That's Not Me

By AdrienneDiorXVI

131K 3.7K 1.3K

Hailee Steinfeld X female Reader Hailee Steinfeld is an award winning actress and singer who is known to have... More

Off the Grid
Hi My Name is...
Promise Me
Slow Gernade
A Hitch in the Plan
A Minute of Your Time
When She Loved Me
Out of My League
Where it Starts
A Good Day For Plotting
Little Did I Know
Locked In: Pt 1
Locked In: Pt 2
Strike a Match
Running Out of Luck
A Moment of Happiness
Realization
Stupid, Even Me
What's Been Built Up
Can She Survive?
One Step Closer
A lullaby and A Melody
Tell Me Why Im Waiting?
A change of Pace
Double Heart-Break
Desiderium
There Can Only Be One
Sweet Little Lies
I Found the Truth About You, Baby
Confrontation
Just Us
Divert My Attention
Getting Nervous Now
I Can't, I Won't!
Over The Hill
The Way I felt
Wake Up Call
Tears On Your Lips
Will it Save Me From The Fall?
Trust Me... Just This Once
We Didn't Know
It's A Bitter Taste

Who Do You Love?

3.4K 85 26
By AdrienneDiorXVI




Narrator's P.O.V


Walking down the streets Hailee has become all too familiar with, she couldn't stop herself from thinking about everything that her friend had said. Her only objective at the time was helping y/n reach her dream. She didn't know when y/n became her only priority. Falling for her, and wanting to spend more time with her.

Hailee knew Noelle was right. She knew she had to put a stop to this before it was too late. Thats why she had to make an excuse to leave Emily behind. It was the only way after all. There was no in between, no other way around it. Emily needed to step back from the spot light. Hailee needed to show y/n that she was more than what y/n thought she was. That Hailee can be just as kind and caring.


"Hey y/n what are you working on?" Emily happily said, walking up towards the young girl who was playing the guitar. Y/n was quick to look at her friend at the sound of her favorite voice. Strumming the guitar softly, y/n took a deep breath.

"oh I- uh, im writing a new song. Do you want to... maybe hear it?" y/n said shyly shifting her gaze onto the ground. Y/n was starting to feel nervous, but happy altogether. Emily nodded her head setting her things down and sitting next to her friend. Getting into a comfortable position, y/n began to strum the guitar softly, trying to avoid eye contact. She knew once she looked into her eyes she will be lost in them, and probably do something she's been craving ever since the first time.


Hailee listened to ever word that y/n sung. She knew full well who this song was about, and all though it made her feel happy, it only made her feel more guilty.

Zendaya and Ariana were talking about how the song and who it might be about, thinking that it would be about Emily, while Selena just stayed quiet. She didn't want to show her emotions. She wasn't the type. But deep down, she felt this feel she could on describe as jealousy.

Hailee just swallowed thickly, trying to process everything. She had to stay strong and not give in. She had to make this right, no matter. Her new plan, make y/n fall in love with her, as hailee. But she knew she had to do it in a way that wouldn't break y/n heart.

"I have a few other songs I've been working on, but this one has been stuck in my head. All these thoughts and feelings. I just had to put them into a song" y/n finally broke the silence. It was easy for her to write songs based of her thoughts. Sometime the songs would be nice with sweet lyrics, while other times her songs came from a dark place. Thats why, y/n liked it when she thought about Emily. She liked the songs she was able to write just for her, inspired by her. Songs she knew held a special place in her heart.

"Wow y/n I didn't think you were good at writing sappy love songs. normally your songs are based off of random scenarios" Zendaya chipped in.

"Yeah, it was weird at first but... I don't know, my fingers were moving on their own, and next thing I know words were just flowing out of my mouth like I've sung this song a thousand times" Y/n let out a soft laugh.

She didn't write songs about love, mainly because she never experienced it. She had never been in a relationship. She was always scared of letting people into her life, scared that if they find out how bad her life really was, they wouldn't want to stay. She would rather by alone, then have someone enter her life just to leave because they couldn't bare the thought of being with someone so fucked up.

