"Are you okay?"
Dani turned and saw Rachel watching her with sympathy.
"Okay is a relative word." Dani's words were dry, but she managed a smile. "I woke up this morning. It's a beautiful day. I get to spend it with my son. I'm grateful."
The two of them stared at one another in front of the mirror inside the church bathroom.
"Okay," Rachel drawled after a long pause like she was trying to decide if Dani was telling the truth or if she was about to fall apart. "I guess you're okay."
"Okay," Dani agreed.
Rachel's lips quirked at the corners.
Dani stared at the woman who was once one of her closest friends. Suddenly, they burst into laughter.
For a moment Dani felt like they'd traveled back in time and were best friends that laughed at moments no one else would find humorous. Life was hard. It was in those quirky moments that she and Rachel and Annie had bonded.
They kept laughing. Tears spilled down their cheeks.
She hadn't just walked away from Josh and Jacob, which was bad enough. Dani had cut ties with the very best friends in the world.
Why?
The answer was swift and sure. She had turned from God and Satan and sifted her like wheat. Just like Simon. Her laughter slowed.
What was that Bible verse? Luke something? She couldn't remember, but Jesus had told Simon that Satan asked to sift all of you like wheat.
When she and Rachel settled down, they were quiet for a long moment while they grabbed tissues to wipe the tears from their eyes and trails of mascara.
Rachel was the first to speak. "Look, I know this is awkward. Let's not pretend it isn't."
"It's awkward, but I'm still ok," she joked and saw Rachel's small smile. "I'm glad we're getting it out in the open. I don't want to pretend either."
Conflicting emotions played on Rachel's face.
"Just say what you need to say," Dani encouraged.
"Meredith is my friend, and I'm happy for her and Josh. I'm sorry if that hurts you." Sympathy or maybe pity flashed in Rachel's eyes.
"I'd prefer your honesty. Thanks for that."
"This isn't how Josh wanted you to find out." Rachel's gaze pinned hers. "He wouldn't do that to you."
"He knew I was meeting you all after church to spend time with Jacob." There was no judgment in Dani's voice just the truth. Despite the rift between them, Josh was a good man. She didn't think he'd be cruel enough to ask her here to witness his marriage celebration.
Last night she'd gotten the idea that he still cared. That maybe there was still a chance for them. How foolish of her.
"None of us knew before this morning," Rachel said. "It was a surprise to us too."
"Really?"
"Yes. I wonder if you coming here—" Rach stopped and her eyes widened.
"You wonder if me coming home prompted Josh to move on with his life," Dani finished for her. "It's possible."
"No one expected you to come inside. You were adamant about your lack of faith in God. You didn't believe in Jesus. Not at all."
"Paul didn't believe in Jesus, not at first," Dani spoke before considering her words and saw Rach's look of astonishment. "I've been reading the Bible."
Without warning Rachel put her arms around Dani. "That's wonderful."
Dani took a deep breath, searching for words. "My mom told me Josh found someone, and he was getting married. Apparently, there was talk of it before today."
"Gossip and witnessing it are two very different things." Rachel pulled back. "I'm really sorry. Truce?"
Dani quickly took her hand, overwhelmed with emotion. "Thank you."
It was a start and Dani was thankful for it. Other women came into the bathroom and while Rachel spoke to some of them Dani slipped out and set her mind to what mattered most—Jacob.
Making her way through the crowd, she searched but didn't see them. Dani kept walking, careful not to make eye contact with anyone and be recognized. She wasn't the most liked person in town, and she'd had enough rejection to last a lifetime. Still, hushed whispers fell around her.
"Is that—"
"It's her!"
"Danielle Christy."
She stiffened. Everyone knew her as Dani Spencer here. Her agent thought Danielle with her middle name, Christy, was more marketable. She'd gone along with it because she had wanted to succeed, and her mother was all for anything that would take them out of the trailer park.
Jennifer would say over and over, "This is our ticket outta here, Danielle."
That was the answer to anything Dani was uncomfortable with, not that she was blaming her mom. It was easy to judge if you'd never gone hungry or had no way to pay bills. Dani understood what motivated her mother and she didn't blame her. She'd made bad choices and they were no one's fault but her own.
Stopping in front of the sanctuary, she saw that Josh, Meredith, and Jacob were still inside talking to Pastor Wyatt. She waited outside, nervous, and sick with regret.
I'm so sorry, God. Take these feelings that do not serve you away. Heal my heart.
"Mom!" Jacob shouted excitedly and started running toward her.
Joy filled Dani's heart and she held out her arms for him. When he reached her his arms went around her waist, and she fell back a couple of steps from his enthusiastic embrace.
"Careful, son. You nearly knocked her down."
Hearing Josh's rich baritone, calm but firm, she looked past Jacob and saw him frowning. Meredith looked upset and Pastor Wyatt appeared shocked. Something in his eyes had her taking a step back. He was staring at her with a strange expression.
Jacob lifted his head, his eyes troubled when they met hers. He looked uncertain. "I'm sorry."
"No harm done. I'm happy to see you too," she said, placing her hand on the back of his head and feeling his soft hair. It was such a little thing, touching his head, but then she'd come to realize that the little things were what mattered most.
Jacob gave her a big smile. "You came."
Hearing the uncertainty in her son's voice, Dani was ashamed of all the times she'd missed. "Nothing could keep me away."
She felt Josh's eyes on her even before she looked up and saw the three of them had come to her and Jacob. Regret, jealousy, and fear churned inside her but she would never let them know. This would be the performance of a lifetime.
"Pastor Wyatt, it's good to see you again." Smiling, she held out her hand.
The Pastor stared another moment before regaining his composure, but it was clear her presence unsettled him. He watched her as if he knew something she did not.
"I'm glad you're home, Dani." He cleared his throat and cast an uncertain look at Josh and Meredith before his attention returned to her. "I wasn't aware you were...visiting."
"Thank you." She felt as if she was missing something. "I'm not visiting. I'm home. Mrs. Huckabee rented her cabin to me. She said she'd try to make services next week."
If she thought it was impossible for Pastor Wyatt to look more thunderstruck, Dani would have been wrong. His jaw parted and eyes widened.
Silence.
Uncomfortable, awkward, silence.
Finally, he forced a smile, their hands still connected in a motionless shake. Reaching out with his other hand he cupped hers, holding it between both of his. "God has answered my prayers. I'm glad to have you back where you belong."
For a moment he'd caught her off guard. She hadn't expected such a warm welcome from Pastor Wyatt but she thanked him and smiled before turning to Meredith and Josh.
"Congratulations." It was all she could manage.
It was Meredith who answered. "Thank you, Dani."
Her gaze flicked to Josh. Betrayal cut deep. She had no right to the emotion, but it came anyway with a vengeance.
He gave her a curt nod. The vein at his temple pulsed. She knew him well enough to know he was upset.
Jacob's voice broke through the tension. "We're all going to spend the afternoon together!"
Pastor Wyatt's expression was horrified. Her questioning gaze flew to Josh's. "We are?"
Josh looked uncertain. "I thought we'd have lunch at The Iron Pit. Everyone is meeting us there."
She knew everyone meant Tanner, Parker, Caleb, and Rachel. How could he expect her to attend his engagement celebration to another woman? Dani wanted to run, but God was helping her endure this.
Feeling four sets of eyes on her, she swallowed her pain. "Sounds fun."
Then she sent up a silent prayer for all that was to come.