Elias Salazar
Saturday.
Who doesn't love Saturdays?
People who love being productive that's who.
Anyways- back to your regularly scheduled programming.
It's only been about two-ish days since Alex and Mateo came to stay with us for a bit and personally- I'm loving it.
I love it when she's in her 'room' and I randomly come up behind her for a hug, I love it even more when she leans into my hold and rubs my arms that are wrapped around her middle.
I love it when she's in my room and she lets me cuddle her. I fucking love it when she lays her head on my chest and when she snuggles into my body. For some reason, she only does that when I have the blanket on top of us, so I get cuddles and warmth.
I've been in heaven.
But the one thing I love the most was when I came into her 'room' and she ended up coming into bed with me.
(Flashback)
My fist punches the pillow repeatedly and I dig my face into it to find some comfort.
Goddamit- what the hell is wrong with me?!
I've been trying to go to sleep for the past hour and I just can't. I've tried hugging a pillow, I've tried numerous sleeping positions, I even tried doing what Angelica does where I put a pillow between my legs.
It didn't work.
I groan loudly and flip my body to the right side, looking away from my door.
I put my arm under the pillow and grab a different one to hold close to me with my left arm. I nuzzle my head into the pillow and sigh.
Okay, maybe I can sleep now.
One minute goes by.
Three minutes go by.
Five fucking minutes go by.
Ten fucking- fuck this.
I groan and whine childishly and throw the blanket over and off my body, my feet hitting the floor with a loud thud and I huff in frustration. I grab my phone on the nightstand and check the time. 11:46. She has to be awake.
I rub my eye with the heel of my palm to wake up my eyes seeing as how they were closed for so long in my pathetic attempt at sleep and I head out of my room and make my way downstairs.
The room she's staying in is only a few feet awake from my parents, so I have to tiptoe a bit before I get to her. I cross the carpet floors with ease and I finally reach her door.
Maybe I can get some sleep this way.
I slowly turn the knob and creak the door open slightly, knowing that even if she is awake, Mateo probably isn't.
The bed comes into view and I was right. Mateo sleeps soundly on his stomach and my girl is cuddled up behind him, her arm draped over his back and she uses her other arm as a pillow on top of the pillow she has.
Dammit. She's asleep.
Oh well.
I walk into the room and head over to her side. She's so pretty. I slowly peel off the blanket from her body and I pull her shoulder towards me so that her body falls flat on the bed, putting her on her back.
Having no remorse whatsoever, I slide my arms underneath her knees and her back and lift her body off the bed, pulling her into my chest, her head subconsciously laying on my shoulder.
When her head makes contact with my bare skin- because who the hell sleeps with a shirt on?- she jolts and her half asleep eyes start looking around for the first sign of danger.
I rock my body back and forth, "Go back to sleep, baby. It's just me." I coo.
Her sleepy eyes look up and me and a tired pout forms on her lips. Her eyebrows scrunch together in confusion and my heart melts at how adorable she looks. "Elias..." She groans and smacks her lips together, my guess is to cure the dryness in her throat.
I smile at her sleepy state and order, "It's just me, Alex. Go back to sleep." I keep the rocking movement of my body going.
She moans tiredly and puts her head back on my shoulder, digging her face into my neck as she nuzzles into me for comfort.
If only she would do this when she's fully awake.
I jostle her a bit to get my arm underneath her back properly and that pulls another low groan out of her, her head bobbing as she tries to get comfortable. Her soft breaths of air puff against my neck and I shiver when her soft lips touch my skin.
She has no clue what she does to me.
Even being able to hold her like this feels like a dream come true.
I walk through the door and pull it close with my feet. My grip on her tightens as I walk us up the stairs and I playfully lift her up and down like I would a set of weights.
She fits perfectly in my arms.
I kick open my door and I guess the noise does it for her. Her head wiggles around and she moans sleepily. "Mmm... where are...?" Her words are slurred and sleepiness oozes from her tone. She's basically sleep talking right now.
"Shh, go back to sleep, baby." I pull her close and kiss her forehead gently, trying to put her back to sleep for the second time.
Normally her spot on my bed is the left side- which is the closest to my door- but with the way I'm holding her she'll have to go on the right.
Not that she's gonna care.
I lay her down gently and she naturally turns on her right side. Perfect.
Like a giddy teenager, I crawl up behind her and slide my arm underneath her head. I pull the blanket over and make sure she's fully covered, bringing it up to our necks before I tangle my legs with hers and drape my arm across her stomach, pulling her into my chest with both of my hands.
I curl the arm that's under her head and put her in a very loose chokehold, gripping her shoulder so my arm doesn't fall. I dig my face into her neck and inhale deeply.
She smells like flowers.
