I’m writing this letter because I don’t know what else to do. I can no longer bottle these emotions because I feel so much. This may sound like gibberish and nonsensical, but please hear me out. Just hear me out.
I love how your eyes sparkle every single time.
I love your smile.
I love your laugh and how infectious it is.
I love that you are not afraid to do the things you want.
I love how shameless and awkward you can be.
I love your sense of humor.
I love how you dance.
I love how you are.
But I also hate you.
I hate it when you catch me staring at you.
I hate it when you stand there in the corner, oblivious yet shining like the sun.
I hate it when you look into my notebook and you don’t realize that your eyes, nose, and hair are drawn all over the pages.
I hate it when I give you signs and clues and you ignore them all.
I hate it when you are with her.
I hate it when you make me jealous.
I hate it when you make me feel things I shouldn’t feel.
I hate it when you make me imagine scenarios of “us” inside my head.
I hate it when you make me nervous.
I hate it when you make me do stupid things, like trying to draw you a portrait or trying to write a dumb letter.
I hate you because you made me fall for you. You made me love you, and you don’t even know it.
_________ ׂׂૢ་༘࿐
nonsensical
Alice Salvo