Mess
I feel like the right thing is to go away, to not get punishment, but I can't hold it. I have to it.
So I punch her nose, blood is slowly going down her face "I never killed someone in my whole life. Don't you ever dare to try me again because I won't hesitate to do that again. And you know that I'm not the violent type" I head to the door and goes to my free world. Every time that I'm so mad I go to the roof. To clear my head from bad thoughts. From here I can see everything. The kids that shirk classes, the milk car that brings milk every Monday. All of those things calm me, even if I have no idea why. Step by step. Two kids are going behind me, and I guess that those kids are Nash and Mali. "Wow you almost killed her back there ha?" he's asking "I didn't think that she has the guts to make me angrier. Regretfully I was the one that found out that she has it" I say "Don't be angry, her brain went to coffee break" he sits next to me "Where's Mali? You came alone?" "No, she would be here in one minute. If we already talking about her... does she has boyfriend?" He asks, he looks down like fact that he asked this embarrassed him "No one touched her since she got here, so I guess that the answer is no" he breath heavily.
"Hmm, Sky..." she looks at me "Right! I'll go to take something very unnecessary so you two can speak alone" Nash chuckle. I headed far as I can from them. Nash is getting closer to Mal; his hand lays easily on hers. She holds his head in her hands and pulls him closer until they are kissing. And I am watching every moment of this telenovela. I think about what could happen if was saying to her no. Once I had Nash, now I haven't. But I can't regret on things that already done. I walk to my room, slowly, chin up, only because I lose in this fight, but I can't look like a loser.
Down, under the sleeve of my shirt, on my wrist, my tattoo. All over my body I have 2 tattoos, on the fingers, and soon, near my heart. I sit down on my bed, between my hands I have my guitar, the guitar that my mother bought to me when I was 2 years old. A few days before she got murdered. I like to play sometimes, I mostly playing when I'm board, or when I feel sad, it helps, to do something, just not to think.
My feeling saying to me to do a new tattoo, I head to the boys rooms. I lived inside those walls all of my life, what means that I couldn't see the world not like others. But Jordan did, he said that the world outside isn't the best, there's murders, death, you need to pay on everything and to pay a lot, he also said that it'll be better if I'll stay here. He was outside for a lot of time. I was out once, to do my tattoos at his family place because his uncle doing tattoos. From what I saw it was nice, but I did them three years ago. I knock on his door "Hey! What have brought you to my room? New tattoo?" he asks, I nod.
"He is doing tattoos! Come on! What do you care? It'll be okay, I would get Marian confirmation, my promise" he says. I think that he's right, I love his tattoos and I won't be care if that would hurt, life's hurting. He is holding my hand; I walk right next to him. "Is it very far?" he looks at me "You're 16, behave like one" I look down to the ground. "It's not that far. I'm sorry Sky... do you forgive me?" "Of course!" he smiles. I sit down the green chair. The light is blinding me "This is my uncle Tom! He is amazing at doing tattoos" he smiles at me, Jordan's smile is always calming me down. He holds the machine very close to my wrist "I'm afraid" I whisper in Jordan's ear "Don't be, I'm here with you, and no one will get close to you, not long as I'm here" I smile and his eyes shine. Two tattoos in one time "You're hero" his uncle tells me "Thanks" "Because you're Jordan's girlfriend you don't have to pay" he says, I look on Jordan, he nods.
Memories of my good days with Jordan. I was his girlfriend, until last year. This fight blew up our friendship. This is a bad memory that took me a long time to forget, but I know that I have to be careful with Jordan, because someday, this fight might explode in front of my eyes. Since then, I didn't have any new tattoos. But last year, when Jordan decided to learn how to do tattoo, and that means that he can do to me tattoo! Problem solved.
