I don't know. I really don't know oh my God. Enjoy ... I guess.
Rated R for a reason.
Chapter 34:
Hazel POV:
When Zayn arrived at his house, his sisters practically jumped on him in excitement. I stood awkwardly in the hall, looking at his sisters giving him hugs and congratulating him on the audition. The rest of the boys went home to their families to celebrate the success of the audition. Getting a 'massive, fat yes' and a standing ovation from Simon Cowell wasn't something you were gonna get on an every day basis.
Zayn's parents where going to throw a party at the Malik's house as a congratulations to all five of them. People were already invited and preparations were apparently already done. Patricia was going crazy trying to get everything done and since she wasn't going to be here tonight, she was giving Zayn the talk about keeping all bedroom doors locked and that this was only a one time thing.
Patricia and Yaser where invited to go to dinner on the other side of town together with the lads parents and the party would take place at Zayn's house. Patricia had gone shopping with her daughters to buy some things for the party while running some errands. Yaser had left for work and I was left alone with Zayn.
We were sat at the table, while thinking on what to buy. Patricia had left us with the decision of the drinks and food. She knew that we would buy alcohol and surprisingly enough, she didn't protest. As long as we cleaned up tomorrow morning, we could do anything. Subconsciously, I started comparing her to my mother. The both of them were different from each other and I wished that my mother was actually Patricia.
It's funny how a few months ago I hated the Malik's and now I was living with them for a month and treated them as my family and wanted their mum to be my mum. Who would have ever thought that.
"Hazel!"
I snapped out of my trance and looked at Zayn. "What?"
"Jesus," he mumbled rubbing his temple. "Are you coming with me?"
"Where?"
"Supermarket," he replied, standing up and taking the money from the counter top.
"Uh, yeah," I replied, standing up.
*
Half an hour later we were skidding the trolley through the supermarket aisles, swerving through the corners and avoiding from hitting people. I was sitting inside the trolley while Zayn was pushing it from behind.
Giggles erupted from my lips as we make to a slow halt. Zayn leaned on the trolley's handle heaving in deep breaths while laughing. We attempted to run away from the security guy that saw us running around with the trolley. Seeing as he was a bit chubby and Zayn was skinnier and faster than him, we got away.
"Oh look we're in the beverages' section," I announced, standing up and trying to get out of the trolley.
Zayn helped me out and after getting out, we pushed the trolley towards the vodka section. After getting what we needed, we headed towards the cash registers and waited in line. I looked in the trolley and checked that we had got everything that we needed.
"Did you get the cups?" I asked Zayn, looking around the stuff in the trolley to see if we got them.
"Um, no, I thought you got them," he replied, turning his attention from me.
"No, you said so yourself you were going to get them!" I replied breathing out heavily.
"I never said that!" he protested and I gave him a flat look.
"Whatever you say," I replied and noticed that we were next to pay. "Start getting the things out, I'll go and get them."
Without waiting for him to reply, I turned around and headed to get the cups for tonight. I walked through the aisle and looked up and down the shelves to find the cups. After spotting them and took out two packets of the cups, my eyes locked with a pair of blue eyes.
"Hazel!" he said cheerfully and my stomach literally dropped.
"Hey Chase," I replied, trying to sound happy to see him.
I had no idea why I wasn't that 'excited' or 'happy' to see him. I just didn't. Memories from prom night invaded my mind and I shook my head, getting rid of the memories.
"How are you?" he asked, approaching me.
"Uh, good good. You?" I replied, scratching my arm.
"I'm alright," he replied in his heavy British accent. "You here alone?"
"No, Zayn's here," I replied and took a step backwards. "I should get going, bye Chase."
I turned around and hurried away from him. I heard him tell me bye as I rounded the corner and walked towards the cash register. Before I turned the corner and lost sight of him, I noticed a brunette girl walking towards him and placed things in the trolley.
He had moved on. I had moved on.
**
"Shots!" Louis screamed in my ear and I winced, covering my right ear. "Bring me the vodka!"
