!!
I took a note from my side draw and wrote a note for ami..I now my decision is going to hurt her deeply..but it's still better than seeing me my whole life crying..!!
I placed the note on the side table..under the lamp...!!
I quickly change my clothes..and took a big shawl from my cupboard along with a hand bag..i emtied it's content on the bed and put my all savings in it..
I covered myself with the shawl..so that no one able to recognise me..actually this is Nighat's shawl...which i am going to used to hide myself..!!
I know that now the house is full of guests at this time..and it's not easy..!!
Period..it's the most difficult task..my life depend on it..!!
I can't use the main gate thats why i am going to use the back door..on the ground floor..near the store room..!!
Plzzz Allah help me..!!
I carefully opened my room door....and hurriedly dashed towards the stairs..
My hands are sweating..my heart is beating fastly..
I am at the last step of stairs when i hear ali's voice from upstairs.!!
It made me stop on my track..!!
"Aima..nighat..ayla..where are you all..plzz anyone help me..stich this button yar..plzz anyone listen"..!!
A releif sigh left from my lips..he is not calling me..he is talking with himeself..!!
I hurried my pace as i reach the back door..i felt releif washed over me...!!
I opened the door..the back door leds to a small street..so asusally no one is present there..!!
I felt happiness seeping in the every cell of my body..!!
When i took another step..A hand place above my hand on the lock of the door..i moved my eyes and seeing the person i felt my self shivering...i try to release my hand even knowing i can't be able to...and the exact next moment i am in the store room with that person...!!
I know this is the end..end of my attempt..end of everything..!!!
He is not going to leave me..not this time..!!
_________________________________________
Assalam u Alaikum friends..!!
How are you all??
And how's the chapter...??
I know it's late..but as you all know..i am hell busy in my life nowadays but i still try to update just for all of you..!!
Do like..comment and share and remember me in your prayers..!!
Till then
Allah Hafiz