Kai
Lilah has been unconscious for almost two days. Dame and I have been taking turns staying with her, holding her so she knows she's not alone. A few times she's whimpered in his sleep, her eyebrows furrowing which only makes my heart hurt more.
I can only imagine what type of nightmare she's in right now. If He life has been anything like the rest of ours, I wouldn't wish those nightmares on anyone, especially her.
I only vaguely remember the night she was stabbed, the bloodlust and anger took over my body completely until all I has eyes for was Lilah. There was nothing more important in that moment than her, and one moment she was in my arms driving back to our house, the next I was waking up chained in the basement. This type of breakdown has happened before, but it seriously pissed me off to know that I had been away from Lilah for hours. I was supposed to be able to protect her, but my brother's had taken that away from me.
When they finally let me go I threw a couple hands at all of them. Regardless, I haven't left Lilah's side since I got out.
She looks so vulnerable in this moment, wearing nothing but a pair of light blue panties and one of Onyx's white t shirts. None of us have mentioned the scars we found on Lilah's body when we had to get her clothes off. There are some scars I am more familiar with, such as cigarette burns, along her panty line, but then there are also choppy ones along her sides. They look horrific, and I can only imagine how they were earned.
There is nothing I want more than to hunt down the fucker that gave her those and beat them to a bloody pulp. Maybe then I'll show her and fuck her in his blood.
I snuggle a little further into her body, inhaling the smell of her hair as I place my hand against her stomach, enjoying the warmth that emanates from her skin.
I'm starting to drift off to sleep, when Lilah's body goes rigid. My eyes open instantly, but before I can say anything to see if she's awake, she's throwing herself off of the bed, away from me. She looks around the room with frantic glazed eyes, noting me on the bed in nothing but my boxers.
That seems cause her to panic at the sight, her breathing coming in harsh pants as her whole body starts to shake in what can only be described as fear.
I open my mouth to tell her it's ok and explain what happened, but before any words come out, she's taking off, throwing the door open so hard, I'm worried the hinges might bend.
I'm quick to get out of bed and follow her, running down the hall and stairs until I meet a crazed looking Athena standing in the kitchen. Her eyes are wide and a glazed look in her eyes looking a lot worse than it did when she first woke up. It's almost like Lilah has checked out completely.
Maverick and Onyx are standing a few yards away with their hands up. Dame comes running down the stairs, joining me as we stand next to them trying to figure out what the fuck set her off.
"Get the fuck away from me!" Lilah screams pushing herself further into the back wall, looking around the room for a possible escape.
"Lilah it's ok, let us take you back to bed." Maverick says in a soothing voice. I've never heard him speak like that and it speaks to how much he cares about Lilah even if he says its all bullshit. If I wasn't so worried about my girl I would videotape him to prove it to him in the future.
"No, no, no. I'm not going back, I don't want to go back, don't make me go back there, I can't." She says, tears pooling in her eyes as she looks at each of us with fear. I let out a low growl in my throat, annoyed at the fact that she's afraid of us right now. She should not be afraid of us.
The sound startles her and only makes her shake more, her eyes darting across the kitchen until they flash with recognition before looking back at Maverick who is glaring at me.
"It's ok Lilah, you can trust us." Onyx says, trying to sound as kind as possible. I didn't think Onyx was capable of being soft, especially when one look at him could make you shit your pants in fear, but it really looks like he's trying for Lilah. Does he care about her the way I care about her? Ironically, there isn't an ounce of jealousy at the idea, moreso happiness that Lilah is doing something to him. No one can break Onyx, even us. He never shows us the full extent of his mask, but perhaps Lilah has a chance at shattering it.
Although Onyx is clearly trying, and to any of us we can see the difference, Lilah must not be able to because with extremely quick moves she's grabbing a knife off of the far counter and holding it to her throat as she looks each of us in the eye.
"Woah, babygirl, let's put that down." I say, my voice tinged with both anger and concern.
"Kai, shut the fuck up. You've done enough." Maverick growls.
"You're going to take me back to him. I'd rather die than go back there!" Lilah screams, her voice broken. Onyx takes a step forward, but quickly retreats when Lilah turns sharper towards him, the knife digging into her throat until a smal trail of blood slips down the column of her neck.
"I think she's having a flashback." Dame says as he looks at her with concern.
