<Keira's POV>
"There's nothing in here," I call, setting the dusty Latin text down on the table.
That was...my third book today, I think. I've sort of lost track, since we've all been up for hours reading through ancient books for anymore information on this 'mother of all'. Mother of all headaches, if you ask me, I think as I swallow the rest of my whiskey and make my way to the kitchen for some water.
I really shouldn't be drinking so much, but the numbing effect is helping me focus, strangely enough, and it keeps all the memories from attacking my mind. However, it seems that it doesn't supress all the memories, because I can apparently read several languages that I couldn't before.
Bobby went out on a supply run and promised to get me some vodka. As I'm going through the fridge for a bottle of water to balance out my alchohol intake, I hear someone come into the kitchen.
"Sam?" I ask.
"It's me Keira," he says, and I relax.
I'm always on edge now, naturally. I'm just waiting for Crowely to show up and kidnap me again-even though we have a deal.
"Having any luck?" I ask, forcing myself to be casual as I straighten up.
Sam shakes his head, looking frustrated.
"I'm sure we'll get a break soon," he says, then, "Keira...what's going on?"
I give him a wierd look, not sure what he's talking about.
"Um...you mean other than the Mother of All not even Cas knows what and we can't find anything to stop her with when she'd apparently about to rise?"
He's silent for a second, then nods, making a little face.
"Yeah, other than that."
I raise an eyebrow.
"Okay...I give up. What's going on other than the apparent end of the world-again?"
He stares me in the eyes as he answers.
"You've been acting differently lately. I know this thing with Crowely's had you shaken up...but you've been acting strange."
My heart beat kicks up and I swallow, hoping I haven't already given myself away. From the look on Sam's face, I have.
"Keira," he says, an undercurrent of warning in his voice, "what's wrong? What happened?"
I shake my head.
"Nothing," I lie.
From the look on his face, he's seeing right through it.
In a second, his expression changes from accusing to open and understanding. He moves forward two steps-that's all he need to cover the distance between, he's got long legs-and takes my arm, his grip firm but not painful.
"Keira, you can tell me. Whatever it is, you can say."
I shake my head. I can't tell him. Crowely promised me that if I told anyone, he'd kill Sam and Dean with me watching. I can't let that happen. I just can't. I won't be responsible for the death of the guy I love. No chance.
"I can't," I say softly, "just let it go. Nothing's wrong."
Then I turn on my heel and go out into the living room, where Dean is, hoping Sam will let it drop now that we aren't in privacy. Dean glances up as I enter and gives me a two second smile of acknowledgement before finishing up whatever he'd been reading.
"Find anything?" he asks, throwing back the rest of his whiskey.
I shake my head.
"No. You?"
He echoes my answer. Then he leans forward and looks at me for a long moment. Too long to be normal.
"Uh...Dean?" I say.
"You look like someone just kicked your puppy. Are you okay?"
I nod, averting my eyes from his. If Sam saw through my lie, then Dean definitely will. Jesus, I live with two lie detectors!
"Good enough for me," he says, clapping his hands together, "I say we all take a break. I'm gonna see if Bobby has any more beers stashed around here."
Confused, I watch as he walks off to go searching for more alcohol. I shake my head slightly. Dean and his beer. And then I remember that I drank a lot of whiskey today too, so I have no grounds to judge.
"I'm going outside to get some air," I call and head for the front door.
Now that I'm outside, I have no idea why I came out here. I don't know the car lot the way the others do, and it's not even as if I have the mechanic skills to fix up one of the cars to help me think. So I just walk around, staring at the sky and wondering what the hell I'm gonna do.
"Keira," someone says.
It doesn't surprise me though, I could sense him coming.
"Balthazar," I reply, kicking a rock without looking up, "what do you need my blood for this time?"
He snorts.
"I don't need your blood. In fact, I didn't want to come here in the first place, but your best friend threatened to rip my wings off if I didn't come talk to you."
"You?" I ask in surprise, looking up at him.
He's dressed impeccably, as usual, standing with his arms crossed over his chest. There's a wicked looking dagger in a sheath at his belt, and I'm sure another at his back.
"Yes," he says dryly, "I was as surprised as you are. However, I know Kristena, and I know for a fact that she won't let me back into Heaven until I talk to you."
I make a face. That's so like Kristena, I think with a little smile.
"What does she want us to talk about?" I ask, already knowing the answer.
"How about your deal with Crowely for starters," he answers.
