Reaction: When their gf skips meals
Genre: Angst, slight fluff
Warnings: subtle mention of eating disorders, body image issues, lots of crying (I apologize)
Word Count: 3435k
Author's Note: I've had this subject in the back of my mind for a while now. A few days ago, I just got into it and thankfully finished today. I want to first credit my friend who helped me come up with scenarios for this lol.
Just a little disclaimer, I wanted to say something for those with poor body image. I feel like you hear that a lot, and you might read more things like "oh I also struggle too," and "please don't feel bad about yourself." When I was working on this, I did write some of the stories based on experience. So I don't have any right to advise on improving your self-esteem or working to have better eating habits. I'd be a hypocrite if I said those things. All I can say is that I know how what self-hatred is like, and how it can take you down some dark paths.
Please stay strong. I am very sorry for how long this note is 😅
~ ~ ~
MARK
His life was going normally, being a workaholic as always. At the same time, he felt more at ease since he was dating you. The other night, you guys went out on a movie date to see the new Black Panther film. It wasn't until near the end of the movie that he noticed the popcorn you bought was barely touched. But knowing your slight dislike for greasy foods, Mark didn't think too much about it.
After dropping you off, he returned to his dorm. He was met by the Dream members who appeared to have been waiting for him. They watched quietly as their leader removed his shoes and took his jacket off.
"Hyung?" Jisung asked cautiously.
"Yeah? What's up?" The Dreamies exchanged looks with each other that he couldn't quite read. Was it uncertainty?
"I don't think he knows," Chenle murmured, causing Mark's brows to furrow in confusion.
"Know what?"
Chenle glanced at his hyung, and back toward the members beside him. But he was going to tell Mark the truth no matter what.
"That (Y/n) collapsed at her university last week."
Mark stepped back, clearly shocked by this news. "What? Why?!"
"Apparently she wasn't eating much," answered Jaemin.
"She's your girlfriend. Didn't you notice something was off?" Haechan's voice raised slightly. As one of your good friends, the singer couldn't help but show his irritation. He knew Mark had been so caught up in work recently. But you've been struggling for a long time now.
Now in distress, Mark ran a hand through his hair as he searched his memory for anything he might've missed. He paused for a moment, remembering the popcorn from earlier. Then he was dashing back out the door, despite it starting to rain.
That was how you heard the sound of your doorbell ringing close to midnight. Luckily you were awake, but you were surprised to see Mark soaking wet. He also looked as if he was about to cry any second.
Despite your befuddlement, you pulled the man inside so he could change into some dry clothes. Mark would bring up to you what the guys told him earlier. At that moment, you began to regret hiding your problems from your boyfriend. You've never seen him so worried before.
You spent the rest of the evening—or morning cuddling in bed. Mark kept repeating how much he loved you and apologized for making you feel like you couldn't come to him. All he sincerely wished for was for you to be happy and healthy. He wasn't going to allow another incident to happen.
✎__________________________________________________________
RENJUN
You had spent nearly an hour getting ready to meet up with Renjun's parents. Seeing them was the first thing on your list for a weekend trip to your boyfriend's hometown. It's been nearly a year since you last met his parents, which made you more nervous than usual.
Renjun's eyes lit up when you finally came out of the bathroom. He instantly recognized the white blouse with a dark blue floral print and the matching blue skirt you were wearing. It was the outfit he bought you not too long ago.
"Wow, you look so pretty!" He exhaled. There was no hiding how taken away he was with you.
Even though you didn't agree with his compliment, you thanked him shyly. Renjun noticed something wasn't quite right pretty fast. The previous times you were about to meet his parents didn't feel like this. But he couldn't pinpoint why things felt strange with you.
Deciding to not dwindle on it, you guys left the hotel to meet up with Renjun's parents at a restaurant. His mother quickly stood up when she spotted you two coming in. While she happily hugged her son, you exchanged greetings with his father.
"It's so nice to see you again, (Y/n)," Mr. Huang smiled warmly.
You bowed your head politely, "Thank you. I'm sorry it's been so long."
Mrs. Huang pulled away from her son to get a better look at you. Her eyes filled with slight concern, and she took your hands. "My Dear, you've gotten skinnier!"
That's what it was. Renjun now knew what he was wondering about earlier. Preoccupied with carrying on a conversation with his mom and dad, you didn't notice how he observed you throughout dinner. He waited until you guys came back to your hotel room to confront you.
