22: Silence
Riku hasn't talked to me for two whole days. I would go to the bookstore only to find it closed. He wouldn't answer my calls and text. Did something happened? Did Ki die? No, that can't be it. The only place I was too scared to go to was his place
It was a Thursday and I knew that eventually Yuuto would come home. A part of me wants him to stay with me, but a part wants him to just leave me so I can stop this drama.
If I initiate the break up I would have nowhere to go. I would be in trouble, and I don't want to move back with my folks.
I build up my courage and went to Riku's house. I had to take a bus there, and when I was finally face to face with it, I knew he was home. I saw his car in the driveway. I composed myself and went to ring the doorbell.
He opened the door after a few seconds. His face looked tired and blank.
"What?" He said flatly.
"Did I do something? I'm confused." I said.
"Why didn't you tell me you have a boyfriend?"
I swore at that moment I stopped breathing. How did he know?
"Look I can explain." I didn't even know how to word things anymore. What will happen after this. "May I come in?"
He looked a little hesitant, but stepped aside so I could come in. I went to sit on the couch and he sat down on a separate couch this time away from me. It hurt that only just a few days ago I was snuggling close to him.
"Explain Emi."
"I applied for the job originally because I wanted to contribute to rent. Yuuto pays all the rent. I wasn't trying to shoot my shot at anyone. He has been abusive and I guess I became vulnerable. At first I enjoyed the attention, but I soon honestly did developed feelings." I looked down ashamed of myself.
"Yeah, I did as well until you basically played me." He said looking away from me.
"I'm really sorry."
"Emi, don't come to work. I will be closing up for a few days and finding new people. I'm sorry."
He was firing me. What did I expect? I didn't think this small talk was going to change anything. If anything I was wishful thinking hoping that he could see through the lies and forgive me.
"I understand." I slowly got up.
"And Emi, please don't text me anymore." He got up and showed me to the door. I kept screaming in my head that he will change his mind, but the walk was silent. It felt like time was moving so slowly yet so fast. As soon as I step foot out this door, we are done. I moved one then both feet outside and felt the door close behind me. I felt the warm trickles of tears dripping down my face.
-
When I got home I went to the drawer where I hid my photo of Yuuto and me. It felt really sad, but I felt nothing. The only thing holding me by a thread for my relationship is just a roof over my head. I have no money saved up to move out. I quickly took out my phone and called Ayame.
"Hello?" She sounded confused.
"It's Emi."
There was silence on the phone until she spoke.
"What do you want?"
"I'm really sorry. Firstly, did you get the makeup I placed on the counter at the store?"
"Yeah."
"And again I'm sorry. I honestly wasn't trying to hit on the manager at all I promised. We did hang out and I guess I grew to develop feelings, but it doesn't matter anymore because he found out about my boyfriend."
"Oh shit, how?" She sounded immersed.
"I have no idea. I want to break up with my boyfriend because he's been hitting me. I couldn't tell you I'm sorry."
"Oh my god Emi, why?"
"I'm just embarrassed. I need a huge favor though."
"Yeah?"
"Could I stay with you until I can find a place of my own? I will do anything. I don't want my boyfriend to come back and potentially beat me to death when I tell him I'm breaking it off."
"But doesn't he know where you work?"
"I got fired too." I sighed.
"Ah okay okay I'll send you the address."
I thanked her profusely as I started packing away all my stuff. I didn't have much so it didn't take as long.
-
Ayame lived in a very small complex. She lived on her own after her roommate moved out to live with her boyfriend so she had a spare room. When I first saw her it felt like forever and I ran to hug her. Surprisingly her embrace was just as tight.
"I have missed you Emi. Come in."
She showed me around. The rooms were very neat, but a lot of girly stuff decorated the walls. Mostly pictures and I could tell Ayame had a lot of friends from all the polaroids that lined the walls.
"Emi, you have to tell me everything, and I mean everything. I won't beat you up for liking Riku. I know he doesn't like me. I guess I was just hurt."
"I promise I will. I just have to handle my relationship first."
"Right. Go settle down and I'll give you some privacy. I'll go get some food for dinner if that's cool?"
"Yeah of course." I smiled.
"Your face looks bad. It's swollen. Leave this piece of shit." She looked really upset as she left.
-
After I decorated my room very minimally I took out my phone and called Yuuto. He picked up in two rings.
"What's up?" He said.
"I think we should officially break up.." I said fearing the worst.
"Haha you're serious? I heard you got fired. You need me you unless bitch!" He started raising his voice and I hung up.
To Be Continued