There were many people who attempted to try to talk or make a move on the young girl, but she would always reject them. Ariana and Zendaya had always told y/n to give someone a chance, cause she would never know. But how could she give someone a chance when she didn't feel comfortable around them. She hated people and felt as thought her anti-social tendencies played a big part in that. When in reality she was just waiting for someone like... Emily.

"Well this song was great, I'd like to hear more" Emily smiled.

"O-of course..." y/n softly spoke trying to hide the shyness in her voice.


• • • • • • • • • • • • • • •


Later that day, Emily and y/n were walking home after stopping by a local pizza place to grab a bite to eat. It was night and the March weather was still a bit cold, but there was something about tonight that made it a little warmer. The LA smog wasn't as visible and y/n was happy that she was able to see the stars and the moon. Her comforting light.

"I think I ate too much" Emily groaned, rubbing her tummy.

"You only ate 3 slices" y/n laughed

"Hey those piece were huge. Each one was the size of my head" Emily playfully rolled her eyes. She gently pushed the young girl to the side causing both to let out a laugh.

"Okay, then lets do some after-dinner-workouts. You know to help the food go down" y/n said stopping in her tracks. Curiously, Hailee also stopped to look at the girl who seemed focused. Next thing she knew, y/n jumps into the air and does a backflip landing perfectly on her feet. However, y/n stumbled a bit back, letting out a painful hiss. Hailee was a bit confused, she saw y/n land perfectly. Did she somehow twist her ankle or did she land wrong? Y/n just took a breath through clench teeth, trying to let the pain pass.

"y/n are you okay?" Emily asked worryingly. She took a hold of y/n, helping her walk towards a near by bench.

"y-yeah im fine, I uh... I, landed wrong." Y/n said trying to hide the pain.

"Here let me take a look" Emily squatted down, moving in front of y/n. Before Hailee could even reach for y/n foot, y/n stopped her. Grabbing onto Emilys wrist a bit tight.

"Im okay." was all y/n said before shaking her head and standing up. Hailee raised a brow. Y/n's tone was low and cold. It sent chills down her spine. Y/n took a hold of Emilys hand, helping her up to her feet. Hailee was still a bit confused, but decided not to think about it. Maybe it was one of those quick pains. Y/n did seem to be feeling better.

Emily looked down, noticing that both their hands where still interlaced into one another. She kept a strong smile, not daring to break free from the hold. She knew she shouldn't keep leading y/n on, but... all hailee wanted to do in that moment was continue hold y/n any way she could. So this... hand holding, it wasn't so bad. It was just a small gesture, nothing more. Still.

"Y/n"

"Emily"

Both girls turned to each other at the same time, laughing nervously. They didnt think it would be awkward, but there was something there. They were nervous around each other, both not knowing what to say or do. So much happened, neither of them knew where they stood. What their relationship was. Hailee already had her plan, but y/n... y/n wanted to take a leap forward.

"you go" Emily said.

"I- uh, I want to tell you-"

Hailee clenched her jaw. She felt her blood run cold and anxiety began to built up. She tried to keep a poker face, but all her emotions were reaching their max. Hailee could also tell y/n was nervous. She was fidgety, playing with the bottom of her backpack straps. Her eyes looking all around almost trying to avoid eye contact. But there was no panic, just... a nervous calm from the young girl.

"here let me go first" Emily suggested. She figured, maybe this was a way to slowly and gently let the girl down easy. This was her out, and as much as she didn't want to do it, she had to. She had to do this for y/n, and for herself. If she didn't do it now, hailee feared that she would never be able to. "What I wanted to tell you is that..." Hailee didn't know why it was so hard. She didn't want to break down. It wasn't like she was never going to see her again. But the thought of hurting y/n, Hailee couldn't bare that thought.

"I guess we both have a lot on our mind" Y/n cut the silence. Both girls couldn't go through with their thoughts. There was something that was preventing them from speaking, or thinking clearly. But Hailee had to fight it, she had to say what she needed to say. She needed to fight off whatever was holding her back. She won't hurt y/n, she won't make her disappoint, it was just a simple out, nothing more. Emily was leaving, and Hailee was still going to be there.

Hailee... Yes, it was now Hailees turn to try and win over the young girls heart. Thats the one thing hailee needed to focus on. Her turn.

How should I tell you that... Im Hailee Steinfeld, Hailee thought sighing a bit.

