~Lea~
It's the second day of our conference here in Baguio and I couldn't get more excited because it also means that we're going home today. I miss my son so much, even though we just facetimed last night. As I entered the venue, I greeted my co-doctors and then occupied the seat from the second table. As a sign of respect, I nodded at the other doctors, who settled on the seats at the same table as I was. I am familiar with them but not too familiar to be able to initiate a conversation.
I fished out my phone and checked the schedule for today. We'll be having our last guest speaker today. I have read his name in several medical journals yet I am not familiar with his face. His innovations and discoveries about different concepts amaze me because, at the age of 70 years, his capability and dedication to our profession are still beyond this world.
I was busy looking at my phone when the speaker started. I stared at him for a moment because it felt like I had seen his face somewhere else. Anyway, his looks are definitely younger than his real age.
For almost 3 hours, he talked about different topics which piqued my interest. Out of all the guest speakers, Dr. Emmanuelle Mejia is the best. Not that I am disregarding the efforts of the other speakers, but Dr. Mejia doesn't let a dead space fill us in. He always has something that will surely wake us.
Nothing special really happened but I won't deny it, his talk was really short and I needed more. On the way back to Manila, I was still writing notes regarding what he discussed and that kept me busy from the long travel and the traffic.
"Mommy!" I heard my son shout as soon as my foot landed on the ground. How I miss that! I kneeled to level with his height then I hugged him tight enough.
"I miss you so much, mommy! By the way, Dad is here! He played toys with me!" And that's what I didn't miss.
I released him from the hug, "I missed you, too, my very good boy! Really? Dad's here?"
"Yes! Come!" He pulled me and that's my cue to stand up. I let him pull me until we reached Miguel.
"Hi!" He greeted shyly.
"Oh, hi!" I replied, not wanting to initiate a conversation. "Luke, can mommy rest muna? I am exhausted from the trip kasi eh! You play with daddy muna ha?" I can accept if ever someone will label me as a bad mother at this moment because I sure as hell am. I am using my son to escape my problem. I know the reason why he's here.
"You won't play with us, mom?" My son looks disappointed and I cannot say no to that face that he's making but I can't stay in the same location as his father either.
"How about tomorrow? Would that be okay? Let mommy rest muna."
"Yes, Luke! Let your mom rest first." He seconded which I am partly thankful for.
I kissed my son before walking towards my room. As I closed my door, I was able to breathe. My situation shouldn't be as awkward as this. It shouldn't be and I know that it is not Miguel who is making things harder than it seems-- it's myself.
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"Again, where is the ground reaction force located in the heel strike?"
I saw that only one hand was raised, and it was definitely from Dave, so I called him. "Posterior to ankle, through the knee, and anterior to the hip, doc."
"Very good!" I smiled secretly. I am very proud of him. If only you could see him, he's not the antukin Dave. He's very far from that now.
"Now, enough with the things I taught. Let me now ask you something that will make you think." I thought of an intermediate-level type of question and I did come up with one. "A patient comes to you with a weakness of the right gluteus medius muscle and you noticed that the patient manifests a specific gait deviation. A doctor then prescribed a cane or a briefcase to the patient to aid in the weakness. First question: What is the gait deviation of the patient?"
Several hands were raised. I called one from the back. "It's Tredelenburg gait, doc."
I expected it to be answered because that was easy. "Right! And what do you think is the nerve injured?" I followed up.
"Inferior gluteal nerve, doc." She seems so confident.
"Are you sure about that?"
"Uhh, superior po pala!"
"So, ano talaga?" I crossed my arms and a smile escaped my mouth. I like teasing.
"Superior gluteal nerve po, doc. Final answer na po iyan."
I smiled. "Correct! Remember that Inferior Gluteal Nerve is for the big one which is the G. Max while the superior gluteal nerve is for the smaller muscle of the glutes. Good job, Ms. Lim!" I commended her then I saw her breathe. Gosh, am I that terror?
"Next, as a competitive and very amazing PT, where will you place the cane?" Everyone answered contralateral and that's good because they are all right. "Good! Cane will be placed on the left side because the action of the g. med is to prevent the contralateral side of the pelvis from dropping. So, if there's right g. meds weakness, malamang, yung left ang mag-drop so doon ka maglalagay ng cane. Understood?" They all answered yes.
"How about the briefcase? Where do you think is the best side to carry it?"
I saw two hands, and one was from Dave, so I called the other to give a chance.
"Carry it on the left side rin po because weak na po yung right." Answered by the top 1 of their class.
"Okay, how about you, Mr. De Guzman?"
"Carry it on the right side po because the manifestation of the weakness of the right g. med is on the left which means 'pag mas mabigat yung left, mas may effort sa right g. med."
"Alright, thank you, guys! You may now sit. Ngayon, kayong buong class ang tatanungin ko. You guys vote who among them is correct and kapag tama kayo, I'll treat you." Everyone cheered but pressured at the same time. I gave them a moment to think and when I asked them. Majority voted for the top 1 and only 3 voted for Dave. They probably did not analyze but chose who among the two is the best. Yes, makakatipid ako!
