It was the summer before sophomore year. I was dating my best friend. He was incredible. He was adorable and cute and could always make me smile. His name was Justin. We had grown up together and it was inevitable that we would date. Our parents always joked about it. They weren't surprised when it actually happened.
We were sitting on the old beat up swings in his backyard, when he turned to me. "Selena, I love you." He said to me seriously. He caught me by surprise. I had no idea what to say. I didn't know if I loved him back. We were fifteen. How was I supposed to now if I loved someone? I mean I loved Justin but I didn't know if it was the kind of love he was looking for. We were best friends, I couldn't remember a time without him. "Selena?" He said my name nervously. "Don't you love me back?" He asked as his voice cracked.
"Justin, I don't know. I don't know if I love you. We are fifteen. How are we supposed to know?" I said feeling horrible. I didn't want to hurt him.
"I don't know. I just know that I love you, Selena. You make me happy. I smile like a fool whenever you're around. Selena, I love you. Don't you feel it too?" His eyes started to water but he turned away from to try and hide it. I couldn't believe what was about to happen. Justin and I were about to break up. Justin was my first kiss and my first boyfriend. We had done everything together. He was the one constant in my life. I had a hard time imagining this year without him.
"I'm-I'm sorry Justin." My own tears started to swell up in my eyes. My chest hurt.
"I guess this is it then." He stood up from his swing and wiped a tear away. "Have a nice life." He turned and walked inside his house. I stood there watching him walk into his house not believing what just happened. I walked home by myself for the first time. Justin would always walk me home, but I guess a lot of things were going to change.
When school started everything was mostly the same except Justin and I never talked. He wouldn't even look at me in the hallways. I was completely lost without him. It was two weeks into the school year when there was news going around the halls that a new kid was at school.
I was sitting in my English class, when he walked through the door. He looked amazing. His chocolate brown curls that looked messy but they were neat. If that made sense. He walked swiftly into the room and over to my boring English teacher who hadn't even noticed him walk in. I looked around the room and every girl was staring at him in awe and every guy was staring at him pissed. I looked back over to where he was standing and I saw my English teacher point over by me. That's when I realized the only empty seat was right next to me. He looked straight at me with his beautiful brown eyes. He gracefully walked over and sat in the empty desk.
He leaned over, "Hey, I'm Nick." He flashed the most amazing smile I had ever seen.
"I'm Selena." I couldn't help but smile. He smiled back.
"Well, Selena, it's nice to meet you." I smiled like a fricken idiot.
"It's nice to meet you too." My heart was pounding in my chest and butterflies were flying up a storm in my stomach. Was this what Justin meant?
Two weeks later and Nick and I were really good friends. I loved spending every second with him. I was standing by the door of his science class waiting for him to walk out so we could walk home but he didn't come out. I was about to walk away when I turned around to see Nick standing there with flowers and two pieces of paper.
"Selena Marie Gomez, I am crazy about you! Will you please go to homecoming with me?" He flashed that amazing smile I have been in love with since we met.
"Yes!" I jumped into his arms.
Homecoming was amazing. Nick asked me to be his girlfriend while we were dancing to a slow song. I thought I was in love.
Three months passed and it was January. Nick and I were going strong as ever. At least I thought we were. We were at his house, and no one was home. We were up in his room and he was showing me all of his medals for baseball. I was lying on his bed as he put his last medal away and he came on the bed and kissed me. We laid there making out for a while when he began to take off his shirt. His hands soon found my shirt and lifted it over my head. He pulled at my jeans, unbuckling them and sliding them off. I did the same with his. Soon we were making out in our underwear.
"N-Nick, I'm a virgin." I stuttered as he unclasped my bra.
He stopped and looked at me. "Do you want me to stop?"
"No." I didn't want him to stop. Just the sensation of his skin on mine made my stomach do back flips. I wanted to share everything with him. Justin had all of the other firsts, I was ready to share this with Nick.
