Part 5: Humor in the First Degree

                                    

                                          
Snowflakes fall around us gently.
                          
Birds quietly chirp their morning greetings to the world.
                          
My frozen toes might as well have fallen off by now, but what else am I to do? 
                          
She wants to know where I stayed last night.
                          
She just said she cared.
                          
Hmmmph, as if that's true. Granger could never care for the person who ruined her life several times over. Not an ounce of that could be possible.
                          
"So?" She quietly says catching up to me, he hair tucked up tight in a bun. I have yet to see it down on her. In many of the photos taken of her in newspapers- she has it pinned up on her head- never letting a strand of it free to be seen.
                          
It's sort of sad.
                          
Not seeing her wild unruly hair- the waves that used to be gently streaked with bits of blonde. It made her look carefree and vulnerable. This...this bun or whatever it's called makes her look matronly and boring.
                          
"So what?"
                          
"Where did you stay?"
                          
"With a friend." She laughs and then looks at me.
                          
"No seriously."
                          
"Okay she wasn't my friend."
                          
"She? What was her name?" Do I hear a hint of jealousy?
                          
"Rebekah...maybe...or was it Robin?" I fuck with her. "No, it was definitely Rebekah- I remember reading it on her name tag as I tossed it to her bedroom floor." 
                          
"I state and she grits her teeth and clenches her jaw.
                          
"You slept with some random woman so you had a place to stay!!??" She yells loudly- sending the birds flying for the cityscape.
                          
"Keep your voice down, Granger. And what do you care? You're so worried I wouldn't be able to survive on my own out here- but I just changed the game." Getting in front of me- she puts her hand on my chest and looks up at me angrily.
                          
"First off- I wasn't worried!" I roll my eyes at her horrible attempt to sound sincere. "And secondly- what horrible person sleeps with some stranger so that they have a place to say the night?!"
                          
"Well as everyone already knows- I'm a horrible person and I don't see what's so wrong with killing two birds with one stone. Give me some credit for that one, Granger- I get laid, a hot meal, and a bed to sleep in at night." Growling, she shakes her head and storms off towards a bench. I follow her and sit down beside her. 
                          
"You're such a cruel insensitive user! That woman probably thinks you like her and here you're just using her!"  
                          
"Enough with the feminism and emasculating. One night stands happen all the time. Course- you probably wouldn't know that being Weaselbe probably can't get it up- let alone figure out what to do with it." I snicker and she slaps me hard across the face. The cold air causes the sting to last several minutes as my white cheek pinkens.
                          
"For you information! Ron and I are no longer together! You stupid prat!! He cheated on me with Lavender Brown! But I assume you expected that would happen, because who in their right mind would ever want a stupid workaholic MUDBLOOD!"She stands up-tears in her eyes- and marches back the way we came. 
                          
Shit.
                          
"Hermione!" I get up and try to run after her, but my cold weak bones barely get me halfway there. "Mione!!!"
                          
Following her, I try to keep track of her, but there are loads of people around us now that we're in the shopping district andI can barely keep an eye on her.