"Lets... lets go home" Emily said dropping her head. She couldn't do it. She was so close, she had her chance, but she couldn't. She was too much of a coward.


• • • • • • • • • • • • • • •


Early the next day, y/n was finishing up packing her bags after finishing her last class. She sat on her seat staring down onto her laptop, which was the only thing left to put away. Student after students walked up the lecture hall stairs, talking to their friends walking past the young girl to leave the classroom. Y/n didn't bother to move. Once again her laptop showed the brightly lit screen, opened to a google doc, but there was nothing. No notes, no punctuations, not even a single letter. The curser just blinking, waiting for something to be typed.

Y/n snapped out of her trance when her laptop got a message. She rolled her eyes seeing that it was from none other than the devil incarnation, asking to meet up.

Y/n just closed her laptop shoving it into her backpack. Stomping her way outside, she took out her phone and began to call the girl herself. She was so sick and tired of Hailee asking her to meet up whenever she wanted. Y/n had a life, and couldn't just drop everything and meeting the older girl whenever she pleased. Still, it was weird that Hailee messaged her when her last class of the day ended.


Hailee climbed out of her Lamborghini, dripping in Louis Vuitton. She took off her sunglass, looking all around. She knew she was near the school, and was waiting for the young girl to arrive. She started to become a bit anxious when 10 minutes past by and there was no sign of the girl. She took out her cellphone but there was no message or anything from y/n. Before she could put the phone back into her pocket, it finally rang.

Without checking the contact hailee brought the phone up to her ear, answering it. She felt the corner of her lip being tugged upwards, and she couldn't do anything to stop it.

"hello" Hailee happily answered. "Wait hang on let me guess. You're calling to tell me that you're going to be late, am I right?" Hailee let out a small laugh.

"Princess, Im a busy woman. I go to college, and I don't have to respond to all your wild requests. Later" Y/n calmly shouted before hanging up. Hailee tried to stop her, but the phone went dead before words were able to leave her mouth. Hailee only mentally cursed. This was going to be much harder then she thought.


• • • • • • • • • • • • • • •


Griffin sat back on his seat, opening and closing the cap of his pen. Turning towards the door, he saw Sofia, his secretary and Jayce, his personal assistant walk in. The two looked a bit worried but made an attempt to play it off. They both knew that their boss had been in a mood ever since multiple record labels wanted y/n y/Ln. They didn't know what he had against the girl, but they knew he wasn't a fan.

"Ive decided to officially invite Selena Gomez to join Majesty Records" Griffin said looking at the two. He saw Jacye's body tense, and Sofia gave a small smile.

"I thought Selena turned down the offer many times before." Sofia said, wondering what griffin was thinking.

"Sir, you even went personally to their studio just for her, but she still rejected the offer" Jacye also voiced his concern. "I don't think the situation will change now"

"Dont you understand?" Griffin scoffed. He twisted in his chair taking a couple of glances to his computer, and the papers stacked on his desk. Letting out a chuckle he focused his attention on the two in front of him. "Majesty Records has lost 20 to 30 percent of our clients. They all turned to (Y/N Y/LN). They want her music on all their stuff. Movies, Tv shows, commercials. It can't go on like this."

"Shouldn't we notify Ms. Steinfeld first. After all your father, the president of the record company did make your sister active CEO for the time being." Sofia suggested, not wanting to get her boss in any trouble.

Everyone knew the record company's president was Hailee's and Griffins father Peter. Not only that, but Hailee was the active CEO while griffin who was Hailee's older brother was her manager and COO of the company. The two siblings were almost always on the same page when it came to decision making, and normally it was griffin who took care of the business side of things. Still, Griffin hated when someone would question his authority. Hailee didn't care about being CEO, especially since her only focus was music, which griffin thought was a perfect fit for her. Thats why he was side tracked when hailee was finally making decisions. He didn't like it one bit.

"You think it's necessary?" Griffin stood up. "Hailee is presumptuous and puts us aside, do you really think she cares? All she worries about is her music and movie career."

"Sofia, I think Griffin has a point. Selena is the only trump card Y/n has now. She is the best producer in her corner, and we need to get her to work for us, and the clients will come back to us." Jacye said siding with his boss.