"Well, what the fuck do we do?!" I hiss at him, my nerves started to get the best of me, especially since seeing the woman I care about in danger.
We all knew that Lilah has seen some shit considering the scars on her body, but we didn't know much about it. Considering she kills people for a living and is a well known hitman, we didn't think someone as broken as the woman in front of us could exist within Lilah.
Has she been hiding all this pain all this time?
"Let me talk to her." Dame says shifting in front of me and Maverick. As much as I want to argue against Dame, I know out of all of us, he would be the best person to talk to Lilah in this situation.
Dame went through a lot of shit as a kid, and when we first started hanging out he used to get some pretty bad flashbacks, but nothing like this. He was always able to pull himself out of it, but it gave us a new perspective on what he had been through.
"Lilah?" Dame says in a small voice getting down on his knees and looking up at her. It's a submissive position to put himself in, especially considering she has a weapon, but I guess that was his point. She obviously was victimized and maybe puting her in the threating role will give her some control. "What is going to happen to you?"
Her bottom lip quivers as the world outside of her and him drift away. I can see it in her glazed blue eyes that all her focus is on the man in front of her right now. I should be happy that Dame was able to get through to her, but I can't help but be upset that I wasn't able to. I know that I am the one people go to when they want blood and pain, but seeing how timid Lilah is, I want to be her comfort. I don't want to be the one that gives her more pain and fear, and it doesn't feel like I'm doing that.
That's what it felt like when I met her at the club that night. I want Lilah to want me.
The night we chained her downstairs and she took me on and won, I fell in love with her. It felt like she challenged my demon side and he met his match. I want her to see all of me: the smiles, the jokes, the anger, the bloodlust. Is she capable of being that for me or will I just hurt her like I do everyone else?
"He's gonna hurt me." Lilah whispers, her voice cracking as tears stream down her cheeks. There is nothing i want more than to run up and hold her in my arms right now. She lets out a sob as her eyes close and she drops the knife to the floor, "He's gonna breed me." She drops to the floor on her knees. Dame is there to catch her and hold her close as she continues to sob and scream into his shirt, all the while we stand there looking at the woman in front of us.
I don't know how long it lasts. It could have been an hour or maybe ten minutes, but her cries slowly dwindle down until her breathing evens out.
"I think she's asleep now." Dame says, stroking her hair away from her face.
"Did she says that someone wants to breed her?" Onyx asks disgusted.
I am equally as disturbed. I had no doubt that some bad shit had happened to Lilah, but if this is the only snippet I get, i can only imagine how much worse it is. Clearly, some man tried to take advantage of her, and I'm not sure I'll survive knowing if he did or not.
"Take her to bed and stay with her Dame." Mav says, and as I'm about to speak up and say it's my turn, Mav turns to me and says, "If she comes to again, Dame can handle it. I'm not sure you can."
I'd be lying if I said that didn't hurt, so I do what I do best: I scowl and make my way out the front door, slamming it behind me as I start to trudge towards my bike.
I throw my leg over my Yamaha, snapping my helmet and visor on as I kick off and take down the street.
Fuck, I need blood, I need pain, I need everything to take my mind off of Lilah right now.
I push my bike harder, taking the speed even higher; the buildings and people pass in a blur. I grit my teeth as I continue to weave along the road, trying to rid my mind of her pale cerulean eyes and her long brown hair.
Lilah is an addiction, and I've already snagged a taste, so there is no going back now. Everything that happened tonight makes me realize how perfect she is for us, or at least for Dame.
Not me, never me.
Seeing her stand there with a knife to her throat almost killed me. She held her life in her hands like it was nothing, when in reality she is my everything.
What I have for Lilah is so far beyond an obsession. The more I find out about her, the more I crave her.
Her soft skin, the way her lips molded to mine that night at the club. The way she scraped her nails through my hair was almost as delectable as the way her pussy clenched on my dick when I was buried inside of her.
I groan internally at the idea of her squirming beneath me as I slam inside her, fuck.
I don't even realize I'm peeling off the street and going down an alley until I come to a stop at the back entrance of the club I was just thinking about.
There's no one around, but if I listen closely enough I can almost hear the memory of Lilah's soft moans as she exploded around me.
This is the memory I want of her: the one where she is falling apart because of me, not the one of her breaking down because of me.
Lilah's past is that; the past. All I have to convince her of is that I can be her future. I will be her future.