I sit next to him, he's looking into my eyes and smile "Every time I get amazed by your amazing eye color" "Jordan my eye color is black, what so beautiful in that sad color?" "I don't know, but I can see other colors" "What do you mean?" I ask, he scratches his chin "It's mixed with green and brown. And that's awesome" I smile and turn my head. He is smiling to me "Why you're so much happy?" "I don't know" I feel the pain when the needle comes in touch with my skin. "If you don't look it'll be less scary" he said it to me in my first tattoo, and I have listened to him "Why that tattoo?" he asks "A moon?" he nods "I always loved the night, and that's the best way to remember it" I scared, not because of the tattoo, I scared that someday, I would fight with Jordan and he will say what I said when we fought before two years."Jordan" I say "What?" "Why... I mean, I'm sorry" "For what?" he smiles "For what I said two years ago" he looks surprised that I remind it "It happened, you can't change it, part of me disappeared and it won't come back, but it happened" he says "I was mad, and I don't justify it" "So don't try to. I finished" he say I wake up fast and head to the door "Thanks" I say, and walk away. In the 1st floor we have a library; I used to walk with Jordan to there, but, since the fight I walk alone. I walk straight to there, until Nash crash me "Ouch" I whisper, he walked into my tattoo "I'm so sorry, have I crashed you so hard?" "No, it hurts from other reasons" "What are those reasons?" "I can't tell. Not now" "When I would know?"He is asking "Soon" I say and leave him there. I forgot how much I love to read! I sit on the couch, I used to read a lot, till' my last birthday, when my dad got murdered. My family extinct, I don't have anyone but my grandmother in London. Since my mother death she moved, I haven't met her, I don't even have any memories from her, all I know that her name is Alice. "Hey" mal sitting next to me "Where have you been?" I smile "I know this face! You have new tattoo?" I nod "I know you so good. Anyways you can't believe what happened on the roof" she says "Nash kissed you" Mali is raising her eyebrows "How do you know? Are you god" "I saw you guys, and no, I'm not god" we both smile "Skyler, I don't want to be mean, but I have to. I don't want you to be close to Nash like you been before. Is it clear?" I nod. I look at her back when she walks, why she thought that I will be the same with him now that my best friend is his girlfriend?
"Skyler!" Brooke is yelling "Shhh!" the librarian says "Sorry" she says back. Before a year she was the new girl, so I helped her to fit in. She is nice, in school she's the smartest girl, and in the real life she's not that smart. "Hey natural disaster!" She chuckle "Why she's so mad at me?" she asks "Let's think. You're in a library, and you've yelled, I'm pretty sure that she wanted you to shut up" "Ohhh, now I understand" see? That's what I talked about. "What you want?" I look at her "I don't remember" she say, my face gets red "What do you read?" I throw the book "What?" "Never mind, I understood the clue. I came to say that there are new boys" "Really?" I ask, and she nods. "What are them names?" "They are twins" she say "That's not answering my question" "Them names are Liam and Tom" "If his brother Tom was called Dylan it was sounding much better" I say "Yeah, but they both cute" some boy comes into the library "Look to there" she point with her finger at him "This is Tom" she say. "You were right, they really cute" "But you only saw Tom" "If they are twins I guess that his brother looks like him" "The funny thing that they look very different" "Okay" I say.
Brooke waking up and leave me alone, I look at him, I really want to know how his brother looks like, and more interesting, why they're here... he turn and look at me, he leaves the shelf and gets closer "Hey, I saw that you talked to that girl" he looks at her "Yeah" "She just investigate me out there" he smiles and his hand on his nape "I'm so sorry in her name if she said something stupid" he laugh "She said a lot from this. Is someone sitting here?" "No, have a sit" I say.
"I guess that you already know my name since you talked to her" I laugh "You are right. My name is Skyler" "Cool name Skyler" he smiles "I'll meet you later, I need to search my guide" "I can help you!" he looks down "Okay" he wakes up, and I go behind him "Who is your guide?" I look at him, he opens a letter "Some boy, Nash Downtown, do you know him?" "What a coincidence" "So you do know him" I nod "I'll take you to his room" I walk next to him, he is tall, with a very beautiful smile and a shy smile "So... why you know Nash?" "I was his guide on his first day here. We became good friends fast, and what happened, happened" "So he is your boyfriend?" he asks, I chuckle "No, actually, he is my best friend boyfriend" "Oh, complicated" he say "That's it!" he smile "Thanks, for helping me finding him" Jordan walk in the corridor "No problem, I anyways needed to find someone, and here he is" I look at Jordan "Bye Tom, I guess that I'll see you later. Do you want to sit with me and with my friends at dinner? Bring your brother!" "I would like to. See ya!" he knocks the door.
"Jordan!" I yell at him, he lifts his look from the ground, and now he is looking at me "We need to talk" I say and he nods. On the roof there are two kids, Jordan and I. The evening is getting closer, and so does the food "I'm sorry, I shouldn't fight with you, I just afraid that in some fight you would bring that up" "I won't after all, we are best friend till' death" he smile "We're good?" I ask "We're good" I smiles "Who was with you before a few minutes?" "Tom. Brooke just told me about the new boys, Liam and Tom. I talked with Tom and he's very nice" "Skyler and Tom sitting on a tree..." he sings "Shut up! He's a good friend, not my new boyfriend" "Is he?" I blush. "What about you? No nice girls" "No, most of them just... just..." "Not good?" he nods "You'll find her!" I say "Her? Well, I wish that HER will come faster, because I'm not getting younger" I laugh, Jordan always know how to make me laugh.
I laugh "What's so funny in it?" "It's just so funny" I laugh and he starts to laugh with me. "Do you think that we'll forget those days someday?" he asks "No, I won't forget you"
I bet he forgot.