"Exactly." Griffin said.

"I'll handle this right away." Jacye nodded his head before walking out of the office, Sofia following behind.

Griffin took a breath trying to calm himself down. He knew he had to get Selena away from y/n by any means necessary. She was the only reason why y/n was becoming popular. Her music was only good thanks to Selena being a genius producer. Making the songs better then what they really were. Griffin always wanted Selena to work with his company, but now, he was more determined than ever.




Mean while on the other side of the city, hailee was in her apartment. She was still dressed in her expensive clothes, cleaning Emilys glasses.

"Thinking about y/n?" Noelle said, placing herself next to the celebrity.

"Is it that obvious" Hailee said, dropping her head just a bit.

"The one she loves now is...--"

"Emily Martinez" Hailee said annoyed. Nolle couldn't help but laugh at the misfortune her friend was having. "the bright smile, heart-warming, and caring gal" hailee scoffed rolling her eyes. "We created together... Emily Fucking Martinez"

"Woah, what's with this we business. You speak French now"

"Noelle"

"Haiz the only reason I agreed to this was for you to spend time with your childhood friend and help her reach her dream in the music industry. Thats it. It was a get in, get out type of plan, but it was you who did more. The plan was never to make y/n fall in love with you." Noelle said trying to defend herself. She loved her friend, and cared for her happiness, but she knew deep down... hailee was a dumbass.

Noelle never intended for things to go the way they did, and if she would of known sooner she would of put a stop to it, but now. Not only will Hailee get hurt, but an innocent girl as well. That small tidbit tugged on the older girls heartstrings. She didn't know y/n the way hailee did, or at all for the most part. But she knew just how important she is in Hailess's life which made her important to Noelles life. In some strange way, she also felt the need to protect and watch over the young girl.

"Y/n Y/Ln... How dare you stand me up?" Hailee shook her head. Noelle only raised a brow, confused with her friends sudden change in tone. "That's new. Noelle did you know she turned me down solemnly this afternoon when I asked her out."

"No... Hailee Steinfeld had never been rejected before." Noelle faked offensive for her friend. "Wait is that why you're upset?"

"Upset... me. Ha- don't kid yourself. Who do you think I am? Why should I feel...-" Hailee saw the shit eating grin her friend was giving and decided to just shut up herself. She knew Noelle was right. Even if she wouldn't admit it. "Im just a bit lost about what to do" Hailee said sincerely.

"If you want my advice I think--" Noelle was cut off by the sound of Hailee's phone ringing. Both looked at the caller, and sighed when they saw Griffins name.

"Griffin, what do you want?" Hailee whined.

"Hailee, can you come to the office tomorrow?" Griffin said, his voice firm.

"Why should I?"

"I'd like to have you and me, as CEO and COO of Majesty Records, to officially invite Selena Gomez to join us"

There was a new problem that made Hailee's blood run cold. Her mind went completely blank, not knowing what to think. She knew her brother always wanted Selena to join, but griffin never pushed. Why now?

"Griffin. I really don't think this is quite possible." Hailee said. That was the only thing that was able to come out of her mouth in that moment.

"This time is different. I'll offer the best terms and reasons. Im sure she'll realize that staying with a no name such as (Y/n Y/Ln), will only limit her performance."

"Dont say that about y/n. You and I both know how talented she really is. She might be a no name now, but once she signs that contract with Rocque Records her name will be bigger than anything--"

"Yes I am aware. We went over this remember. But right now we aren't talking about her we are talking about Selena, so please, be here tomorrow... bye" and with that griffin ended the call.

Upon hearing the dead end, hailee ran her fingers through her hair before tossing her phone somewhere. Now she was pissed.


• • • • • • • • • • • • • • •


"Okay, Ill see you later?" Selena hung up the phone. "The assistant of Majesty records COO called" Selena chuckled causing everyone to look her way. Y/n who was playing the guitar, trying to write a new song glanced up just a bit. "They want me there tomorrow" Selena said.

"Didn't you turn them down" Ariana commented pausing her video game.

"They want to officially discuss about the terms and benefits." Selena sighed. She notice y/n begin to bounce her leg, as she gripped the neck of her guitar tightly.

