"Because at some point you have to realize that some people can stay in your heart but not in your life and this is my way of keeping you in my heart." ― Sandi Lynn
Please Vote
Comment
And Follow me ...
................................
NIKKI POV
Morrison's Estate
As soon as Alex's back disappeared through the door with the door slammed shut, my eyes flooded as my emotions finally caught up with me. My shoulder was shaking as I cried my heart out. I knew it, this time, it's over. My world collapsed and I don't know how to start again. I didn't regret that we made love, but I despise myself for letting my flesh win over reason.
He was right when he called me a whore. I know he's engaged but I let it happen.
I slowly carried my limbs to the washroom and climb in the shower, with a growing hollowness in my heart. Turning the water tap on while adjusting the water temperature, with a floating brain. I turned the shower on when the water felt just the right temperature.
I let the water runs through my face washing the hesitant stream trickling down my cheek. Things just got worst.
Great Nicki! You just did the worst step to success!
The tears seem endless as another torrent of tears streams down my face, falling like the raging water of the Niagara Falls. I sob with pity for myself. I have lost everything. Even my dignity is gone. There's nothing to be proud off. Nothing.
"Lord, please give me more strength to finish this trials you have bestowed to me with head held high..." I mumbled barely a whisper. At this moment, I thought it's him that only I could trust.
I let the tears kept streaming until there's nothing left. When I thought I cried it all out, I step out of the shower and quickly dried myself. I pulled a gray paired of pajamas and blow dry my hair. I unplugged it the machine when my hair is all dry, placing it back on the vanity top drawer where all my other things for my hair were stored.
I quickly crawled into my bed and I smell his scent left on my covers. I saw the blood that reminds me that I've given the most precious thing I've kept for a long time. I'm no more a virgin, not anymore! I didn't regret it.
I pulled the covers away and tossed it on the chair barely landed on it and got out of the bed and pulled another bed covers in my drawers where my bed accessories are stored.
Soon, I'm lying on my bed but sleep was elusive. I shut my eyes harshly as the memories of him kissing me flooded my skull once again, taunting me to the brink. I could still feel his lips all over my body. I tossed and turned trying to block all the memories a little while ago, but sleep had abandoned me. And the more I tried to forget it, the more it keeps taunting me.
It's almost three as my clock says when I finally drifted to sleep.
A loud ring of my cell phone woke me up. I tried to sleep through it but each second it sounds annoying. I check on my bedside clock and it's passed one in the afternoon.
I bolted upright when I realized I have a work. WHAT? Oh God, no, I'm screwed. I palmed my face in frustrations, and disappointment.
When I attempted to jump off my bed, I felt my whole body sore, especially my lower part. I feel like I was punched all over my body especially my hips.
CRAP! I grimaced.
I heard my phone rang again. I quickly walk out my living room ignoring the soreness of my body and my sex as I winched occasionally when that slight pain shooting in my core, looking for my goddamn cell phone and found it sitting on the coffee table. I don't understand why it is set to loud.
I connected the call without looking whose calling.
"Yes?" I asked brusquely without preamble. My mood is not really helping me today.
"Hi, Nicki, It's Colton! Just wondering why you didn't show up today? I went to see you and Alex were brooding so I didn't ask him, I thought I call you myself." he ranted ceremoniously ignoring my rude tone.
I don't know why I felt he's getting annoying now. "I'm sorry, I wasn't feeling well." I lied, kicking away the bad spirit trying to eat me whole.
"Oh ..." he sounds so disappointed and I felt remorse of my feelings about him. "Do you need anything? Is it worse? I can take you to the doctor," his worried timbre just made me feel nothing but remorse. He's been acting nicely to me and always thinking how to cheer me up and here I am not even grateful for his kindness. I'm really a bad person.
"I'm feeling better now," I said in a much happy tone laced with conviction.
"Great! Do you think you can escort me tonight?" he asked hopefully.
I guess I need to pay back his kindness. "Sure, but may I ask where so I know what should I wear?" I chuckled.
"To a wedding anniversary. One of my close friend's parents' Anniversary," he explained briefly with his excited voice.
"What time would you pick me up then so I could get ready?" I asked nonchalantly. I think a party would be a good diversion. Maybe drink into oblivion would be a good idea to numb this crazy emotion etched in my heart and just go to sleep straight without thinking.
It's odd, the boss didn't call me and growled at me in the morning to show up. It's better that way. I'm not ready to face him, just yet. I still am planning their wedding, I hope they will change their mind and just pay someone to plan theirs. I don't know if I can handle that now. I don't know if I could control my emotions after what happened.