"I promise I'll be gentle." He whispered into my neck giving me goosebumps. His fingers found my lace underwear, sliding them gently down my legs. His fingertips brushed over my stomach, everything felt electrified. His hands cupped my breasts as his tongue fought for entrance. I was inpatient and moved my hands towards his boxers, sliding them down his waist. He positioned himself at my entrance. "Are you ready?" He asked. I nodded before he pushed himself all the way in. My eyes watered at the pain as I adjusted to his length. "I'm sorry baby girl." He wiped a tear away before he began to gently thrust in and out of me.
We were laying on his bed panting after when we heard his parents pull into the drive way.
"Shit." We both said as we hurried to get our clothes on. Nick opened the door to his room and turned the TV on. I was trying to make his bed. And just as the door closed downstairs we both sat on the bed and looked up at the TV like we were watching it. I had no idea what was on, it was some show on MTV but I really didn't care.
"Hey, Nick, Hey, Selena!" His mom said as she came up the stairs.
"Hey, Mom. How was shopping?" He asked her like he was interested.
"It was wonderful. What did you two do all day?" She asked curious.
"Oh, we just watched a movie and I showed Selena my medals and now we are just watching MTV." He told most of the truth, he just left out a few details.
"Sounds like a great day. I am going to put everything away." She walked out of his room as we heard her feet on the stairs.
"That was close." I let out a breath as Nick moved closer to me.
"I know." He said as he kissed me gently on my forehead.
"But that was amazing." I remembered back to what we just shared together.
"Yeah it was. You were my first too babe."
A week passed and I was on my way to meet up with Nick at school when someone stopped me in the hall and told me something I wish I never would have had to hear. Someone told me that they saw Nick with another girl at a party the weekend before. The weekend he told me he was out of town. My heart sunk as I slowly walked to where I was supposed to meet Nick.
"Hey babe." He wrapped me in a hug. He looked at me as he pulled away and realized something was wrong. "What's going on?" He asked me concerned.
"Did you have fun on your trip? I asked sarcastically.
"Yeah, I already told you about it, Sel. What's going on?" He asked me with concern in his eyes.
"Yeah, but you left out the part about a party and a girl." I turned away from his amazing brown eyes.
"What party? What girl?" He asked confused. "You mean my family reunion? And my cousin?"
"I don't know, Nick. I just heard you were with some girl at a party." A tear began to roll down my cheek.
"Selena, I never went to any party besides my family reunion. I would never cheat on you. I love you, Selena." He tried to pull me into a hug.
"I don't know Nick." I backed away. "I need some time to think."
"Selena, if you don't believe me now, you never will." He walked away from me.
It had been about a week since we broke up. I was miserable. I was so angry at Nick for cheating on me. I went for a walk and as I turned the corner I ran into someone. "I am so sorry." I looked up to find Justin standing there.
"Hey." He said awkwardly. "How've you been?" I was sort of shocked he was saying words to me.
"To tell you the truth I feel terrible." I tried not to cry.
"Really? What happened?" He asked me concerned.
I told Justin everything that had happened last week as we walked back to his house. I hadn't been there for so long, it felt weird but nice. He was there for me and I missed that. He listened to me and that was what I needed. We went up to his bedroom sat on his bed for a while catching up on life. He leaned in and kissed me. I didn't hesitate. I was so mad at Nick and this was so familiar and it felt good. But the next thing we knew we were laying on his bed wearing absolutely nothing. I soon realized I messed up big and got out of there as soon as possible. Justin was upset but I think he understood.
It was Friday when Justin called me and invited me to go to a party with him. I decided to go because it would get my mind off of things. I ended up getting absolutely wasted. I could barely even remember that night. I met some junior who was really hot and we made out then we went up to a bedroom and I woke up the next morning in a stranger's bed next to some guy that was named Taylor.
The next week I saw Nick in the hall and I couldn't help but go up and talk to him. I missed him so much and everything I tried to do to get over him didn't work.
"Nick?" I walked up to him.
"Hey." He said guarded.
"I think I messed up. I miss you so much and I should have never believed that you would cheat on me. I was stupid to believe a stupid rumor from someone I don't even know." A tear dripped down my cheek.
He didn't say anything. He didn't have to. I knew he forgave me. He wrapped his arms around me as I was balling my eyes out. I looked up at him smiling through my tears when all of a sudden I felt horrible. I held my stomach and then threw up barely missing Nick.