She moans and shuffles a bit, but all she really does is move her body closer to mine, digging her head into my arm which now acts as a sort of pillow for her.
Her left arm wraps around my forearm that's going across her belly and she uses her right hand to hang into the forearm that's wrapped around her neck- sort of like she's making sure it stays in place.
This. Is. It.
This is what I've been dreaming about for so long. Getting to hold her in my arms while we fall asleep peacefully... there's nowhere I'd rather be.
I leave light kisses across her bare shoulder- which her baggy shirt she fell asleep with exposes- and settle my face into her neck. I whisper a soft, "Goodnight, baby," into her skin and my eyelids start to close on their own accord.
My body practically engulfs hers and my brain starts to take in our positioning. Our bodies covered with a warm blanket, our legs intertwined, our skin touching, our arms in contact with each other, just knowing that my girl is close to me is enough to pull me into a deep sleep.
(Flashback over)
Okay so maybe I carried her into my bed, but I got the best sleep of my life that night.
She woke up the next morning not knowing how the hell we got in that situation, but she wasn't complaining. If anything, after I explained the whole thing to her she fell asleep for the second time right in my arms.
That was yesterday and at first she was freaking out about how she couldn't miss another day of school, but when she realized my hold on her wasn't going away, she gave in and said she could miss another day.
As if she had an option.
The thought of her going back to school makes me a bit sick. What if her body hurts and she doesn't tell me? What if she faints or has some sort of accident? I don't even want to think about it right now.
And don't get me started on when she has to pick up Mateo again.
I meant what I said at the hospital. I'm gonna start being more caring, more affectionate, more touchy, and for the past two days I've stuck to that. And the response I'm getting is great. She likes it- obviously. And it just makes me like her even more.
There's only one problem I have with this whole thing.
It's September 29th.
Exactly one week away from her birthday.
And I know exactly what I'm going to do on that day.
I guess it's not really a problem, it's more so me being impatient as fuck. I've been getting antsy, sloppy, I want to tell her what I have planned so fucking badly. But Angelica threatened to rip my head off if I did that.
I'm just excited. Really fucking excited. I have the whole day planned. She told me how she never celebrates her birthdays but she always does something for Mateo. I want to show her that her birthday deserves to be celebrated, that it's special.
Maybe I'm just a sap.
You learn a lot once you start 'living' with someone. For example, I've noticed something weird about Alex.
She doesn't like to eat.
I don't know if they fed her or something over those five days, but ever since we got home she hasn't been eating right.
She gives all of her food to Mateo. Anything my mom makes for her she just assumes that it's not meant for her. She takes the plate with a smile and instantly gives it to Mateo.
My parents have seen this too and it's only a bit concerning. I asked her the first time I saw her do that why she did it, and her response was... weird.
She looked at me like she was confused and said, "Why would this be for me?"
I don't think I've ever been so confused and heartbroken at the same time.
I tried telling her that that was her plate and that Mateo would get his own but she just shook her head and said, "No, he needs to eat."
She keeps doing it and each time it makes my heart race with anxiousness. She just won't accept any food.
Normally my mom considers it disrespectful when someone gives away her cooking, but seeing Alex do it and hearing why- even Ma told me that her heart hurts for her.
So I'm trying to break that out of her. I took her to eat before we came to the garage and while she was hesitant to order something, I made her get a fat juicy burger with fries.
Oh, speaking of the garage.
Right now, sweet cheeks and I are at my place of employment, better known as- the garage. Pa told me I had to work today and since I do need money for what I have planned for her birthday, I agreed instantly.
What made this even better is that she offered to come with me.
I know! She never really asks to hang out or anything like that, it's always me initiating everything. But she actually asked if she can come with me and I've never been happier.
I could see how nervous and hesitant she was to ask, but when she saw how happy it made me she relaxed instantly. I don't think she realizes that I always want her around.
So now *dramatic huff* I'm underneath some old ass Nissan Maxima with my back on some makeshift board that I put wheels at the bottom of to make myself slide out from underneath the cars I work on. And sweet cheeks over here is working as my handyman. I call out a tool, and she tries to hand me the correct one.
It's fucking adorable.
I grunt and stick my hand out form the side of the car. "Hand me a wrench would you, baby?" Something tells me this guy hasn't done an oil change in years.
"Uhm..." The clanking of tools scratches my ears and I can almost picture her tongue poking out the side of her lips in concentration.
She makes a noise of victory and puts a medium sized wrench in my hands. I chuckle out a breath of amusement. "Good job, sweet cheeks. You got that one."
A small, giddy 'yay' leaves her lips and out the corner of my eye I can see her body rocking from its criss-crossed position on the floor in happiness.