"(Y/n), are you okay?"
Your body tensed slightly at his question. "Of course I am. What makes you ask that?"
"It's just—you've become so thin lately. Also, you barely ate anything tonight, and you love Chinese food," He pointed out. "Sweetheart, what's going on?"
Honestly, you felt like you've been playing a game over the past few weeks. Wondering how long you could hide your unhealthy eating habits from Renjun. Of course, it didn't take him very long.
Your eyes dropped to the floor. "Nothing—I just haven't been hungry recently."
"(Y/n)-ah, please don't lie. You have to eat," Renjun chastised.
He walked over to your side and lifted your chin with the tips of his fingers. "Now I know why you've been so tired lately. If you keep this up, you can faint or something worse might happen."
"I'm sorry. I guess, I just wanted to look my best for you and your parents," You admitted, after a short pause.
In return, Renjun pressed his lips against your forehead. "For the record, my parents love you, and so do I. You don't need to change anything about yourself. Especially if your health is at risk."
You melted into his touch, and let yourself sink into his embrace. Renjun was always there to reassure you that you were more than enough for him.
✎__________________________________________________________
JENO
Jeno and you were a newer couple, after having met through mutual friends at university. His major was computer programming, while you studied creative writing. So your schedules were different, but you did share one class.
Your boyfriend was the one to convince you to take dance. Honestly, you were a little reluctant at first. But you ended up signing up for the class to spend more time with him. Since Jeno was more athletic, dancing was a lot easier for him. You...not so much. It was still fun, despite the increasing levels of anxiety the class gave you every week.
One afternoon, you met up after both of your classes finished. That's when he asked to eat lunch together later. Yeah, a typical thing for a just-got-into-a-relationship boyfriend.
You agreed to his sweet offer. But you didn't think when you jokingly added that it felt weird since you usually ate one meal a day. Jeno turned to you in astonishment.
"Eo? Only once?!"
Confused by his reaction, you slowly nodded. "Yeah..."
He stopped walking and moved his hand to your shoulder.
"(Y/n)-ah, that isn't healthy," He lightly scolded.
But you quickly brushed off his concern for your eating habits. You took his hand and dragged him to the school's dance studio. "It's not a big deal, Jeno-ssi. We better hurry, class starts soon."
In spite of Jeno being slightly wary, you seemed to be learning the new dance routine fairly smoothly. That was until you were changing formations and you started to become dizzy. Huffing quietly, you shook your head to dismiss the slow onset of a headache and kept up with the next moves. This feeling was something you were used to whenever you did any intense physical activity.
However, things were different when the room suddenly began to spin. Your legs were the first to give out, shortly after. Wincing, you pressed your knuckles against your forehead. Gasps and words you couldn't process only irritated you more. Fortunately, Jeno rushed to pick you up off the ground and carried you to the health office.
The nurse checked up on you after getting settled. "Did you eat anything today?" She asked.
Jeno couldn't hide a scoff when you told the woman you had. He frowned when the nurse advised you to rest. Once she left, Jeno allowed himself to sigh.
"(Y/n), you need to eat more."
"I-I think I just need rest," You contradicted him.
The boy crossed his arms in persistence. "How can you rest when you have a headache because you don't eat three meals a day?"
His tone softened a bit when he realized how fatigued you were. Lecturing wasn't going to help you in this state. With another sigh, he made his way to the chair you were sitting in.
"Rest for now," He said gently. "I'll bring you something to eat."
Jeno petted your head and pecked you on the lips before dashing out of the room. You waited anxiously for about 17 minutes before your boyfriend came back with assorted types of kimbap. He must've bought some from the nearby stand owned by a halmeoni.
You almost cried when he opened the wrapper and fed you. For the first time, someone showed you that they cared. Though you were both early in the relationship, you couldn't stop yourself from falling deeper for Lee Jeno. Most likely, love.
✎__________________________________________________________
HAECHAN
Due to upcoming exams, you and Haechan spent your Saturday afternoon in the library preparing. Studying on a weekend may not be an ideal date in Haechan's opinion. At the same time, he knew how stressed you got when exam season came around. But that didn't stop him from complaining now and then.
"Aish, I missed breakfast because Jaemin was taking too long," Haechan groaned.
