Chasing Memoirs For You (I-Land EJ)

                                    

                                          
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Is it just me or the reads in my every story is getting fewer and fewer day by day?
Where are all of you going?😅
Is my stories getting boring?
I love you guys. Please don't leave me here.
By the way, this one is requested as well.
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FACT:
Some times the people who don't want to talk to you are the ones that really want to.
ANOTHER FACT:
You've fallen for someone who will never be brave enough to fall for you.
THIRD FACT ABOUT EJ:
He gets the saying of confess you're feelings before it's too late and now she's gone in his life.
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Who am I? 
I am Byung Euijoong. Once I was this young introverted guy in our School. Like what you kind of expected with my likes, I only have few friends, Jake and Sunghoon were the only one who stayed until the end. We called ourselves the '02 liners then, and even to this day, They were still visiting me on my farm house, distracting me for a few good hours until they needed to go back to their families.
They have wives and childrens. I have none. I only have regrets and memories in the past. It will forever haunt me. Wherever I go and think to be alone, the ghost of you will going to jump out on me, the tears in your eyes at your last day, the smoothness of your bald head, the dry lips saying your farewell towards me.
You loved me for real. You can never love any guy other than me. You in your highschool uniform, the seventeen year old you, is always the first thing I will see in the Classroom saying hello at the morning and see you again at the afternoon. 
The last thing I would see of you is at the hospital, waiting for your time to come up in the promise light of ultimate peacefulness and in the place where you wouldn't feel pain again in your head, killing you everyday even if they put you in chemos and meds. It doesn't make it better for you. It only get worse and your body have change from being this energetic girl lunging herself to a fragile girl as a glass reaching out for me in vain.
  Your mother and my friends only begged me to visit you. At first, I was scared to show up my face thinking you will hate my being there when all I did in School is runaway whenever you are approaching. You scared me to a lot of things.
But you scared me the most when you cried at my appearance in the I.C.U, hating it for me to see you in what you said is your ugliest face and loving it because I was one of the reasons you want to survive the cancer.
You said to me that you wanted to live. In case, I was still searching for a wife and you will wait for me to see you at the corner, forever wishing to notice you among the other girls out there.
I do notice you. A lot. Every damn time. You were the only one looking pass beyond Jake and Sunghoon who are more handsome and popular. I am only a shadow behind them but for you, the crazy girl for everyone, see me and notice me.