I move the bucket that I had next to me underneath this guys oil tank and unscrew the cap. Holy shit. How this guy hasn't crashed and died by now is beyond me. There's literally no fucking oil in here.
I scoff and shake my head in disbelief. "Baby, when's the last time you got your oil changed?"
A few seconds of silence pass and a long pause consumes us. Don't tell me...
I slide out completely from under the car and wipe my forehead with my forearm. My butt stays on the wooden board and I bend my left knee upwards and rest my left elbow on it, my other leg bends flat on the ground and I slap my right hand on top of my knee. "Sweet cheeks, please tell me you've gotten your oil changed in the last four months." I beg and hang my head.
I already know her answer.
She winces. "Shiiit... so that's what that blinking light is for?"
My head snaps up and I look at her with widened eyes. My face slowly morphs into a scowl when she starts laughing.
I knew I never saw the light blinking on her car.
She throws her head back with a loud cackle. "I'm fucking with you. I got it changed three months ago."
My eyes narrow into slits and I point the wrench at her warningly. "You're evil."
Her body shakes as she stifles a laugh. And I lower my body back onto the board, sliding underneath the car once again.
"What would happen if oil fell into your eye? Would you go blind?" Her voice perks up with curiosity.
I grunt, "Shit, I hope not. Then how would I be able to see your face everyday?" I grin sloppily even though she can't see me.
She scoffs. "I don't know what'll happen, it's never happened before." I told her.
"I don't believe that; you get oily and greasy everywhere except your eyes?"
I groan as the wrench becomes harder to twist. "I don't get your obsession with me being all greased up." The few times I've caught her gawking at me when I wipe my rag across my face or I run my forearm along my forehead is insane.
"You don't like it?" She asks.
I hum. "I mean, I like seeing all the hard work I've done reflect on my clothing at the end of the day, but sometimes I hate how this job affects my hands. My skin rips, my hands feel hard and rough, you never notice when we're holding hands how they feel like sandpaper?"
I hear her legs shift. "I like your hands. I like how rough they are, it feels nice."
I smirk, "They feel nice do they?"
"Get that look off your face. And yes they feel nice. I like how rough they feel." She grumbles.
Sometimes she has these random bursts of confidence where she has no filter on what she says and I love it completely.
I hear her stand suddenly and her shoes scrape against the concrete floor, she's probably checking her phone. When we came here, Mateo was still fast asleep so Angelica said she would watch him.
I understand why Alex gets so worried about Angelica watching him sometimes. She hasn't known us for long and she doesn't like feeling like she's putting the responsibility of taking care of him onto someone else, but she needs to get it through her head that we really don't care. Mateo is so low maintenance, it's almost baffling.
Which is part of the reason why Angelica offers to watch him so much. You don't really have to do much with him, just feed him, watch TV with him and he's good for the whole day.
Plus it helps how cute the little dude is. I think it's the curls, but maybe that's just me.
Now listen, I'm not trying to be a hater... but some kids are ugly.
I'M SORRY!
It's like that thing when new parents say how beautiful their baby was at birth but it looks like a bloody alien. Maybe it's because I don't have kids, but some kids or babies are just... ugh.
Maybe it's only like that when they eat. Kids are ugly eaters.
Finally finishing up emptying this guys oil, I slide out from under the car and my eyes find Alex's body instantly.
She's checking her phone, just like I said.
I grin and stand up, wiping my oily hands down my coveralls and wiping my forehead, groaning when I realize I've got grease all over my face.
Well that's not attractive.
Normally I don't care too much about how I look at the end of the day, but with Alex here I don't want her to think I'm dirty or filthy.
(A/n: trust me buddy, she loves it)
A grin stays plastered into my face as I come up behind her. Her body tenses when she feels my hands on her waist but then she relaxes when she realizes it's me.
It's just me, baby. You can trust me.
Trust is something I've realized is hard for Alex. As it is with many people, but the only person I care about is her.
I need to help her understand that she can trust me, with her body, her strong mind, and her beautiful soul.
So I'm starting with body first.
One thing at a time people.
My arms wrap around her entirely and I pull her into my chest, craning my neck about seven inches to rest my chin on her shoulder. "What're we doing?" I mumble against her ear.
She hisses when she feels my breath fan her skin and she looks up at the ceiling, her stomach tightening under my arms. "I was just seeing if Angelica texted me."
I frown. "Since when did you guys exchange numbers?"
"Since we started staying here for a bit." She murmurs. I wish that bit could turn into permanently, but sadly we're still young.
"Mmm," I stuff my nose into the crook of her neck and hum against her skin. Her sweet skin. The fact that she lets me get this close to her is fucking amazing. It means she's giving me some of her trust. You wouldn't let someone touch you like this is you didn't trust them.
My neck hurts.