He pouted when he received no response from you. His salty mood prevented him from getting anything done. On the other hand, you were ultra-focused on finishing up an essay for one of your English classes. However, you snapped out of your zone by Haechan's hand tapping on the corner of your laptop.
"Are you hungry too? Did you have breakfast?"
Almost instinctively, you replied to his question with a simple "no." You shook your head when he asked if your roommate was also running late this morning.
"I just forgot," You said absentmindedly.
He watched your eyes flicker back to the computer screen in front of you. It kind of seemed like you wanted to end the conversation quickly. But you couldn't escape your boyfriend that easily.
Then he asked, "How do you forget to eat breakfast?"
The cool expression on your face slowly faded, as you stopped to think for a moment. Lately, finals haven't only been your source of stress. This past month was spent traveling back and forth between Seoul and Pohang to take care of your sick mother. On top of that, you were balancing school life and hiding your problems from everyone. You guessed self-neglect was a result of all that.
Haechan noticed your sudden change and instantly became worried when tears formed in your eyes. He proceeded to reach his hand across the table to take yours.
"(Y/n), is everything okay?"
You promptly clasped your opposite hand over your mouth to muffle your sobs. At least you still had half the mind to cry quietly, remembering you were at a library. Usually, you were the last person to have an emotional outburst. But Haechan's question made you realize how not okay you were.
Fortunately, your boyfriend was quick to act and rushed to your side. His arms wrapped around your shoulders, holding you in a tight embrace that would hopefully calm you down.
A few minutes later, Haechan closed your laptop. "Okay, you're going to stop thinking about school for the rest of the day."
"Hyuck..." You wanted to argue, though you knew he was already standing up and packing your things away.
"You can tell me what's been bothering you over lunch," He added, "Does jjamppong sound okay?"
Haechan had no idea what was causing you to break down, or why you weren't taking care of yourself. But getting you to eat was his priority, and he started by recommending your favorite dish.
Since then, he's become a lot more protective and gone out of his way to take care of you more. Whenever he was down, you were always there to support him. So that's what he was going to do for you.
✎__________________________________________________________
JAEMIN
The first thing he did after getting out of bed looked for you. He was a little sulky that he didn't get to wake up next to you. Especially since he hasn't seen you in one month and two weeks. Jaemin loved his job, but he hated how it also brought this distance in between you two. What made him feel worse was how you never complained. Not even this time, when he showed up at your apartment at one a.m. Instead of scolding him for coming over at such a crazy hour or for walking to your place in the cold, you simply led him into your room to get some much-needed sleep.
Luckily, it didn't take long for Jaemin to find you. He was greeted by one of his favorite aromas when entering the kitchen. And there you were at the counter, carefully pouring a pot of steaming dark liquid into a blue mug. Watching you he realized you had gotten up early to make coffee for him.
As his heart swelled with a dozen emotions, he walked up to stand behind you. Barely startled by his presence, you merely glanced upward to see the tired grin on his face.
"Did you sleep well?" He responded with a delicate kiss on your exposed neck.
His arms circled your waist, gently pulling your back to meet his chest. It was then, did he notice how his girlfriend's waist was practically nonexistent, or in other words, thin. Thinner than usual and definitely not healthy.
Jaemin's smile contorted into a look of concern. Slightly pulling away, he turned to you.
"Jagiya, have you been eating well?" His tone was soft, despite his deep voice.
Automatically, you could tell your boyfriend wasn't speaking in a casual small talk way. Nonetheless, you pretended not to be fazed.
"I've been on a diet..." You set the coffee mug down.
He frowned. "What kind, if you don't mind me asking?"
You cursed in your head, as you hurriedly made up a lie.
"A low-carb diet," You tried your best to sound assertive.
"A low-carb diet or a no-carb diet?"
You froze in place when you noticed the hint of anger in the last part of his question. Jaemin slowly turned you around to face him. "(Y/n), be honest. Have you been eating well?"
Several seconds of silence passed by, as you couldn't even look him in the eye.
"No." There was a catch in your throat, as your lips quivered.
Jaemin brought you back into his embrace when you began to cry. His chin rested on the top of your head, as your tears soaked his shirt. His heart broke at the sound of your sobs. All he could do was press kisses into your hair, and pat your back.
You sniffed, "I just...I just see pictures of us, and I hate how I look when you're so perfect."