"Guys, the correct answer is Dave and he even gave us the explanation. Will you please repeat what you said?" He stood up and repeated everything. Again, I feel proud.
"Paano ba yan? Kaunti lang ang ma-treat ko? Anyway, review well and goodluck on your examinations! Goodbye!"
"Goodbye, doc! Thank you po!"
After that, I immediately asked someone to order from KFC and give it to those who won, while I packed my things because I also deserve to treat myself. I timed out and was about to enter my car when a faculty approached me.
"Doc Salvatorre!"
"Yes, ma'am Alex?"
"Sorry po, doc for the late info pero pwede raw po kaya kayong mag-coach even just for a few sessions for the national PT quiz bee?"
"Who are the participants and when?"
"Top 1 to 3 po ng section na tinuturuan niyo. Si Angela, Dave and Vince po."
"Oh!"
"This Friday po sana, if you're available po, doc."
I scratched the back of my head. "Let me check my schedule, ma'am, ha? I am not sure if there will be any conflict kasi I was not able to have a consultation last week due to the conference and habulin ko sana lahat ng patients din. Let me get back to you after I converse with my secretary, ha?"
"Thank you, doc!"
"No problem!"
"Ingat po kayo!" I was only able to reply with a smile.
I drove away and found a place to eat something nice. These past few days, I have been haunted by my what-ifs, Miguel, and now, stress. I need to treat myself even once in a while because I also deserve this. We all deserve to eat alone in peace while enjoying ourselves.
Upon entering the restaurant, my sight immediately landed on one of the tables, a little bit far from the door. I requested to be sat there and they gladly granted my request. I am no celebrity but I would like some peace and quiet at this moment wherein nobody will get my attention. They handed me the menu and I ordered what seemed to be mouthwatering for me.
While waiting for my order, I did not dare to get my phone from my bag because I knew that messages would only stress the hell out of me. If ever someone needs me, I know that they will call. I scanned the whole place and I saw that only a few people dined in with me.
"These are delicious! I should definitely bring my son here!" I told myself as I continued to put everything I ordered into my mouth. I picked up the wine glass and poured the wine I just ordered. After tasting it, I couldn't believe that everything that went into my stomach made me really happy. Worth every penny, indeed!
"Excuse me..." I heard a man say but I was so busy with my business that I did not even glance. Plus, I also don't know anybody here so he might be mistaken, that's what I assumed.
"Excuse me..." He repeated so I rotated my head towards the man.
"Dr. Mejia!" I almost yelled my wine out. I stood up from my seat as fast as I could. Goodness, how did we even meet here? "What are you doing here?" We shook hands as a formal gesture.
I was so excited to meet him that I forgot why he even called my attention.
"Dr. Salvatorre..." He even knows my name. "Lea..."
My eyebrows almost formed a straight line when he addressed me by my first name.
"I have something to tell you, Lea." His face wasn't even showing any signs of emotion and that made my heart skip a beat. He wasn't like this when he was doing a lecture in Baguio. What did I do?
"Am I in trouble?" I bit my lips after asking but he shakes his head. Phew!
"I would like to---" We were interrupted when my phone suddenly rang.
"Excuse me, doc, but I have to answer this call."
"It's okay. Go on!" He said calmly and so I fished out my phone from my bag. It was my son's yaya.
"Yes, Ate Ce? What do you need?" The moment I heard Ate Ce's shaky voice, I knew that something wrong happened with my son. She stated everything and that calls for my attention although she informed me that Miguel was already there. I ended the call and faced Dr. Mejia with uneasiness. I would like to leave but I am ashamed since he approached me first. My palms aren't sweaty but it becomes one due to my son's condition. I played with my phone as I turned to him.
"What were you saying, doc?" I try to sound fine but I am not being good at it at this minute.
"Maybe next time na lang, Lea. May important call ka ata. It's okay."
"No, it's fine. Just finish your sentence then I'll be on my way."
He sighed, "Fine. I-I would like to introduce myself to you. I am Emmanuelle T. Mejia--- your biological father."
It seems like my vision and hearing become clouded because what the hell did I just hear? My biological parents are long gone, why is there another one? I stared at him for one good minute without giving him a response.
"I-I should go, doc! My son needs me. I'm sorry." That was the only thing I managed to say. I get my bag, and because I feel like I cannot control any part of my body, the wine glass falls to the ground as the bag hits it. The waitress responded quickly and I made my way out.
I don't know what to do. All I want is a stress-free environment, is it too much to ask? I was trembling and I felt like I walked 1 kilometer from the restaurant itself up to where I parked my car.
I can't breathe... I loosened up my clothes and tried so hard to control my breathing and when I made sure that I was fine, I drove. I was at the last intersection before I could finally see my son when I heard a loud noise. As I opened my eyes, I felt something dripping down my forehead, and it didn't take a doctor to know what that was. Before the rescue even came, I already felt my consciousness slowly ebbing from my body.