(A/n: tall mf—)
Keeping her close to me, I unwrap my arms from her body and place them lightly at her hips. My hands creep up underneath my black button up shirt she asked to borrow- which I gave to her immediately- and they managed to get underneath the tight red and black striped shirt that clings to her body.
"Elias," she warns. Just as she does every time I get too touchy, but she doesn't move my hands away from her so I take that as a sign to keep going.
My hands now have the ability to freely roam the skin of her belly and I squeeze her firmly. "How're we feeling today? Anything hurt you?" I kiss her neck and she completely melts in my arms.
Even if she doesn't say it, I can tell by her body language that she enjoys my hands on her.
The way she tilts her head to give me more access to her neck, how her hands come up to holds mine that are on her body, and just the way she leans into my touch completely just shows how much she's okay with this.
And I love it. I love how she lets me do this. I love how she trusts that I won't go past what she's okay with.
She shakes her head, "I'm okay. A little sore but nothing hurts too bad." She admits.
I kiss the spot under her ear in acknowledgement and move my body closer to her- if that's even possible. A pleasured groan leaves her and her body tightens up. She squeezed her thighs which doesn't go unnoticed by me and it just makes me smirk against her beautiful skin.
Delicious.
"What are you doing?" Her voice turns raspy. If it wasn't for her breathless tone or the small noises of pleasure she makes, I would think she wants me off of her.
"Do you want me to stop?" I grunt against her neck. The funny part is, I'm not really doing much. Just some light kisses and my hands roaming her belly, but as long as she enjoys it I have no problem continuing.
She bites her lip in anxiety and I tut. That's not an answer. My left hand leaves her belly which surprisingly pulls out a noise of frustration from her, my hand comes up and cups her jaw, turning her head and tilting it upward so she's looking at me.
"I'll stop touching you if you want, but I need an answer, baby." I lean my forehead on hers. Communication and consent is a big thing for me when it comes to Alex, when it came to any girl before I met her, really.
It's not that I would hook up with every girl in sight- I've only had sex once, but I've made out with a few girls at some parties here and there and even if both of us were drunk I would always ask if she was okay with what I was doing.
I don't understand guys who don't ask for consent. It's literally a two second conversation. It's not even a conversation if you understand body language either.
Her eyes flickered between mine with nervousness and she bites down on her lip harder. She looked at me with pleading eyes, like she didn't know what to do or say. It's like she's conflicted, like she's battling something in her head and that's not okay with me.
I make the decision to use my thumb and pull her bottom lip out of her mouth- afraid she would end up making it bleed. I smiled at her softly and pressed a kiss to her nose and forehead. "Let's stop, okay?"
I don't want her to be confused when it comes to me touching her. If she wants me to keep going, I'll gladly do so. And if she doesn't, then I'll stop. But if she's confused then I don't want to pressure her into thinking that she has to keep going for my sake.
She deflates a bit when my right hand leaves her belly. I'm sure she was too nervous to admit she wanted me to keep going, but unless I hear the words from her lips I'm gonna stop.
Noticing the small frown forming on her lips, I chuckle. "Come here, baby." And I turn her around, pulling her into my arms for a hug.
She welcomes my embrace happily and clings to me like a koala to a tree. A proud smile forms on my lips. She's getting more comfortable with me.
I really wish she would do this more often. I love seeing Alex being all clingy and needy, it's fucking adorable. Also because I'm a clingy bastard myself so it's a match made in heaven.
Her tiny arms are wrapped around my torso and my left arms hugs her close to me by wrapping around her shoulders, my other arm going across her back where I rub up and down. She doesn't usually get clingy after we have small moments like this, but I love that she is now.
Her face buries itself in my face and I smile when I feel her inhale deeply.
She likes smelling me.
"Are you okay, sweet cheeks?" I lean down and kiss her hair, lingering for longer than I should.
I feel her nod against my chest and the tiniest bit of worry consumes me when she doesn't talk. She's usually very vocal after we have moments like these so this nonverbal shit has me scared.
I bring the hand that was rubbing her back up to her neck and I massage the delicate skin tenderly. "You're very beautiful, you know that?" I grin, trying to get a reaction out of her using my words.
(A/n: beautiful > pretty. Also we love physical and verbal reassurance after being slightly physical with one another <3)
Her takes her head off my chest and looks at me with a smile. "You're such a sap."
She spoke, ladies and gentlemen.
I smirk and purposefully deepen my voice, "You ain't seen nothin' yet, baby."
She laughs loudly at my horrible voice change and leans into me once again with her chin resting on my chest as she looks up at me. I take the hand that was on her neck and bring it forward slightly, my thumb now settling underneath her jaw.
Her brown, doe eyes look up at me with a certain emotion that I can't decipher, it's like a mix of happiness and... something else.