"(Y/n)-ah..."
"I know it sounds stupid. But I want to be a girlfriend who is also beautiful."
Jaemin cupped the right side of your face and sighed, "(Y/n)-ah, you've always been beautiful to me. You don't need to lose weight or do anything else to prove that."
As comforting as his words were, Jaemin knew that it would take more than that to make you feel better. From then on, he didn't miss a chance to shower you with compliments and affection. He loved you and had no problem making sure you believed that.
✎__________________________________________________________
CHENLE
You were currently on opposite sides of the room. Chenle was watching Instagram videos on his phone, and you were writing the next chapter to a story you started a while ago. This was agreeably considered hanging out with each other. Doing your own thing until someone broke the silence. And this time, it was Chenle.
His stomach growling did not go ignored by him. Naturally, he pulled up a delivery food app. He then paused and looked over to you who was typing away on your computer.
"(Y/n)-ahhh, I'm ordering food. What do you want?"
"I don't know," You replied, without looking up.
Chenle sat up in his spot on the couch. "Do you want tteokbokki?"
"Um, I'm not in the mood for tteokbokki." He saw your head shake behind the computer.
"Jokbal?"
"Haechan will be upset if we eat that without him."
"How about tonkatsu?"
"Eh..."
"Okay, what about-"
Losing concentration, you shut your laptop in frustration. "I'm not hungry! Just order something for yourself."
"I want to eat with you though," He whined. You closed your eyes for a moment and sighed before starting to speak again.
"But—"
"No buts. You're going to come here and help me choose something."
Just as you opened your mouth to protest, Chenle already decided he had enough. He lifted you from your chair which earned him an "are you crazy?" look. Then he brought you to where he was previously sitting. While doing so, he noticed that you were very light.
"How are you not hungry?" Chenle asked. "Your stomach is practically crying out to me."
You wrapped your arms around your waist self-consciously. "You're exaggerating, Chenle."
Even though you made it sound like not a big deal, Chenle had a feeling there was an underlying problem here. He knew that you had a small appetite, but having no desire to eat was separate. For someone who was such a big foodie, the idea of his girlfriend starving herself worried him.
"We haven't had a meal together in so long," Chenle pretended to sulk. "But if you really don't want to eat, I won't force you."
Ugh, you just couldn't resist the rare look of sadness on the boy's face. He knew you hated to be guilty.
So with a sigh, you slowly made a new suggestion. "Actually...maybe we can get tteokbokki. Can we just share the bowl?"
As if he wasn't moping a second ago, Chenle smiled and wrapped his arm around your shoulders. "Of course. Anything for you, Cutie."
✎__________________________________________________________
JISUNG
He sat patiently in the lobby, waiting for you who was at a doctor's appointment. You insisted this was nothing but a normal check-up. But that didn't stop Jisung from accompanying you. He stood up in slight surprise when you came out earlier than expected.
"(Y/n)-ah! You're done?" You bobbed your head and grabbed his hand with a small smile.
Jisung noticed you were being quieter than usual during the drive to your place. But he thought you might be tired from a long day of classes before having to visit the doctor's office. You'd probably feel better when you got back home.
Once you guys arrived, Jisung was left alone when you went to change into more comfortable clothes. As he plopped down on your small couch, his eyes darted to the medical papers you had previously left on the coffee table. Out of habit, Jisung picked up the papers to organize them.
However, your recorded weight on the first page caught him off guard. His eyes widened in horror at the number. He knew you were small, especially compared to his size. But he didn't think you were underweight to the point that it was dangerous. This must've been why you barely said anything earlier.
Tears flooded his eyes in an instant when he saw you walk out of the room. Suddenly confused as to why your boyfriend was crying, your lips parted to ask what was wrong. Then you spotted the slightly crumpled papers in his hands.
"Jisung—I can explain," You spoke calmly, in an attempt to keep your voice stable.
Jisung looked at you in despair. "Is this why I haven't seen you eat lately? Or how you don't want to go shopping together anymore?"
Your confirmed silence made him feel worse. Regardless he rushed up to hug you, engulfing your small frame into his taller figure. The two of you stayed in that position for a long time. Your fingers stroked his back as you also tried to calm him down. You made sure to reassure him that you knew you had a problem and were going to try to build better eating habits. Jisung would offer any support he could give you.
✎__________________________________________________________