Season 4 : Chapter 5
Kei Karuizawa POV
Alright. Today is the day, I guess. A huge part of my facade ends today which would result in the freedom and the emotional welfare of not just a part of me, but a lot of other students as well.
Today, I'll break up with Hirata-kun and free him from this unnecessary burden.
I still vividly remember the day that I 'confessed' to him. At first, I never cared about him. The only reason I decided to approach him in the first place was because of his handsome face and his great personality.
The moment Hirata-kun introduced himself, I knew that he was the one. He will be the Leader of this Class and will be the one to represent us to other classes. I came to realise the fact that, he was, without a shadow of my doubt, the one who could protect me from my past catching up.
That's why, when Ayanokouji declared on the first day that he wanted to be the Leader of Class-D, I was the very first person to protest against him. If I was completely honest, it didn't matter to me whether Hirata-kun or Ayanokouji became the leader ...
But I also knew of the fact that most of the girls would take an already popular Hirata-kun's side over a less popular Ayanokouji. So before anyone could protest, I started the propaganda against him with my brazen, raspy, gyaru-like voice just to show that I had the most vocal power among all the girls and that I won't put up with any of his shit.
I acted towards him exactly like how my oppressors acted against me at first. I felt a lump of bile rise in my throat but I didn't break my facade. In a way, I couldn't. Because I knew that in order to protect yourself from others, you can't be the meek, helpless person that you once were.
That night, I told Hirata-kun about my entire past. About all the different ways I was tortured day in and day out. How I was slapped, kicked, punched, cu-
No ..... I don't want to remember that day. My hand slowly went towards my waist as I visibly cringed at the sensation of the wound I was feeling with my hand.
That day, hearing my story, it was as if he experienced something similar in any way, I saw Hirata-kun tearing up at my story, before he accepted the proposal of being my 'Boyfriend' where he will use his social power and get along with everyone, while I leech of his popularity like a fucking leech and cling to him everywhere I go.
In a way, all those months, I felt utterly disgusted with my pathetic attempts at grasping at any hints of relevancy I could, while being the spoilt, rough-mouthed, 'beautiful', harsh 'girlfriend' of the kind, handsome, nice Hirata Yosuke.
I knew that none of my classmates actually liked me, and I mean why should they.... All this time, I acted like nothing but an absolute bitch to them .... but for me it was fine, as long as I was safe.
Or that's what I thought..... The day where I had an actual conversation with Ayanokouji for the first time, I realised just how delusional I actually was all this time.
This 'fake' persona of mine made others dislike me already, which might result in creating future enemies. Hirata-kun was someone who never believed in violence or never wanted to ...
And as a person who has been subjected to violence for most of her life, I knew very well that not every situation can be dealt with peace. So I couldn't just rely on Hirata-kun for my safety. I needed to learn how to rely on myself.
It's quite a difficult task I won't lie, but Ayanokouji and Horikita-san did help me everyday after class where they taught me a lot of things, and I would lie if I don't feel a little cool hanging out with the smart students without my facade.
I felt a little relieved to know that there are people who wouldn't ostracise me because of being weak ... The time I spent with the two of them felt .... peaceful.
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"Good evening, Karuizawa-san. Are there any problems?"
Hirata soon walked into an empty hallway where his 'girlfriend' was waiting for him. As soon as their eyes met, Karuizawa let out a small smile, before bowing in front of him, bewildering Hirata at her sudden gesture.
"Eh? What are you doing Karuizawa-san?"
"I am extremely thankful for all your help these last few months, Hirata-kun. However, I came to realise that if all I do is cling by your side for my own good, I wouldn't be able to develop myself further, and would be the same weak and selfish Karuizawa Kei, who gets trampled by others. "
"Karuizawa-san .... What're you talking about?"
Hirata's eyes widened a little at hearing her words, which made Karuizawa's stomach churn a little in guilt as she realised that her fear was turning out to be true.