My head comes down to hers and our foreheads touch, both of our eyes fluttering shut at the contact.
She smells so good, she feels so good. Something about touching the skin of the person you love... it's just addicting. I need her, I crave her, she's like my own personal drug and I'm a hopeless addict.
(A/n: a part of me feels like I stole that line from someone else... idk I feel like I've read it somewhere so if someone else did use it plz lmk)
Goosebumps rise on the back of her neck when my fingers weave through the hair at the back of her neck and I shiver. Every feeling in my body is heightened whenever I touch her. Like my body knows it's her, my heart aches when she's not near and I know it's because she's the other half of me that I've been missing my whole life.
Call it quick, puppy-love, teen romance, the honeymoon stage, I don't give a fuck. I know what I feel, and I'm not ashamed to say it.
I just need to say it at the right time.
Her breathing turns choppy when my nose nudges hers and my lips part repeatedly, trying so hard to fight back what I've wanted to do for weeks now.
When the tip of my top lip grazes hers I swear my eyes rolled into the back of my head and a jolt went through my body. It's true what they say, kissing someone, especially the right person... it feels electrifying. I haven't even fucking kissed her yet and she's already pulled this type of reaction from me.
I definitely never felt this with my ex.
My eyes open to gauge her reaction and my heart skips with excitement to see her eyes shut and her cheeks slightly flushed. Her lips parted as she breathes raggedly.
Fuck, and I just said I wouldn't touch her.
My thumb manipulates her jaw, craning her neck higher up and a small gasp leaves her. By now both of our lips are parted and our shallow breaths mingle, both of us trying desperately to find each other's lips, but I can't. Now isn't the right time.
She deserves something special.
So instead, I take a bold route and press my lips to the corner of her mouth, so close, but not quite kissing her fully.
That's the most... intimate we've gotten.
Her eyes flutter open and she swallows thickly. "Why do you do this?" She says breathlessly. Her voice is thick with passion and the smallest bit of lust that makes me go fucking insane. Her uneven breaths fan against my skin and I bask in the feeling, my heart slowing down with content knowing how close she is.
"Do what, baby?" My voice thickens with lust and desire but I clench my jaw to control myself. Her jaw still under the control of my thumb and it makes this situation so much worse.
Hold back, dammit. Don't do it. Don't fucking do it.
"Touch me," God, with the way she looks it me it sounds more like a plea than a statement. "Kiss me. Why do you do it?" Her dark eyes look between mine as she desperately looks for an answer. Her eyes holding a gleam of hope.
She still doesn't get it. She still doesn't understand how crazy I am about her. What she does to me, she doesn't understand the power she holds over me.
Just wait, now is not the time. My inner subconscious tells me.
With a clenched jaw, I wrap my hand fully around her jaw and hold her tight. Her teeth sink into that delicious looking bottom lip of hers and a pleasured look crosses her face at my rough hold on her jaw.
"I kiss you, because you're mine. I touch you, because you're mine. Mine to kiss, mine to touch, and mine to care for." My voice turns serious as I look straight into her eyes.
She looks a bit frustrated with my answer. "What does that mean?"
"You'll know soon." I hold the back of her head and kiss her forehead. "Don't think about it for now," I pull her head back into my chest, our chests rise and fall at the same pace as our breathing syncs together.
I start to sway our bodies side to side lightly, enough to feel it, but not enough so that other people notice. My right hand smoothes down her hair and I notice her breathing turn even.
She's calm now.
My lips awkwardly peck her forehead, staying there longer than they should've before I rest my chin at the top of her head. I sigh at the peaceful feeling running through my body.
I love this. Just holding her feels like a dream.
As much as I love having her close, I still have a few more cars to work on before my dad gets on my ass.
I kiss her hair, "I gotta get back to work, baby. Wanna be my little helper?" I add, not wanting her to feel bored.
She looks up at me with a grin and wiggles excitedly. "Can I change a tire?" Our serious mood from a few minutes ago completely washes away.
Can I marry you? "Sure, sweet cheeks."
That's basically how we spent today. Doing absolutely nothing but for some reason it meant absolutely everything. Being able to sit around and not do much with her but still have it mean something is so fucking special and I never want to lose it.
I never want to lose her.
_______________________________
This kid is passed out.
Like full on- mouth open, body spread out, drool coming out of his mouth- everything.
He's just laying dead on the couch.
I look at Angelica with my hands on my hips and a singular eyebrow raised at her. She looks between me and Alex sheepishly. "Okay so I maybe gave him a melatonin gummy. But in my defense I thought it was a vitamin gummy! It was shaped like Fred Flintstone," she defends herself.
