Ways To Annoy a Captain Swan Shipper

                                    

                                          
1. Literally all you have to do is call the ship "Hooked Swan" and they'll punch you. I promise.
                          
2. Ask them why Emma would ever date someone as evil as Killian
                          
3. Call Killian ugly. Repeatedly. Non stop. (effectiveness: 2,000,000%)
                          
4. Call Emma weak for needing a pirate to protect her
                          
5. Say they're going to break up
                          
6. Say Swan Queen is going to end up together
                          
7. Tell them Swanfire only ended because Adam, Eddy and Jen think Colin is hot
                          
8. "Emma doesn't even like Hook! She's only dating him because he pressured her into it!"
                          
9. Ask then why they haven't said "I love you," yet. (Guaranteed reaction: "GIVE THEM TIME, GOOD GOD!!!")
                          
10. Tell them the reason it took Emma so long to date Killian is because he probably stunk, wearing the same thing every day
                          
11. Call Killian childish for seeking revenge for 300 years
                          
12. Call Emma a wimp for being afraid of love for nearly 13 years
                          
13. Remind them that it took Neal dying to actually get them together (their reaction: "IT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN ANYWAY, THAT WAS JUST A BONUS!!!")
                          
14. Ask them why it wasn't a true love's kiss when Emma saved Killian from drowning
                          
15. IGNORE THEIR RANTING
                          
16. Them: How hot is Killian? *sends a picture of extremely sexy pirate*
You: 9
You: Out of a trillion
                          
17. Tell them you found a song that describes them. Tell them to listen to "Something That We're Not" by Demi Lovato or "Whattya Want From Me" by Adam Lambert. Tell them they're both in Emma's perspective.
                          
18. Tell them that the only people on the show who ever like them are, or at one point were, evil. 
Regina noticed their flirting before the even started dating. She was the evil queen. Zelena was very desperate for them to kiss. She was evil- sorry, wicked. Cora seemed to secretly ship them. She was Cora, nothing more needs to be said. Rumple called Emma Killian's girlfriend before they were officially dating. Again, nothing needs to be said for him.
                          
19. But if you want to really cut deep on the above, say Rumple later stole Killian's heart. He was about 0.02 seconds away from death. And who saved Killian's butt? BELLE. NOT EMMA. BELLE.
                          
20. "Oooh, speaking of, can you imagine Hook with Belle? They'd be adorable! Or Mary Margaret? OMG REGINA!!! Two former evil lovers facing the world together! Or Ruby? He liked Ruby! What about Granny? Let's not leave Grumpy out!!!"