Her words sounded like she was using him and disposing of him of her free will .... which made the situation worse, since it was true in its own twisted way.
However before the situation could escalate into something worse, or get filled with any other misconception or misunderstanding, Karuizawa didn't wait for Hirata to continue and stated her piece.
"That's why I want to end this false 'relationship' of ours, since because of me, you also can't interact with others freely of your own will. I am extremely thankful for all your help, and I am sorry if my words make it sound like I am disposing of you as if I took everything you did for me as granted, because that's clearly not the truth. B-but I—"
Karuizawa couldn't finish her sentence as her guilt caught up to her heart and a horrid bile rose in her throat.
"I see, I'm very happy to hear that Karuizawa-san."
"Huh?"
With a dubious expression on her face, Karuizawa raised her head only to see a small, pleasant smile on her 'ex-boyfriend' Hirata's face as he lightly placed his hand on her shoulder.
"I'm really happy to hear that you are trying to move on from your past, instead of bottling it in and having it control your present. You see, unlike you I still couldn't achieve that, as I live with the guilt of horrific memories of my past, and I can't bring myself to look ahead. But seeing you do this makes me really happy. I'm proud of you."
"Hirata-kun ....."
With slightly teary eyes, Karuizawa looked at Hirata with a dazed look on her face as he gently wiped the tears with his handkerchief.
"Also you don't have to feel guilty in the slightest. I never felt that you were in any way using me, got that? If protecting yourself is categorized as 'using' then in that sense I was also using you in order to cope with my 'self guilt'. No matter what, in the end we are classmates and friends. We should always look out for one another right?"
Hirata gently patted Karuizawa's head as drops of tears started falling on the ground, before Karuizawa enveloped Hirata into a tight hug, surprising the greenish-blonde haired boy.
"Thank you so much. Thank you so much for everything you did for me. I will always be grateful to you. I'll forever be indebted to you."
"Yes Yes. I told you before, right? As friends, we should always look out for one another. So you should never feel like you owe anything to me, alright?"
"........."
"Anyways, so should we reveal to all of our classmates about our break up now? Or should we do it later?"
"I think we should do it now. There's no need for you to have me clinging around you for no reason and taking your well deserved freedom away from you, anymore."
'Hopefully after this Kokoro-san or Mii-chan gets enough confidence to say what's on their mind.'
"Very well. Just know one thing, Karuizawa-san. Even though we are not 'couples' anymore, I care about you just as much as I care about every single one of my classmates. So if you ever find yourself in any trouble, don't hesitate to ask for my help, okay?"
Karuizawa nodded to Hirata's words with a small relieved smile on her face.
"That makes me feel glad. I was scared that after this, there might be an air of awkwardness among the both of us."
"Haha that should never be the case. Anyways, is there anything else you wanted to say, or was this all?"
"Oh, wait a second please. I need to give you something."
"Give me something? What is it?"
"Just wait for a bit."
Giving him not any appropriate response, Karuizawa walked away from Hirata out of the hallway for a couple seconds, before walking back inside with a moderately sized pink coloured box covered in a beautiful red glittered wrapping paper.
"Umm, I don't know if it's appropriate enough, but I wanted to give you something in return as a compensation for all your troubles putting up with me for all this time."
All Hirata could do was let out a tired chuckle at her antics.
"As I told you before, I did it because we were friends. There's no need for any gifts in the first plac-"
"No! Just take it will you?! If we consider each other as friends, then take this as a token of appreciation."
Without waiting for any response, Karuizawa shoved the box in Hirata's hands before sprinting out of the halls in hurry, resulting in the blonde haired boy releasing a small chuckle.
"That girl .... I told her it's not necessary."
Covering the pink coloured box inside his jacket, Hirata started walking back towards his room in a concealed manner, not wanting any of his classmates to see him with a suspicious box in his hands.