Alex looks between both of them with her lips pursed to hold in her laugh. She eventually breaks and laughs loudly, "How many milligrams was it?"
"It said only one, but I thought it meant one milligram of... I don't know protein or something! He's been sleepy for hours so I thought giving him a vitamin gummy would wake him up. But instead he went right back to sleep." She huffs.
She's lucky Alex finds this amusing. "Well, lets hope he stays asleep throughout the night." She points out the fact that it's already 1"pm.
Yeah, work ran late. I was able to get off at eight, but by that time I figured sweet cheeks would be hungry so I forced her into this sweet fast food place. The best fast food on earth.
White Castle.
My usual order of a plain vanilla shake and five sliders with cheese fries filled me up quickly. The whole time Alex looked at me like she couldn't believe I could eat so much.
I made sure she was stuffed until she couldn't move before we left the parking lot. We spent a good hour and a half just eating and taking.
It was one of those moments of complete mundanity that turn into a lasting memory because you're spending it with someone you care about. Hopefully she feels the same way.
Which brings us to now. We got home and saw Mateo passed out on the couch with a guilty looking Angelica sitting next to him.
"I would also like to point out that when I actually looked at the bottle it said kids melatonin. I thought it was kids vitamins. Why the hell do we even have kids melatonin in this house?!" She cries with a guilty look on her face.
I shrug my shoulders innocently. "Sometimes I give them to you so you can shut up and go to sleep." I scratch under my jaw and look away from her.
The silence is deafening as she takes in my words. "All this time you were drugging me instead of giving me fruit snacks like a regular person?!"
Oh for fucks- "You're not dead are you? And besides, what grown ass teenager falls asleep to one milligram of melatonin?" I need at least 20 milligrams sometimes.
She sputters and points a creepy ass finger in my direction with her eyes popping out of their sockets. "Shameful. Shameful behavior."
"Oh, give me a break." I scoff.
Alex claps her hands and snorts. "As amusing as this is, I gotta put the kid to bed." She starts to walk towards him but I cut her off. "You're not carrying him."
Instead, I walk in front of Mateo and lift him up by his under arms, plopping his sleepy body onto my chest. She scoffs, "I could've done that."
I give her a disbelieving look. "I'm sure you could've."
I walk straight past her and head for the guest room that they're staying in. I kick open the door with my feet and walk over to the bed, gently placing his dead weight on the mattress.
I don't put the blanket over him, just because of the fact that he has pants on and I don't want him to overheat.
The hairs on the back of my neck stand tall when I hear Alex behind me. She walks around me to the other side of the bed and takes off her shoes, pulling back the covers as she prepares to hop into bed.
Oh hell no.
"Mmm mmm," I make a noise that tells her no and I walk around to where she is. She's still standing and she looks at me with furrowed brows and a confused frown on her lips; one of her hands clutching the blanket.
"Elias, what are you...?" She talks slowly as she sees me walking towards her. Not giving a single fuck, I lower my body and put one hand under her knees and the other one on her back, scooping her into my arms.
She shrieks and her arms wrap around my neck as she hangs on for dear life. "Elias! No no no no, put me down. Elias, I'm not kidding, put me down!" Her voice trembles with fear and I would think she was just being dramatic if I didn't see her bottom lip wobble.
My eyes soften, "Alex, how do you think you got into my bed the other day?"
She looks at me with terrified eyes as she pleads. "I don't wanna think about it, now please put me down." She croaks and hides her face into my neck.
She's sat on my lip, I've given her a reverse piggyback ride out of the bookstore, and she's scared now?
When I start walking out the room with her still in my arms she begs. "Please. I'm gonna hurt your arms or your back or something." She whimpers.
I frown at that and stop in place. "Alex, you're not gonna hurt me. It's fine."
She keeps muttering, oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, repeatedly under her breath as she digs her face into my neck, shielding herself from the world.
When I get to the stairs she nearly cries, "Elias."
I ignore her and walk up the stairs with ease. I don't understand why she's so scared...
The gears start to turn in my head. She doesn't eat... she doesn't want me to pick her up... she always tries to get off of my lap... does she think she's...? Does she think she's too big?
No, that can't be it. She can't possibly think that.
I reach the top of the stairs and jostle her a bit, "See? Everything's fine."
She slowly takes her head out of my neck and opens one eye. I kick open my door and shut it closed with my foot, bringing her over to the bed.
I settle her down on her side and she asks, "Why am I here?" Her voice is soft and filled with insecurity.
I unzip my coveralls to reveal a plain white shirt and some pants. I throw them in a nearby hamper before reaching my arms behind my head and pulling up my shirt to take it off.
I hear her shaky breath when my shirt comes off and I flex my back muscles just to tease her.
Now standing shirtless in a pair of jeans and a belt, I turn around and look at the pretty girl sitting on my bed right now.