He poured in vodka and other things to combine a shot in 7 shot cups. The boys, Jesy and I took one each and after counting to three we downed them. I felt the liquid burn down my throat and shivers ran down my spine. I smiled and breathed out heavily.
I was trying not to get too drunk but not stay sober either. I wanted to enjoy my last few weeks with my friends and enjoy my life.
When people started arriving they congratulated the boys on their audition and then the party developed from there. I looked up at the clock and noticed it was already midnight. People weren't making any movement to leave but instead were dancing around to the loud music and getting drunk.
A pair of arms twine around my waist and pulling me close to their front. From just his smell I knew instantly who he was and butterflies filled my stomach, my heart beating faster. I smiled and turned around to face him. My breath hitched in my throat when I realised how close we were. I noticed a smile etched on his lips and without a second thought, I closed the gap between us and felt his soft lips work against mine.
His arms tightened their grip around my waist and I had no idea what was going on around us. I knew people where looking at us. They could stare all they wanted. Random girls have been trying to throw themselves at Zayn all night long but he refused them and stuck by my side while the random girls threw death glares in my direction.
He pulled away and our breaths mingled together as he stared into my eyes. I bit my lip and read his face expression. My brain was all fuzzy but I had to make a decision. I either trusted him or I didn't.
Hazel Faith Anderson! Are you seriously contemplating on whether or not you trust this guy!? After everything the both of you have been through together? After all those secrets shared together? After letting him know about you being raped at the age of twelve? After letting him know all of your secrets? Do you remember prom night? Who was there to comfort you? Huh!? Sure he's selfish and stubborn and a dick and an asshole and a jerk and the list goes on and on, but the one thing you know for sure is that he has always been there for you through everything! He trusts you! You know things about him that probably his friends don't know about him. You trust him! If you didn't then he wouldn't know all the things he knows about you and you wouldn't even be having this fight with yourself in your brain.
Oh God. Did I really just think that?
Yes, yes okay I trust him. The problem here was if I was ready and comfortable with it.
You're drunk. You're seriously drunk if you think you're not ready and comfortable to have sex with him, you fucking idiot.
Well that's settled.
"Hazel?"
My eyes met his and our eyes locked. He gave me a confused look and in return, I gave him a warm smile which apparently confused him even more.
"What's wrong?" he asked, furrowing his eyebrows together.
"Nothing," I replied with a smile. I leaned in and gave him a soft kiss. "I'm going at my house, I have a bit of a headache."
Lie, obviously. I was praying that he would offer to come with me.
"Oh," he replied sadly. "Uh, do you want me to come with you?"
I smiled and nodded my head. He twined his fingers with mine and pulled me towards the front door of his house and out of his house. There were only a couple of people outside, luckily no one was vomiting their intestines out on the front yard.
Zayn pushed the gate open and we walked out of his house, then I pushed open mine and we walked up the driveway in silence. After unlocking the front door and turning off the alarm, I kicked off my shoes and breathed out heavily. Even though I haven't been in here for two days, I had missed this shit hole.
I licked my lips and let out a shaky breath. I knew what he was thinking and I knew that he knew that I was nervous. First times are really nerve wrecking, especially when you're going to do it with someone that has experience in these kind of situations.
I need help oh my God.
I can't help you here. I have no idea how to do this either! I'm your fucking brain how the hell do you expect your brain to be a genius in this kind of situation!?
"Hazel."
It wasn't a question. I turned around and the instant I was facing him, all I saw was his devious smirk before he slammed his lips against mine. He took me by surprise but I quickly responded and I instantly twined my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me. He let out a strain at the back of his throat which resulted in him biting my bottom lip making me moan.
He lifted me up in one quick motion and pressed me against the wall, while kissing down my neck. His lips roamed around my neck, trying to pick out one spot. When his lips landed right beneath my jaw I let out a quiet moan and felt his lips smirk against my skin as he sucked beneath my jawline intending to leave a mark.
