Calum's POV
"I can't believe you'd do that, Calum!"
I wiggled out of my exploding best friend's grip and shrugged everything off. Picking out another cigarette and lighting it up.
"Stop that!" Luke slapped my hand away, making the things i held fall. I don't see why he was being such a dick. Or maybe I was, either way he's being annoying as fuck. I rolled my eyes and stormed out of the room.
"Calum! Can you please just stay? We need to talk about this." He said sternly.
I stopped on my tracks and sat back on the edge of my bed motioning for him to start talking. I wasn't interested into whatever he had to say, to be honest.
"What would Alesia think about this? Do you even know who Alesia is anymore?", I let out a groan. I haven't heard from her in months, "you haven't even checked up on her, tell me what the hell is going on?"
"Why do you even care? Its basically none of your business" I snapped at him. I wasn't in the actual mood of talking about Alesia.
I know. I'm fucked up. What happened? I don't even know either. It's been a month since I last heard her voice. I haven't had the strength to call her nor check up on her. I don't even know why. I've been getting drunk lately, I've been acting like shit. I'm useless at the moment. No one seemed to want to listen to me other than Luke, I honestly thank him for his attitude right now.
I ran a hand through my hair and buried my head on them. I let out a loud groan before tears spilled out of my eyes. I've never had breakdowns before and I guess this will be the first and last, I hope. The bed deepened, telling me that Luke has sat beside me. A hand rubbed around my back in a circular motion as I sniffed and watched the tears falling from my eyes to the floor.
"tell me all about it, Calum"
"I didn't want to miss Alesia. It drives me crazy thinking about her being alone. Not having me by her side. What if guys make a move on her or hurt her, I can't let that happen. I'm useless when I'm not with her. I'm just not me. So I wanted to take my mind off of things and I don't want to feel like I'm such a weak person so I did these shit that I'm doing. I'm sorry, Luke. I'm really sorry, I've been a dick. And Alesia must've hate me now. She hates me. You hate me. I hate me. Everybody hates me. I hate myself."
"I don't hate you, Calum. I can never hate you. Come on, pick yourself up" he said softly, "call Alesia. You need her"
I nodded my head before fixing myself up as Luke made his way into the bathroom. I called Alesia and waited for the third ring before she spoke up.
"Hey, saw you on tv the other day" she said plainly. I sense she had a sad smile plastered on her face right now.
"Ally, I miss you so much I just really don't know what to do anymore" I choked as the tears ran back. She tried soothing me with her gentle voice, which somehow worked.
"I miss you too, baby. It's okay. I understand. I know you want someone to cuddle or hug with, whatever. You can use Luke though, so it would lessen a bit of the jealousy"
I chuckled at her reply as I sniffed between words, "I'm sorry I haven't called in a while"
"Like I said, it's okay. I love you, Cal" she said softly, shuffling around at the process.
"Its been 4 months, i wanna go back home" I groaned, "I want you to go home" i heard her mumble. I wasn't meant to hear that I guess.
"I love you, Calum. I have to get to my class now" she said in a hurry.
"Fucking time zones making me confused as heck" I rolled my eyes.
"Good night, Cal. Get some sleep" she said then hung up. I threw my phone on bed as I collapsed as well. I buried my head on my pillow.