Her knees are hugged into her chest and her arms wrap around her legs, her eyes already trained on my body before they look up to my eyes.
She looks so... soft and sweet, and I guess... pure would be the right word. But she also looks incredibly scared. Normally she has a cool, slightly intimidating exterior, but right it looks like she's wearing her heart on her sleeve. Like her walls are slowly crumbling down and she doesn't know what to do about it, like she doesn't know what to feel or think. And it's my job to help her realize that she doesn't need to protect herself around me. How she is right now, with her anxiousness showing and her feelings coming out is what I want her to understand she can be like around me.
I walk over to her slowly and maintain a neutral expression on my face. I settle myself on my fists that are on either side of her legs and I look straight into her eyes. "You're here because I can't sleep without you. You're here because I need you."
My hand comes up to cup her right cheek and I kiss her left, pecking her forehead when that's done. "I'm gonna shower, make yourself comfortable."
"How am I supposed to do that?" The vulnerable look in her eyes tell me that she wants me to tell her what to do, like she's tired of making decisions.
"Lay on your back, baby." She lays on her back and turns to the side. I lift the blanket over her and stuff it into her neck, essentially tucking her in.
I pull out my phone and look up marine life videos on YouTube. I find a 30 minute video about the types of animals that live in the ocean and I turn it on, handing her the phone.
She grabs it with her hand still underneath the blanket and looks at me confusedly, "What is this supposed to... oh! It's a seal." She grins happily.
Absolutely fucking adorable.
The whole time I pick out what clothes I'm gonna wear, she's completely immersed in the video. Her eyes move with the way the animals swim. She doesn't even look up at me when I tell her I'll be back in twenty minutes.
I love the way she's being right now. Like she's letting out her inner child by doing the littlest things. Letting me put in a video for her, being engrossed in said video, letting her guard down even if she doesn't realize it, that happy ass grin she gave me when I gave her my phone.
I'm proud of her for showing me that side of her, even if she doesn't know that's what she's doing.
God, I'm falling hard.
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She's still watching that damn video.
I walked back into the room freshly showered- wearing nothing but my boxers and some black basketball shorts over- and see her in the same position I left her in 20 minutes ago.
I chuckle, "Enjoying the video?"
"Did you know orcas are the predators to great white sharks? They're apex which means they don't have predators. Not one damn fish in the ocean has the balls to eat an orca. Not even a sperm or a blue whale." She scoffs and looks back at the phone. "Wow."
Note to self: Alex likes animal planet videos. Specifically those about marine life.
I hum and go to my drawer as she continues. "I mean orcas are kinda assholes. They eat sea lions, Elias. Sea lions. How the hell could you eat a seal lion, they're so cute." She huffs.
"I don't think the orcas care about that, baby," I pulled out one of my boxers and a graphic T-shirt.
Well they should," she grumbles. "What if that sea lion had a family? What if it had babies on the way? Oh my fucking god, what if it was pregnant?!" She gasps.
I turn around and throw the clothes on top of her body, "Put those on."
She blinks at the clothes and then blinks at me, "I can just get something of mine—"
"—No, now change so we can go to sleep. Please." I add at the end.
She eyes me weirdly before speaking in a low, soft voice, "Can you turn around?"
I turn around completely and fumble with things in my drawer to pass the time. Oh... why is there Halloween candy in here?
The ruffling of clothes and bedsheets tells me that she's getting changed and I smile. She's putting on my clothes. My clothes will be on her body.
I smirk.
A few seconds pass before she calls out, "Okay." Letting me know she's done changing.
I turn around and see her old clothes folded up very neatly and stacked together on the floor. Her whole body is back underneath the covers and I smile. She looks so cozy.
I jump into the bed behind her and she squeals with laughter when I almost crush her. I wiggle my body under the covers and immediately curl my body around hers. Our bare legs tangle with each other and just as I did the other night, I worm my left arm under her head and my right one comes over her belly, pulling her into my chest.
She moans contently and wiggles closer to me. I stuff my head into her neck and kiss the soft skin. "Goddamn, you're pretty, baby." I mumble into her skin.
I don't even have to look at her to know her eyes are rolling right now.
I lift the arm that's under her head and put her into a loose headlock, gripping her shoulder so my arm doesn't flop. The moment I do so, she moans and arches into me.
Holy shit.
Her hands come up to grab my forearm, but she doesn't push me away. Just like when she was asleep, she uses her hands to make sure my arms stay there. "Why did you do that?" She asks me, referring to the positioning of my arm.
"So you'll never leave me," I bite down on her shoulder jokingly. Instead of freaking out, she actually laughs with me. "I like it. It's... it's kinda comforting. Like it makes me feel safe if that makes sense," she admits; her voice trailing off.