I quickly made my way to the kitchen and ventured through my fridge to see what to make for my lunch. Soon I was busy cooking.
After lunch, I settled on the couch and entertained myself by watching TV as I nibbled some chips. This is better than thinking about him. I know, I look like a desperate fool. Sulking over the crazy decision I've made.
After several shows, my eyes searched for the watch on the wall and it's almost three. I'm getting bored and I felt like going out for a walk to relax my head. My eyes were trained on the screen, but my head had been working like a clock, wandering somewhere, where that devil is.
I quickly carried my limbs off the couch and headed for my room, then take a shower. After a quick shower, I wore tight black yoga pants and a white fitted tee shirt with a pair of sneakers. I pulled a sling bag out of my closet where I kept my purses and stuffed my phone and wallet.
Soon enough, I'm outside joining the crowd walking here and there. The weather is nice. It's still considered as Spring. The summer is around the corner.
I was walking and passed by a salon. The poster posted on the glass window wall of the salon met my eyes and the hair style captured my attention. It was short, a few inches before her shoulder, straight bob cut. It looks fiercer and elegant. Timeless look. I find it so beautiful, sassy, and sexy. I have a long hair for a long time and I think cutting it shorter would be a good change.
I walk into the salon with a broad decisive smile.
*****
ALEX POV
I felt enraged the whole time I'm in the office. I know why she didn't show up today and I won't bother her. I'm not ready to see her yet after last night. I had thought about everything and I think I'm ready to let her go. I will talk to Annabel to pay someone to plan our wedding instead of her. It's easier that way.
It's easy to say it but my it's hard to do.
Mierda!
It's almost seven. I've been here since five this morning. I was drunk last night but I managed to get home. I'm glad I wasn't pulled over by a cop for drunk driving. I woke up early and thank God, not a bad headache.
I cleaned my desk and turned off my computer. I grab my suitcase and started walking out the door. Just like my old routine. I involuntarily glance at her desk on my way out before heading straight to the elevator. Shortly, the elevator door slides open and I stepped in. I punch the lobby button and the lift jolted moving down. Minutes later, the elevator jolted to stop and it slides open. I briskly walked out heading outside the building and as soon as Rodrigo saw me, he opened the door.
We arrived at my place less than twenty minutes. I quickly took a shower and got changed. I'm already late. I should be there at seven. I still have to pick Annabel.
I was heading out my room when I heard my phone ringing. I walked straight to the living room and pick my keys together with my phone.
"Hi," I said as soon as it connected.
"Hey, babe! Where are you?" Annabel's sweet voice nags.
"I'm coming," I replied shortly as I headed for the door.
"Okay, see you later then," she replied sweetly. After the proposal, she became sweet and soft. Her bitchy side was slowly diminishing.
"Yes," I responded briefly and ended the call. I locked my door and headed back to the elevator.
*****
NIKKI POV
I need to leave this place and move back to my dad's place. For some reason, Alex's scent was lingering in my room. I could smell him all over the place. It's suffocating and making my breathing constricted as our lovemaking kept replaying in my head every chance it could get.
I quickly walk out of my bedroom and pace back and forth to the living room. The soreness wasn't that bad anymore so as the sore in my sex except when I pee I could feel the sting.
After ransacking my closet to find something to wear, I stumbled with a pink shade sequined Armani Prive dress with very dramatic low back cut. Looking lovely and sparkly.
I wore this once on a gala two years ago back home when I was still working as an actress. Paired it with nude pumps. With my new hairstyle, straight bob cut, just above my shoulder, I look completely different. I was so scared it might look ugly, but I was relieved when some people in the salon poured me with compliments.
The mirror reflects a more alluring and fiercer Nikki, not a hint of innocence.
After like a decade, a loud knock on my door. I quickly snatched my clutch and keys from the couch and walked to the door. I opened the door revealing Colton smiling widely, but hen gradually morphs into a shocked. His jaw slacked and eyes almost popping out of its socket.
"Oh my God, Nikki. Is that you?" he exclaimed with his eyes bulging. "I didn't recognize you!" he commented as his eyes skim me up and down. "You look more desirable than before. I love your new hairstyle. It looks more sexy and fierce," he added on. His tone held so much admiration.
I stared at him sheepishly. "Thank you," I smiled feeling conscious all of a sudden, and relief flooded me washing all the negative feelings crawling in my gut when I saw his shocked face. My eyes skim him discreetly. "You don't look bad as well, Colton." I smiled and step forward to lock the door. He just waves it off.
