Bucky was having the same nightmare again, where he killed Mr. Nakajima's son. He tossed and turned but eventually managed to make it through the night. The same lullaby comforted him, a song he could only remember in his subconscious, apparently.
He blinked himself awake with the sound of giggling and humming. The morning sun reflected on two kids playing with the shield and a woman humming the song from his dream. The scene was almost ethereal, and he had to blink a couple more times to make sure he wasn't still dreaming.
"Hey," he greeted the kids, who got startled. They panicked, trying to put the shield back in place, and fled the scene, not wanting to get in trouble with their uncle or mother.
The woman, though, remained unfazed, shuffling around the kitchen preparing breakfast.
"Someone holds me
Safe and warm
Horses prance through
A silver storm
Figures dancing gracefully
Across my memory."
Bucky straightened himself on the couch, frowning in her direction. She was singing the song of his dreams, but he didn't know if it was a coincidence or if it meant something.
"Far away, long ago
Glowing dim
As an amber
Things my heart
Used to know
Things it yearns to remember--"
"It's you," he declared. Lorna paused and turned to him with a confused look. "You sing this song while I sleep."
"Sometimes, when I return to the apartment in the middle of the night, you're having a nightmare, and I do it to try to calm you down."
"I heard this song before."
"My mom used to sing it to my siblings." She approached him with a cup and plate in each hand, which she put in front of him on the center table. It was black coffee, eggs, and bacon.
"I remember it from Wakanda," he commented, a faraway look in his eyes.
"I used to sing it there, too," she revealed. "While working with Shuri on deleting the Winter Soldier program from your brain. I saw you having a nightmare last night. It's no big deal."
"Why do you keep doing that?"
Lorna shrugged, trying not to avert from his intense stare. His blue eyes were hypnotizing.
"You deserve a good night of sleep. And, as I said, it's no big deal."
"No, not this," he shook his head. "I mean all these things you do for me. In Wakanda, the nightmares, even breakfast!" He motioned to the untouched plate. "Why do you do all these things when we barely know each other?"
The young woman pursed her lips.
"I know what you went through with HYDRA," she began quietly. "And I know how difficult it is to move on from it and how it feels like losing everything, including your own self. Tony was the one who kept me afloat, but now that he's gone, I'm trying to find on my own a way to live and cope with everything. And then I saw goodness in you that I couldn't see in myself. So, I wanted to cherish it because it gave me hope. Hope that maybe I'm not a lost cause."
Bucky had mixed feelings about her declaration. He didn't think their experiences with HYDRA could compare to one another. But he could relate to having someone who kept you grounded and secure. Steve was that person to him, and now he found himself in the same predicament as Lorna.
She didn't know who she was and if she could be any more than what HYDRA made of her. She was scared of the answer, but she was trying.
He realized he acted hostile toward her because he shared the same fears but couldn't accept them. So, he pushed her away because he couldn't face the truth.
"And, yes," she continued. "Maybe I overstepped when I thought you could reciprocate my feelings, but I understand it's not like that. I'm not in the right state of mind to be any good to anyone in a relationship. Everyone thinks I'll relapse at any moment--"
"Relapse?"
Lorna blinked in surprise before lowering her gaze in shame.
"I mean, I don't have the best mental health." Bucky's breath hitched when he understood the implication of her words. "But I'm fine now," she reassured. "The last time was after the Blip. I've been stable since then - even after Tony left. So, you don't have to look at me like that."
"Like what?" He asked dumbly.
"With pity," she deadpanned. "I'm not a time bomb. But I get it. No one would like to be with a 'crazy' woman."
"You're not crazy." He argued, rising to his feet to stress his statement. Bucky was still trying to process that fragile and vulnerable version of Lorna, but he didn't enjoy hearing her talking about herself like that. "You're not crazy. You're just... grieving."
Her eyes glossed with unshed tears.
"Thank you."
"And you're right," he confessed. "I don't know who I am. I feel like the Winter Soldier is still here, somewhere," he motioned to his chest, "and it's scary. It's dangerous. I'm 106 years old with no family or money. I don't have anything to offer in a relationship."
"And I'm a 35-year-old mutant who spent the last six months in a made-up reality because I couldn't face my losses. Do you think I'm any better?" She countered. "I just thought we could help each other heal since no one else would understand our pain."
"I don't think that's how healthy relationships work."
"Well, not conventional healthy relationships," she smiled sheepishly. "But nothing is conventional in our lives, right?" Her smile diminished. "Unless, of course, you're not interested in a relationship with me. You already said that kiss was a mistake, and--"
Bucky interrupted her by grabbing her face in his hands and kissing her. Her eyes widened in shock before giving in to the intimacy, reciprocating the act with the same intensity. She put her arms around his neck, brushing her hands on his short hair, and he lowered his hands until they reached her waist.
"Sorry," Bucky said after pulling away, panting. Lorna dreaded what could come after. Their first kiss was followed by a similar reaction. "Morning breath," he explained.
Lorna snorted in amusement, caught off guard by the reply. She was definitely expecting another rejection.
"Here." She grabbed the cup of coffee that, at that point, had already turned cold and handed it to him.
Bucky obediently sipped the beverage, followed by a face of disgust.
"Cold," he hissed.
Lorna boldly grabbed his face and kissed him passionately. Their tongues intertwined and fought for dominance, which Lorna gave him. She pushed him back, making him sit back on the couch, and straddled him. Bucky let out a groan.
Eventually, once their bodies demanded oxygen, she separated, pulling his lower lip with her teeth.