Selena stood up from the kitchen table and walked towards the living room couch and sat next to her friend. Placing a hand on her bouncing leg, y/n quickly looked at Selena. "Relax y/nn. I want you to come with me tomorrow"

"M-me, why me" Y/n stuttered a bit confused.

"I want Majesty Records to give up on this idea forever... when my only music employer is present."

"Selena"

"I like turning your music a reality. You write amazing songs, and every time I'm able to help you turn it into something more, it makes me, happy and feel like I'm helping you write a story with your music. If I produce music with just anyone, then I would feel like im just making sounds that sound good"

"Simp" Zendaya sneezed out causing Selena to shoot her a dagger like glare.

"So, is it okay that we go together tomorrow?" Selena ask taking y/n's hand into her.

with a bright smile y/n nodded, "Okay ill go with you" she said happily.

"See that... those are goals right there." Zendaya pointed at the two, see both girls roll their eyes, Ariana a bit confused at what was happening.


• • • • • • • • • • • • • • •


The early morning sunshine filled the boardroom with its bright rays. The secretary placed a cup of coffee in front of everyone that was sitting down. Y/n was nervous, but at the same time calm. Selena was right by her side, while Hailee sat in front of her. Even though she hated that fact that she had to be in the same room as her, she actually was thankful. Griffin scared her. She liked the friendly face, even if she was an enemy in this situation.

It didn't help that hailee was staring right at her, like if she was looking right through her. Y/n didn't know if she was mad about what happened yesterday but she couldn't think about that. She had to make hailee understand that she wasn't a dog that will go when called.

"So, I believe that Jacye had told you about the reason we are all here today"

"Griffen" Selena was quick respond. "Hailee" Selena greet the girl. "You might be surprised why (y/n y/Ln) is also here? Since I know you only asked for me. My point is to let you know that (y/n y/L) is the only artist I will only produce music for. Now and in the future. Beside that, no offers will be considered."

"We have no chance at all?" Griffin asked with a raise brow.

"No"

Taking a deep breath griffin looked between Selena and Y/n. He clenched his jaw before relaxing it. He was mad, but in that moment being professional was all he could do. "What a pity" He said through gritted teeth. "such a pity. Selena, I really want to work with you." He said but got no response. "Y/Ln, indeed, I didn't expect to see you here today. Please, accept my sincere apologies. I shouldn't talk about this with Selena when you're present, but I really appreciate her talent. But since she is very much attached to you, I shouldn't insist anymore, we don't wish to offend you" Griffen said, hailee scoffed.

She couldn't believe what her brother was saying. Everything that was coming out of his mouth was a lie, and she was the only one that knew. Griffin wasn't known for backing down when the heat was on, in fact he took that as a challenge. Hailee knew griffin had other ideas, but she just didn't know what.

"Y/Ln, I have to say that as an independent artist you're doing a good job. You help your friends appreciate the place they work at... You while they do everything to support your would be music career"

"Griffin" Hailee said through gritted teeth.

"No hailee its okay" Y/n said. She knew she was feeling the tension and her anxiety was at an all time high, but she couldn't just get up and leave. She needed to stay calm. She needed to hold her ground as she'd done time and time again. She needed to prove, if not to anyone, but to herself that she wasn't that timid little girl anymore. "it's true my friends have jobs, while they help support my music career. Ariana works at a cafe and Zendaya works at the gym, while Selena works at the vet hospital, but... even so they help me as much as they can and ask for nothing in return. They do this because they want to see me succeed and yeah, maybe im a bit selfish for allowing them to focus on my dream instead of theirs but... But I promised them that if and when my career takes off, I will take care of them and support their dreams next. Thats why, I will do everything in my power to make sure I become a bigger artist than anyone out there. Even Hailee Steinfeld" She mumbled the last part, almost whispering the name of the girl right in front of her.

"You're good Y/n, ill give you that... but in this industry, good isn't good enough. Let me just say this one last thing before we wrap up. We still have all the opportunities for future cooperation on many projects. And I hope (Y/n Y/Ln) won't see me as her enemy, when the chance comes."

"You're not my enemy. In my opinion its Majesty Records who treats me like an enemy." Y/n said keeping her attention on Griffin.