"Upstairs?" he mumbled and I nodded.
Instead of putting me down and walking upstairs, he pushed me harder against the wall, giving a small thrust against my lower region and my legs tightened around his waist, gritting my teeth in annoyance. When he realised my reaction he smirked deviously and pecked my lips.
He knew what he was doing and knew how to do this while I was playing along and following his actions. He lifted me up a bit and I tightened my arms around his neck, pulling me him closer to me and locked my lips against his.
"I thought you had a headache," he mumled as his lips travelled down my neck.
"I lied," I whispered, pulling his face upwards and kissing him. He chuckled and I felt him smile against my lips.
He pulled the both of us away from the wall, he walked backwards towards the door and my eyebrows furrowed in confusement. I was going to pull away and ask him what he was doing when I heard him lock the door.
I melted into him once again and he went up the stairs in ease. He pushed my bedroom door open and slammed it shut with his foot. The both of us tumbled on the bed and I chuckled when I realised that he was a bit nervous too, I had absolutely no idea why but it made me feel a bit better. I bit his lip and he sucked in a sharp breath when he felt my cold hands roam beneath his shirt. The feel of his hot skin against my cold fingertips, sent shivers down my spine.
I pulled his shirt off, leaving my hands to wander across his naked torso, shoulders and slightly dug my nails in his skin when I felt his hands against my skin beneath my shirt. His fingertips grazed across my skin beneath my shirt. Then trailed downwards and unbuttoned the button and pulled down the zipper to my shorts. He locked his eyes with mine and I had no idea what to do next. He smiled and pulled down my shorts, throwing them somewhere in my bedroom.
He did all the magic with his fingers and I let out a moan. He slammed his lips against mine, blocking out any sound that was going to come out of my mouth as he continued doing whatever he was doing in my lower region. I pushed my hips upwards and bit his lip hard.
I rotated positions and smirked down at the surprised looking Zayn. I sat down on him, my knees either side of him. He narrowed his eyes at me and gave me a side smile. I unbuttoned his jeans and pulled them down. The feeling of him was weird but it was good weird? I had no idea and I was following my instincts, hoping that I wasn't doing anything wrong.
After finishing, he flipped me over and hovered over me. I let out a shaky breath and prepared myself for what was coming next.
"I'm not gonna hurt you," he whispered softly and searched my eyes.
"I trust you," I whispered and the spark in his eyes sent fireworks shooting all around my body.
He gave me an apologetic smile and in one quick movement, he eased himself in me quickly and a sharp pain arose from my lower region. It was practically screaming at me to stop but as I relaxed and took in a few deep breaths and Zayn moved back and forth, all I felt was pleasure. I let out a sigh and closed my eyes as Zayn moved in and out, repeating the movement.
My nails dug in Zayn's sweaty back and he took in a sharp intake of breath as his movement quickened. After a few minutes, I felt my body literally smash into tiny pieces and I let out a sigh I didn't realise I was holding. A few seconds later, he pulled out and flopped down next to me.
I closed my eyes and let out a tiny smile. I felt a pair of eyes studying me and when I opened my eyes and turned my head towards Zayn, our eyes locked together. I tilted my head and studied his face expression.
"What?" I asked sounding a bit frustrated, after I couldn't read his expression.
"Nothing," he smiled. "You're so beautiful."
I felt myself start blushing and I was thankful for the fact that it was dark and that we hadn't turned on any sort of lights. He smiled and reached his hand toward my face, trailing his fingertips across my cheeks leaving tingles against my skin.
"Are you tired?" he asked after a few minutes of comfortable silence. I nodded and the realisation of sleep dawned on me and I suddenly felt extremely tired. "Sleep."
He twined his arms around me and pulled me close to him. I nuzzled my face against his chest and let out a deep breath. I felt my eyes start to droop in sleep and I started dozing off when his voice pulled me back to reality.
"I love you," he mumbled quietly against my head, but loud enough for me to hear him.
I smiled at those simple three words.
"I love you, too."