Shortly, we are walking to his BMW waiting on the side of the road. He opened the door for me and I climbed in and buckled myself. He closed the door beside me as soon as I'm settled, rounding to the driver seat and slide in swiftly.
He started the engine and smiled at me before he revved emerging with the busy road. It feels like forever, and finally, he parked in front a big nicely done ironworks tall gate. The Mansion stood proudly in the middles of the vast estate. The owner probably is filthy rich, I thought.
I felt like I don't belong here. I'm lost. Colton grabs my hand and squeezes it to reassure it's fine. The guard open the gate after he saw Colton's invitation card. Colton pulled in into an endless curvy concrete driveway to the Mansion. We passed by a long fountain. It was beautiful with the lights coming from the scattered landscape lamp post, reflecting the grass and different flowers with different hues, beautifully decorated half part of the property
Then, we reached the front porch where two white pillars and two lions were sitting facing each other just before the pillars. Colton quickly walked to my side and opened the door for me as he assisted me out of the car. I hold his extended arm and like a gentleman, he was very careful to my footstep. He gave the keys to the valet and we entered the door. A beautiful lady and a handsome guy with the same age as my father I believe, was smiling at the entrance greeting the guest. I stood there frozen when I realized who she was.
Hailey Morrison?
Realization struck me like a lightning and it's too late to retreat.
So, he's here too?
I was too focused on my thoughts that I didn't realize we are already facing them, standing a few inches in front of them.
Hailey stood there, looking flabbergasted. Her smile withered with her beautiful eyes widened in surprised, but promptly recollected herself and greeted Colton, with her smile making its way back up to her lips.
"Hi Colton darling, thanks for coming!" she smiled sweetly at him and Colton gave her a kiss on her cheeks. She looks stunning in her green sleeveless shimmery chiffon long gown. Colton just shook the old Morrison's hand as he congratulate them. I was giving them a forced smile, tight smile that I felt like my lips are glued to my jaws.
"Aunt Hailey, uncle Max, this is Cara Nicole Rivas," Colton proudly introduced me. The guy looked stunned but composed himself just as quickly as his brows furrowed.
"Nicki, this is aunt Hailey and uncle Maximillian Morrison. Today is their 28th Anniversary," Colton explained, smiles plastered all over his face.
Hailey smiled at me sweetly, but there's a tinge of guilt and sadness in her eyes. She pulled me for a hug. I was startled but managed to hug her back forcing myself to show the nice trait. My mom would be so proud of me. I learn this other characteristic, like a fake bitch when I work in the showbiz industry for a while.
"It's nice meeting you, Nicki," she said softly while hugging that I thought I misheard it. She pulled away and her husband kissed my cheeks, and kind of felt his hands are cold. I think he recognized me.
With a forceful smile, we left them and joined the other guest. Colton looks on our table and I was very disappointed when he led me to where the two pair I have been avoiding, was sitting. I'm surprised to see Jeremy, Frederick, and Nicolas and with Mara. The anxiety building up in my system suddenly washes over. I was so happy. I'm glad I have someone to talk to and don't feel outcast.
*****
ALEX POV
I was so stunned to see her, in her new haircut. She looks totally different. Fiercer and not the innocent Nicki I know. I swigged my beer in one gulped. I remembered the "wanton Nicki". Suddenly, the memories of our lovemaking flooded my head. Her moaning my name and writhes under my gaze, my touch. I forced to slammed back down the memories of us together.
This time, I really need a stronger drink.
I can't deny it. My eyes even have its own mind, it kept traveling to her direction.
She looks so stunning and hot in her sparkling pink shade dress with very dramatic low back cut.
I saw my friends gave her a tight hug which I wish I could do. I was so jealous of them they could do it without inhibitions. Mara was so excited. She looks so bored while ago and now she looks suddenly alive.
Nikki sat just across us beside Mara, and Colton took the seat beside her. She looks so happy with him.
I grab a flute of champagne from the tray when a waiter passed by. I tried not to look at their direction. I could feel my muscles tightening from rage and jealousy. All my muscles tensed as the memories of her last night flooded my skull once again, taunting me.
*****
NIKKI POV
Dinner is done and the couple thanks the guest for coming to share the moment with them. They seemed to be very happy. No signs of the betrayal and lies in the past. I clenched my hands. After their long speech, Alex stood up and proposed a toast to his parents' 28th years of love and happiness. Everyone raises their glasses and seconds later clicking of glasses echoed around the grand foyer of the mansion where the party was held.
He looks tipsy, already. I looked away and hold back the urge to look at their direction. He seemed of ignoring me so I did the same.
Everyone was already dancing. Alex and Annabel soon joined the guest on the dance floor.
