Ch 12

                                    

                                          
Zuko POV 

We had to reschedule dinner with Ozai and his new wife because of the fight I got into with Jet. It got rescheduled to tonight.
"Chin up," Uncle says as we drive to the house of my nightmares. "It won't be terrible." 
"Right," I say sarcastically. "It's just that the last interaction I had with that man was the time her melted half of my face off, so excuse me if I'm not jumping for joy." 
He pulls into the driveway and I step out of the car, feeling quite hollow as I gaze upon the house for the first time in years. Uncle notices this and places a reassuring hand on my arm.
"Let me know if it's too much," he says, "and we'll leave."
"I'm okay right now," I brush him off, cringing a little at how foreign my voice sounds to me in this moment. 
Azula is the one to open the door, and she pulls me across the threshold to gather me into a hug. I take the moment of stillness to observe the interior of the house. Not a thing has changed. It's the same furniture, same wallpaper, same chandelier that I used to wish would fall on Ozai. Nothing has been added, moved, or removed. It seems like I'm stepping back into my last day here, and all of a sudden I feel like I'm thirteen again, terrified and cold as I die alone in Ozai's office.
As Azula releases me, I see the man himself walk down the stairs- I can feel the bruises from all the times I've been dragged up or pushed down those stairs- followed closely by a woman who I can only assume is his new wife. He has not changed a bit, either. It's like he was frozen in time along with the house. 
"Iroh," he greets shortly.
"Ozai," Uncle returns his greeting in the same manner.
The woman steps forward, a warm smile plastered across her face. She seems kind, so it's a damn shame that she ended up with someone like my father.
"I'm Minerva," she says, shaking hands with Uncle first, then with me. "But most people call me Minnie. Like the mouse." 
"I am Iroh," Uncle speaks up as it becomes increasingly evident that I'm not going to say anything. "I'm Ozai's older brother. And this is Zuko." He gestures to me.
"Your son?" Minnie assumes. It's a justified assumption. Uncle is a better father to me than Ozai ever was, anyway.
"My son," Ozai corrects her quietly, and I get the strong urge to punch the man in the teeth. I haven't been his son a single day of my life. He has no claim to that title. 
--
Dinner begins as a relatively quiet event. Every so often, I catch Minnie's gaze flickering in my direction and I know she's trying not to stare at my face. I don't say anything about it. I'm used to it, honestly. I'm noticeably disfigured, so people stare. I stopped caring pretty quickly. 
Eventually, Minnie decides to strike up conversation. It probably would have been a better conversation if I didn't feel like I'd rather die than stay here another second. 
"So, Zuko," she starts. I don't even spare her a glance. "How's school?" 
"Fine." I poke distastefully at my food, more focused on the panic I'm feeling- induced by Ozai sitting right in my blind spot- than on what she's saying.
"Are you involved in any clubs?" 
"No." I know she's just trying to get to know me but I am just not in a social mood.
My complete lack of enthusiasm only encourages her to try again. "You're how old? Sixteen, seventeen?" 
"Sure." 
"Do you drive?"
I look up from my practically untouched plate and stare her right in the eye. She seems to realize what my expression implies, and quiets down awkwardly. 
"Why did we have to postpone this dinner?" Ozai asks. I'm sure he thinks the reason is that I was too scared to come here or something, so I tell him the truth.
"I got in a fight," I say, very casually.
"With whom?" he splutters, completely taken by surprise at the idea that I- who took every single punch he had to throw- would get in an actual fight.
"Someone on the football team." I shrug as if it's no big deal. It was a big deal, but only to me and only because of who it was.
He turns accusingly to Uncle, and demands, "And you didn't do anything about this?" 
"Like what?" Uncle chuckles good-naturedly. 
"Punish him?"
"Well, he's grounded." 
This isn't good enough for Ozai, and things escalate from a quiet dinner to a shouted argument. And all of a sudden, I'm ten years old and I'm watching my parents fight at the dinner table. Dinner would often end with something being thrown, usually at me or mother, depending on Ozai's mood. I'm watching plates fly and I'm drowning in a sea of angry voices.
Something hits my shin, hard, and I'm back to the present. I look across the table at Azula, who is frowning at me, concerned. 
And no one is yelling. Ozai and Uncle are both standing, but they're quiet. 
"We'll be leaving now." Uncle pats my shoulder, prompting me to stand as well. He apologizes to Minnie for causing such a disaster, and we exit the house.
We're in the car and a few miles away before he starts talking again.
"I'm sorry," he apologizes sincerely. "I shouldn't have put you in that situation-"
"I thought I was ready," I interrupt. "It's not your fault. I thought I would be ready to see him again- to be in that house again- but..." 
"You don't have to get over this, Zuko. You don't have to forgive your father. You can cut him out of your life and no one will think less of you for it."
It's comforting to hear, especially from a man who preaches forgiveness like his life depends on it. I've always appreciated Uncle for being the only family member who didn't tell me that I would forgive Ozai, or that someday I would understand why he hurt me. I don't care why, and I won't forgive him.


(Ngl I forgot that I write)