I grin, "Then I'll do it more often."
She puts my phone on the nightstand in front of her and nuzzles her head into my arm, her hands subconsciously rub the skin of my bare forearm and I almost groan at the warm feeling of her skin against mine. My legs slide up and down hers and I pull her even closer.
She's so warm.
My lips place a hot kiss at the crook of her neck. And then another, and another, until eventually I can't stop. I plant wet kisses all the way from her neck to just underneath her ear, taking her earlobe between my teeth and nibbling lightly.
She tries to move her head to give me access, "Elias." That wasn't a warning or a plea, it was just the soft whisper of my name that electrified everything.
Her soft breaths fill my ear with each kiss, her pants that she desperately try to hold in escape her and it just tempts me further.
Not thinking before I do, my tongue darts out in between kisses to taste her sweet skin. This time I do groan against her and she shivers at the vibrations. "Baby... the way you taste..." I grunt. She tastes fucking amazing. So sweet, so mine. That's how she tastes.
Like mine.
I can't let this get too heated, both of us are only half naked and that's not a good combination. But also because she means more to me than this. I want every moment with us to be special because that's what she deserves.
She gasps when my tongue flicks against her skin and she bites down on her lower lip. To my surprise, she hugs the middle of my forearm closer to her neck, almost like she's putting pressure against her nec- I need to stop.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, I need to stop.
Soft suckles and slow, teasing wet kisses cover her skin and she wiggles into me, her squeezing of her thighs doesn't go unnoticed by me.
Okay, seriously stop. "Let's stop, baby. Yeah?" My voice sounds rough and ragged as I pant into the crook of her neck. My hand on her shoulder tightens as I try to tone it down a notch.
Our chests rise and fall as we try and catch our breath, the whole room suddenly feels very heated and we both just need to chill out.
I kiss her cheek and mumble, "Let's get some sleep, baby." My harsh breath hits her skin.
"Elias," she murmurs. Somethings off about the tone she used, like she sounds scared.
"Yes?" I hold her tighter.
She doesn't say anything for a few seconds and a small part of me starts to worry. What's she thinking?
Understanding grips me when her hands hold my forearm tighter, slightly shaking as they do so. Her voice is cracked and shaky as she says just below a whisper, "Elias."
She's scared. She's scared of our connection, of what could happen, she's feeling overwhelmed and I feel like a dick for doing that to her. The anxiety in her voice is clear and all she needs right now is some reassurance.
"I know, sweet cheeks. I know," I sigh. She's not the only one here that's scared. Because the truth is, I'm fucking petrified.
I'm scared of losing her once I tell her the truth, I'm scared of what I feel for her, I'm scared of how hard I've fallen in such little time.
Because the truth is I've fallen for her. I've fallen for Alex Solace and it scares the shit out of me.
It scares me how much I love her.
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8527 Words! (4/23/22)
My break from writing will start now. Chapter 21 will be up next Saturday!
Also we hit 70k reads! Holy shit I can't thank youguys enough.
We started April will 40k reads and the month isn't even over and we've already gained another 30k!
There's so much happiness in my heart rn it's unbelievable. You guys make all the stressful days and all the writers block worth it. Thank you so much for reading and I hope you guys never leave.
Did y'all like el chapter? 😏 it was sort of a filler... sort of not.
This chapter was mostly some fluffiness to process their relationship a bit.
Also I don't wanna spoil anything but.... We will have a very special double update coming soon!
Not all double updates will be bad.
Also I have something i want to say. There will be sex in this book. But I don't know if I would count it as smut. Calling it 'intimacy between the two characters' sounds more appropriate to me. Yes, it will be steamy, but it'll also be sweet and romantic. Reason for that being is because I feel like they deserve it. Because of Alex's past with sexual activity, I feel like intercourse between them should be more beautiful and intimate.
Some parts will be more smutty than sweet, some will be smutty and sweet, but for the most part it'll be beautiful and meaningful.
And about the characters being minors, Alex is about to turn 18, as is Elias which will make BOTH of them legal adults in a week for Alex and a month for Elias.
Now that that's cleared up.
I have a question, do y'all reread Solace when ur bored? We all have that book we reread hella times. Do y'all reread this one? Personally I reread Without You by AshlynPope a LOT! Also the Ice series by engelix ..... and the Knight Security series by MelyssaWhyte ...I reread a lot okay?!
Another quick question... did y'all actually think my name was Mika Flores? 💀 LMFAO no it's not. It's a quote unquote 'pen name'. Idk how the name came to me but it did.
This is Alex's outfit.
I couldn't find a picture of a hot teenage guy in coveralls so use ur imagination💀
I'll see you guys in a week!
Love ya <3