Eighteen

                                    

                                          
<<C.H. POV>>
*one week later*
I slowly walk over to my stereo and turn down the music. My head was already pounding, the music just made it worse.
I had been spending the past week in my apartment. Take out food every night and left overs for everything else. I probably reeked, I hadn't showered in a few days. All I wanted to do was sit around and sulk and I didn't understand why. My thoughts have been consuming me but with what, I'm not sure I even know. 
The thing that I do know is that Julia was a mistake. All I ever do is hurt people, why did I even try to make things work with us when it wouldn't. I've only hurt myself and her, what good has come out of this?
But in the back of my mind all I can think about is the good of her. 
The way her nose scrunches when she laughs.
Her light sense of adventure.
The way she dances when no one is watching.
How she was the most beautiful girl I had ever met.
                          
And I f**king ruined it. Everything I ever had with this girl is gone because of a dumb mistake.
                          
There's a pounding on my door. I glance at it but decide to ignore it. 
"Calum it's Luke!" I hear.
"I'm not in the mood!" I yell back and close my blinds. 
I step over DVD cases and empty beer bottles as I make my way to the door to shoo Luke away. 
He barges through the door anyways with his two friends Ashton and Michael by his side.
"Okay what's going on dude?" Luke asks giving me a wtf expression.
I shrug and walk into the kitchen to grab another drink. I take the last one from the fridge and pop the top off. 
I bring it up to my lips before Michael grabs it from my hands and starts pouring it down the drain.
"What the f**k man?" I say shoving him aside.
"Calum, talk to us." Luke says steering me towards the couch and making me sit down. A feel extra Doritos crush under me as I move to talk to the guys.
"I... I kissed Julia." I admit and run a hand through my hair.
"Wow... Okay..." Luke says but I don't look up at him.
"Um... Wait so why is this such a big problem that you have to miss work and sit in your apartment for a week and smell like a drunk man threw up all over you?" Ashton asks and I look up and glare.
"What? I'm just asking!" Ashton says throwing his hands up in the air in defense.
"Because after that... I walked out and she got upset and I was mad at myself and I screwed everything up and..."
"Have you tried talking to her about it?" Michael asks.
"No." I murmur. "I've been avoiding her. She sat outside my door all night trying to talk to me about it but I just couldn't handle it." 
Luke slaps his hand against the coffee table and stands up.
"What are you doing man? She still likes you! You have to go talk to her right now you can't just avoid her forever!" He shouts.
I rub my fingers against my temple. 
"Geez..." I mutter and stand up, walking towards the kitchen.
"I can't go talk to her, it's too late she probably hates me." 
"If she hated you why did she show up at your door begging to talk to you?" Michael says. I just keep shaking my head. 
Luke sighs loudly and grabs his jacket. I'm going to go get us some lunch I'll be back in about... Um.... An hour." And with that he walks out the door leaving me with his two weird friends.
                          
<<J.A. POV>>
I hear a knock at my door and put my coffee cup down. I sit for a moment and just stare at the door. I was hoping and dreading that it was Calum but I tiptoed over to the door and look out the peep hole. 
My co-worker Luke stands outside. I pause before opening it.
I give him a puzzled look.
"Julia, hey." 
"Hi? Come in I guess, sorry it's kind of a mess..." I say looking around at all the food wrappers and empty tissue boxes and tissues laying around. 
"Sorry, it's been a long week..." I sigh and give a small laugh.
"I know." He says and takes a seat on the edge of my couch arm. 
"Do you have feelings for Calum?" He blurts out and I'm taken aback by his forwardness.
"Um... Yeah I guess. I'd be fine with us just as friends but we're not talking right now. Well, he's not talking. I stopped trying to talk to him because I don't think he's listening. I've been talking to a door." I ramble and take a shaky breath.
"Trust me, he likes you." He says looking down at me from where I had made myself comfortable again on the couch.
"What?" I question.
"He's afraid of being hurt and hurting you. He doesn't know what to do. He's being stupid. You're the smart one right now you need to fix this." 
"I need to fix this?!" I say. 
Now I was just angry.
"Why should I be the one to fix this? He's the one who needs to grow a pair and realize what he wants." I say thinking out loud. 
"And maybe you're wrong. Maybe he used to like me and he's now realizing what he wants and he wants to get away from me. I'm done trying Luke, I'm done. All that this is doing is hurting me and apparently him too." 
I take a deep breath.
"Ugh you guys are killing me. You both need to get up off your lazy asses and fix this. Julia, he's miserable. He's been drinking away each day for the past week trying to get away from the thought of you!" Luke says raising his voice.
I get up from my spot on the couch.
"Wow! That makes me feel great. He's trying to forget me for a reason!" I shout and walk into the kitchen to get myself a glass of water.
"This is bull crap." I mutter, slamming my glass onto the counter.
Luke walks over to me.
"You both just need to talk. Can you at least tell me if there's hope for you guys?" 
I just shake my head. 
"I don't even know... Me and him got really close I don't think that this is the end for us. If it is, so be it but I need him to  tell me to move on... Other wise neither of us will have closure. But it's up to him because I'm done. Now if you'll excuse me I have another season of Friends to continue watching thank you." I say walking back over to my spot on the couch and press play on the remote.
I see that Luke is watching me but he finally walks back out the door and quietly closes it behind him.
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I think this is one of my longest chapters wow. 
Hahah I hope no one hates me for this don't worry things get fixed soon;P
Who misses Jalum because I do!
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And add my other story Keeping Afloat as well as this one :)
Thanks you so much for all the support!
//S