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After quietly walking through the halls as if he was a wanted criminal, Hirata soon walked inside his hotel room, where he was greeted by the odd sight of two of his quite 'unique' roommates playing jigsaw puzzle together.
"Fu~ That's the wrong piece, Kiyo-boy. My perfect intuition is telling me that this piece will attach towards that corner instead of this one."
"What are you talking about? You are telling me to attach the tail of the male cat right beside the posterior of the female one? What kind of sicko are you?"
"That's not being called a sicko, Kiyo-boy. As a perfect being, one should always experiment with different things in order to get better results and strive for more 'perfectness' Ha ha ha ha."
All Hirata could do was smile in amusement at the antics of his two weird yet very talented roommates.
"Good evening Ayanokouji-kun, Koenji-kun."
"Salutations, pretty boy. I assume your date went well?"
"Haha it was not a date, Koenji-kun. But yeah, I enjoyed my time."
"Good evening Hirata. Did you have dinner yet?"
"Hmm, not yet."
"Ken, Akito, Hideo and I were planning to have dinner together, while this fellow over here included himself in our group as well. Want to join us?"
Kiyotaka looked at Hirata with a curious expression on his face, while pointing his finger at a laughing Koenji.
"You shouldn't say it like that, Kiyo boy. The fact that I am even letting you all experience my magnificence, you should be grateful for that instead of disrespecting me by pointing your fingers. However I would pardon this gesture of yours this time, since I hold you in such high regard."
"... Sure, I guess. So, what's your answer Hirata?"
'Ever since the day my highschool started, all the time I ate with the girls which resulted in me not being able to connect and interact with my male classmates that much. So, in a way this is a good opportunity for me to be free from all the love talk and gossip and just enjoy my time with the boys...... This sounds like a good time.'
As if he made up his mind, Hirata nodded at Kiyotaka's words with a smile on his face.
"Sure."
"Very well. I'll let the others know about your inclusion."
Hirata sat on his bed while he kept nervously fiddling with the pink box in his hands, not knowing what to expect inside. Kiyotaka, who was observing him with a curious look, soon sat down beside him with an impassive expression.
"A gift from one of your admirers?"
"Haha, you could say so."
"I see. Well, I won't interrupt your private time. I'm taking a small nap. Can you wake me up within an hour?"
"Sure."
Kiyotaka slumped on his bed tiredly as Hirata looked at him with sympathy as the boy in front of him worked tirelessly for the sake of the class.
'If it's anyone who deserves any kind of rest the most, it's you Ayanokouji-kun.'
Steeling himself, Hirata then looked back at the box before opening it gently, not wanting to destroy any content which was inside it.
The first thing that popped out of the box was a small letter, under which there was a lunchbox which was emitting the aroma of a freshly baked cake.
As Hirata picked up the lunchbox, he discovered a small cute panda key-chain lying in the corner of the box.
Hirata opened the letter and started reading it.
'Sorry for walking away from you like that. Take this gift of mine as a token of gratitude for all the troubles you had to put up with ....
This was my first time cooking anything. But with the help of one of my friends, I somehow finished making this cake. So, if it's not to your liking, I apologise in advance :).
Also, you've never told me what you liked. So I just took the recommendation of one of my friends on what you would like .... And all he said was "Get him anything Panda related. One could never go wrong with Pandas." So yeah, it's not my fault if you don't like the present :(
Jk Jk.
I hope we continue to be the best of friends and if you require any help in the future, don't hesitate to call me for help, not like I can do much though xD.
—Karuizawa Kei'
With a happy smile on his face, Hirata picked up the keychain with an amused expression while he took a small bite of the freshly baked fruit cake.
'This is a wonderful gift, Karuizawa-san. I love it very much.'
End of Chapter 82
Words : 3332
It took quite a while to finish this chapter and still I feel quite unsatisfied by it. Well, Kei and Hirata interactions are kind of hard for me to write, but I tried my best.
Hope you guys enjoyed the chapter. See ya.
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