Then Nicolas and Mara joined in. Colton asked me and I delightedly accepted. They are all having fun why can't I?
Shortly, Colton was holding my hand to the dancing floor. We danced to the music so close together. I was trying to just enjoy myself and forget where I was and the people around me to numb the mixed feelings I felt, that I didn't see Alex's darkening eyes boring at us, but it didn't miss Colton's eyes. He saw how Alex threatening eyes staring furiously at us, but he didn't say anything.
The night went by smoothly without me bumping into him. He was avoiding me and I felt hurt but I ignored the pain and ignored his presence as well. I know it sounded easy, but trust me, there are things that you can't avoid, and this is one of it. Hurt comes with loving someone. It's inevitable.
Colton was so quiet when he drove me home. The silence was deafening throughout the time. I didn't bother to make a conversation as I felt exhausted from pretending to be happy even if I wasn't. I kind of even feel like I have a locked jaw. After forcing to glue that fake smile on my face showing to everyone I was okay, I'm happy. Colton didn't bother to make a conversation either. I guess he felt that I'm not in the mood, and I was glad he didn't bombard me with questions.
After he dropped me off he left without a word and I noticed he wasn't smiling anymore. Did I hurt him or said something that hurt him? I don't remember I said something that could possibly hurt his feelings.
I shrugged it off as I felt the exhaustion is kicking in. I quickly undress and took a quick shower. It was two in the morning when I finally hit the bed. As soon as my back hit the covers, sleep engulfed me.
*****
ALEX POV
Tomorrow is my wedding and I'm still working like crazy. I don't want to think about the wedding that's why I decided to work my ass off. Nicki stops working after that party at my parent's house. I called her and told her I accepted her resignation. The next day, I told my lawyer to turned the property back to the old Rivas.
My lawyer was surprised and I know he disapproved the idea but he didn't say anything which I'm glad. I wasn't paying for him to question my decision.
It's almost a month since our lovemaking and until now it's still reeling in my head, in my whole system and it frustrates me all the more.
I found out after a week that Nicki moved back to his dad's place and from then I heard nothing. From then on, my life went from white to black and I was a walking robot, with no emotions.
*****
NIKKI POV
Today is Alex's wedding day. Mara just called me to assure I'm okay. I just said yes, but I'm not. Dad is in his office doing some paper works. The hotel was given back three weeks ago after he called me he accepted my resignation and I don't have to come in. I was so happy but sad at the same time. I know he can't wait to get rid of me since he got what he wants from me.
I felt that weird feeling again. It's been two weeks since I started vomiting in the morning. I felt so sick and nauseous. All I want is sleep and eat. I felt so lazy, which is odd. Dad told me to go to the doctor but I insist not. I hate doctors and needles. I thought I might have eaten something bad, or I just feel tired after dealing with him for the past months.
I look on the time it's almost ten. I went through my phone and saw Mara's text. A picture of the four of them. Alex, Jeremy, Nicolas, and Frederick, all looking handsome in their tuxedos. Nicolas looks so handsome in his white tuxedo.
I didn't realize I was already crying. I threw the phone on the wall and pick up my car keys. I run, walk to the garage and slid into my old Aventador. Whenever I'm sad, driving like a racer would always relax me.
I started the engine and revved it before hitting the gas and out of the garage. I saw my dad ran out of the house calling me as I pass by him to the gate.
He knew I wasn't feeling well and sometimes he insist that I was neglecting my health because of him. I told him everything except the part where we made love. He knew my feelings for him.
I sped out of the driveway and into the street emerging into the busy road and step on the gas not caring about the other drivers yelling at me furiously as I overtake them,
The smiling face of Alex flashed through my head and I felt the tears like a river, endlessly cascading over my cheeks, down to my shirt. That familiar pain doubled. It felt like a sharp dagger just struck me in the heart, twinge it painfully, over and over again.
Fresh tears kept coming until my eyes were too blurry and couldn't clearly see the road. My other hand kept wiping every fresh tear, but then it kept coming. In a blur, I missed a Honda minivan merging into my lane. The SUV hit the front side of my car hard. I felt my whole body jerk and my head smashing into the steering wheel. I tried to keep awake as I heard the loud screeching of tires, harsh sound of metal hitting metal, but seconds later, my head suddenly swims and an overwhelming dizziness whacked me. I battled with darkness but I'm not strong enough as a waves of pain shot me, everywhere of my body. I heard muffled blaring sirens but it all went blank, and I completely thrown into an oblivion of darkness.
*****
Thank you, everyone. PLEASE DON'T FORGET TO VOTE!!!