"Irrelevant" Griffin chuckled. "Just because we're in the same industry. I really wish from the bottom of my heart to cooperate with you." Griffin gave a cynical smile.

It made y/n tense quickly reaching over to grab Selenas hand under the table. Hailee saw the small action that went unnoticed by the rest. Something scared the girl and Hailee knew. She needed to distract y/n before it became harder for her to focus and go into sensory overload.

"What forms do you have in mind for cooperation?" Hailee asked taking a quick glance at Griffin.

"thanks but we really need to get going... we'll be taking our leave?" Selena said quickly standing up pulling y/n up with her.

"Wait" Hailee said preventing them from leaving. "There is something that I need to speak with y/n in private about" Hailee stood up from her seat.

"What do you have to say to me?" Y/n said in a soft tone, fragile and scared.

"UH..." Hailee cleared her throat. "Griffin mentioned cooperation... Im very interested in perhaps... doing a collaboration" Hailee tried to keep her voice calm and clear.

"Okay... Selena ill be back at the studio soon"

"No, I don't wanna leave you hear alone" Selena began to protest but y/n squeezed the older girls hand just a bit.

"I'll be fine." Y/n said. Selena turned her attention towards Hailee who was also looked right at her. Both felt the tension between the two of them. They both knew, but neither of them dared to say anything.

Hailee walked forward, y/n following behind, instinctively reaching for the hem of Hailees jacket. She needed that comfort and familiarity, even if it was Hailee that was providing it.

They reached Hailee's office, sitting on the couch that was facing the window. The Los Angeles building standing tall, while everything down below looked small.

"So you want to do a collaboration?" Y/n asked with a shaky voice trying to calm down. She felt good up until griffin made that smile. That smile that made her heart drop and become scared. Like if you saw your worst fears right in front of you eyes coming to life, trying to get you while being trapped. That was how y/n felt when she saw that smile. But she couldn't remember where she'd seen it before. It was a blur that memory, but the feelings were clear.

"You're not signed to a label yet, are you?" Hailee said, keeping her eyes away from y/n.

"Im meeting Rocque Records in a few days to sign the contract as well as meet their president and preform a song for her. If she likes it they said they will invest even more into making my album and other benefits" Y/n said a bit more cheerful. "Wait you're not mocking me...are you?"

"No, y/n. I just wanted to make sure you weren't second guessing yourself" Hailee said sincerely. "Look, I know you don't want to see me, but this" she guested to the both of them. "this is the only way I can talk to you"

Y/n shook her head. She was a bit annoyed, but couldn't fault the girl. Yesterday she called to meet up, and y/n declined. But she knew she couldn't avoid Hailee. "Hailee,"

"Yesterday morning, you turned me down for the first time." Hailee sighed.

"thats because I don't want to get involved with you anymore" Y/n said, but somehow, it was like neither believed those words.

"why not?" hailee was quick to respond.

"I might be wrong... I might misunderstand you. But I still need to clarify that... Im in love with someone else." Y/n firmly spoke, speaking loud and clear for the first time. Y/n needed to let her feelings, especially since she finally accepted them. So whatever she had to do, to finally get her feelings across she would do it.

Hailee clenched her jaw, and tightened her fist. She knew the answer already. She knew this was the outcome, and it only pained her more. It was like a bullet had shot through her heart. The realization that no matter what she would do from this moment onwards y/n's heart now belonged too Emily. Belong to someone that didn't exist. She lost y/n, to herself.

"who?" Hailee asked. "who do you love?" Hailee almost begged.

"Emily Martinez" Y/n smiled wide at the name that left her lips. "I love Emily"

Continue Reading

You'll Also Like

71.6K 2.4K 21
Soccer player, Jayden Swift, are best friends with Hailee Steinfeld for over six years. When the Covid decreased, Hailee brings her new co-star, Flor...
56.7K 1.4K 32
Hailee Steinfeld's assistant is in over her head with a brand new job and some very confusing feelings for her new boss. HSxReader
45.2K 1.2K 48
| completed | After two years Y/n is finally going back into the business. All beginning is already complicated again, but you promise to do better...
5K 85 18
kate bishop oneshots that i've written for tumblr <3