"Dammit, Lore!" He sighed.
"It tastes much better," she grinned.
He squinted his eyes and pecked her lips.
"It wasn't a mistake, the kiss," he reassured. "I just freaked out. I felt overwhelmed and pushed you away."
"What about Sarah, though?"
"Sarah?" He lifted an inquisitive eyebrow.
Lorna nodded.
"You seemed pretty interested in her. Comfortable, even. You flirted with her openly. Couldn't take your eyes off her."
Bucky smiled smugly.
"Are you jealous?"
"Well, yeah," she shrugged unashamedly. "I was even jealous of Sharon."
Bucky laughed out loud.
"Sharon? Really?!"
Lorna shrugged again, starting to feel a bit embarrassed by his teasing.
"She treated you with a familiarity I didn't have. It rubbed me the wrong way. I wanted to get close to you, but you wouldn't let me. And yet, you didn't mind her."
His laugh reduced to a soft smile as his arms circled her waist and brought their bodies even closer than they already were.
"I acted like that with Sarah to annoy Sam," he admitted. "And maybe I wanted to mess with you a little. I didn't know she would get all flirty back, which was a very asshole move on my part. I thought she'd brush me off. But I'm gonna apologize and tell her I was just in denial."
"You better," Lorna glared. "She's my best friend. Don't play with her feelings."
The former Sergeant nodded, caressing her hair.
"Yes, ma'am," his eyes shone a sentiment Lorna couldn't discern. "I love the green hair, by the way. It suits you."
"And I love the haircut," she returned, passing her hands through his short hair before resting her forehead against his. "I can see your eyes better."
"Now what?" He asked.
"Well, are we gonna try this?"
"I guess we can," he conceded. "Because, honestly, having Zemo flirting with you also pissed me off."
Her heart soared, and she beamed at him.
Later that morning, Sam got Bucky to help him fix the water pump, but they got caught by Sarah, who scolded her brother for messing with something she told him wasn't the problem.Bucky used that opportunity to talk to her and apologized for flirting with her. Sarah, at first, tried to assure him it didn't bother her, believing that Sam had complained about it. But once Bucky explained he did that to push Lorna away, Sarah got confused.
"I don't understand. I thought you guys got along."
"We do!" He promptly said before composing himself. "We do. I just wasn't ready to admit I actually have feelings for her."
The Wilson sister got taken aback.
"Oh," was all she could say.
"I'm sorry," his eyes lowered. "I didn't mean to lead you on."
"No, no! It's okay!" She reassured, although feeling more disappointed than hurt. "Have you told her?"
The White Wolf hesitated.
"Uh, you better talk to her about that. I gotta go help Sam."
🐺
After lunch, when Bucky and Sam played with the shield in his backyard, Sarah approached Lorna. The green-haired woman replied to a few work emails on her phone and texted back to friends worried about her whereabouts and overall health.
"Hey, girl," Sarah sat beside her friend on the couch.
"Hey, you," Lorna grinned, making her green eyes sparkle with happiness. Sarah knew something happened to make her like that.
"I just talked to Bucky this morning."
Lorna's features sobered up.
"I see."
"He told me to talk to you about him."
"About him?"
"About his feelings," she clarified. "He told me he has feelings for you, but I know you already like someone. I need to understand what's going on."
Lorna nodded.
"It's the least you deserve." She got quiet, gathering her thoughts before beginning. "Well, as you know, I have this roommate of mine." Sarah nodded, motioning her to go on. "And you also know I didn't get to pick who to live with or where to live."
"Yeah, the government wanted to keep a look at you."
"Right. So, they chose to put me with another person they had to keep watch on. It was practical and easier for them. That's how I started living with the former Winter Soldier."
Lorna paused her story to let Sarah process that information.
"Wait a minute," she pled. "You mean Bucky? Do you live with Bucky?"
"Yeah," her voice was quiet but continued before Sarah could question her. "I didn't tell you before because we barely saw each other. I'm never at the apartment unless to bathe or nap. I eat out and spend my free time on the rooftop when I'm not working. We were no more than strangers. It wasn't relevant mentioning."
"Until now," Sarah guessed.
"Until now," Lorna confirmed. "We got tangled in the Flag-Smasher affairs and finally got to interact with each other. He hated me." The black woman snorted. "He totally detested me because he thought I worked with HYDRA."
"And, let me guess, you didn't try to explain yourself."
Sarah knew pretty well how Lorna operated.
"You guessed correctly. I let him misunderstand me," she confirmed. "Mostly because I believed I deserved all the hate. But when he found out I helped him in Wakanda, things began to change, and we kissed."
The brunette gasped.
"What?! Why didn't you tell me that?"
"He pushed me away. He said it was a mistake. That's why I was devastated. And I thought that if something was to happen between you two, you could make each other happy."
"Lorna!" Sarah groaned. "You should've told me before! You let me fawn over the possibility of getting laid with the man you like!"
"I know. I'm sorry! That's why I'm telling you this now. I don't want you to get hurt."
Sarah shook her head.
"I'm not hurt. I guess I was excited about something happening in my life besides worrying about the kids, the finances, and the boat." She sighed.
Lorna pulled Sarah into an embrace.
"Things will get better."
"You don't know that."
"Yes, I do. I'm one hundred percent sure these concerns will pass."
Sarah gave her a suspicious glance.
"Are you planning something?"
Lorna rolled her eyes.
"I admire how much faith you have in me."
"So, now, are you and Bucky a thing?"
"We decided to try."
"Good. You may not believe it, but you deserve it!"