I sigh and look down at my feet again.
"I don't want to talk about it," I say quickly.
"Then why don't you let me talk," he says, and comes to stand in front of me.
I wince and look up at him.
"Crowely's not going to let you get away. Not ever. If you don't bring him the monsters he asks for, he will kill you."
I look back at him.
"Raphael wouldn't allow that," I say even though I'm not even sure.
Balthazar chuckles with little humor.
"That's funny. You see, he doesn't actually dare about you, he cares about the message it would send to his soldiers if his neice was killed by the King of Hell-who just so happens to be his business partner."
I wince.
"Look, you did what you had to do. I get that more than anyone-even Kristiel, as it were. But you're on thin ice right now, Keira. You need help, but you're too stubborn to ask for it."
I frown. I'm not stubborn!
"Well who am I supposed to ask," I say, my voice rising against my will, "you three are off fighting a civil war, Sam and Dean will be killed if I tell them. Who else am I supposed to ask. I think you forget that this isn't my dimension."
I reign in my temper, frowning. Balthazar considers me for a long moment.
"Keira...this is your dimension."
"What are you talking about?" I ask, confused.
"You're father was my brother. He was from this dimension. He fell for a human, much the same way Cassie did for Kristena. Except your father's ending wasn't so happy. Him and your mother were hunted. She was already pregnant with you. So, he did the only thing he could to be sure you all would be safe-he sent himself, you, and your mother into another dimension. A dimension without Heaven, Hell, monsters, or magic."
I swallow.
"So I really am half angel?" I ask.
He nods. I run a hand through my hair, frowning. My brother wasn't half angel then. He was conceived and born in this other dimension. Hell...where is this other dimension. Where's my mother and father and brother? Are they even still alive?
After a few more moments of silence, Balthazar speaks again.
"On top of everything else, I'll help you with your deal. I'll take care of the monsters and whatnot."
I press my lips together.
"Thank you, Balthazar."
He makes a face and nods.
"Yeah, sure," he says quickly, "just don't go calling me Uncle, or I think I'll lose my lunch."
I laugh even though I don't really think it's funny.
"You don't have to worry about that," I assure him.
He nods and disappears. Well, that's one weight off my shoulders. Now all that's left is the end of the world...
"Keira," Sam says.
My breath freezes in my chest.
"Sam," I say, spinning around.
He looks pissed, hurt, and surprised. Not a good combination.
"What the hell was that about? You made a deal? With Crowely?"
I bite my lip. Dammit, Balthazar, I think.
"Yes. I did."
"Why would you do that? And why wouldn't you tell me?" he asks, his intense green eyes searching mine.
"It was the only way to get away. He promised to release me if I got him monsters. He threatened to kill you if I told."
He runs a hand through his hair and wipes his hand down his face.
"That's different from usual how?"
"No, Sam, you don't understand. It wouldn't just be the usual two or three demons. It would be like an army. They would torture and kill you and Dean in front of me. There are so few people here that I love. My famliy is gone, Sam. Their either dead or in another dimension or maybe even both."
He expression clears, and he pulls me to him in a tight hug. I sigh. Finally, I'm not alone in this anymore.
"So Balthazar is going to take care of your deal?" Sam asks.
I nod.
"I just hope he doesn't get killed because of me," I say quietly.
"He won't. If Balthazar is good at anything, it's staying alive," Sam replies.
"Sam, Keira," Dean yells outside suddenly, "Krist's here. She's got some news you'll want to hear."
We run inside, and sure enough, there is Kristy. She glances at all of us, her eyes wide and panicky.
"She's risen. The Mother of All is free. We have to find her, and kill her."
Sam and I exchange glances.
"Okay. We'll find something Kris, promise," Dean says and Sam and I nod in agreement.
"Right," she says, then pauses, a far away look coming to her eyes.
"Kris?" Sam asks.
"It's ending soon," she says quietly, her voice different, "Keira, your fate will be decided in the coming confrontation. You only need be strong enough to end it."
"End what?" I ask, my voice catching.
She looks right at me, but its as if she isn't really there.
"Her."
Then Cas is there. He takes her hand and brings her back from whatever place she was in. Then they disappear, leaving us with Kristy's strange premonition.
"What do you think she meant by her?" Dean asks.
I look at Sam, but he's just as confused as I am.
"I don't know," he says, "but it's definitely not good."
I think I'll agree with him on this one.