Chapter 38

                                    

                                          
I walked back and forth in my room, waiting for Zayn, or atleast some information about him. The way he just left scared me. I kept calling him and sending him voicemails, but there was no answer. I didn't wanted to cry, but the tears won't stop flowing. I hurt him, which hurt me too.
                          
"Aisha, you should take some rest.. It's past midnight." I ignored the statement Jenna said and continued pacing. "Aisha, I said something." She said again. I rolled my eyes and faced her.
                          
"Jenna, even you know I was never unconscious, I'm not weak, I don't need rest. I only need-"
                          
"You only need Zayn to be safe. I know. You were not in a coma, but the head injury you have is real. You do need rest." She said in a convincing tone. I shook my head and looked at my phone, hoping that I got some message from Zayn, Liam, or anyone else who was searching for Zayn.
                          
My eyes teared up as I found nothing. I was getting restless. Maybe I spoke too much. Maybe I shouldn't have slapped him. Maybe I shouldn't have told him to leave. I should've watched my words. I shouldn't have taken out my anger for Rohan on Zayn. Why am I so stupid?!
                          


                          
"Ash, are you gonna listen to me?!" Jenna asked frustratingly. I turned to her with tears in my eyes.
                          
"No, I'm not! Not till I know Zayn is safe! Don't you understand Jenna? This is happening because of me! Do you really think I'll take rest when no one knows where he is?! I'll not!!" I said, making her flinch at my sudden outburst. My head started pounding in pain, making me hiss. My hand went straight to my head.
                          
Jenna rushed towards me. "I told you to rest, you are not fully recovered. Please listen to me!" She said, as she held me, and made me sit on the bed. She handed me painkillers, I glared at her, but she gave me a pleading look in return. I sighed and took the pills.
                          
"Can you please.. leave? I need some time alone.." I requested. I wasn't being rude to her, I really needed time for myself. I needed to clear my head. Everything was just.. so overwhelming. She gave me a slight smile and nodded.
                          


                          
I heard a slight slam after some time, indicating I was alone in the room. The painkillers were doing their work, the pain was started to reduce. I got up again and switched the lights off, pacing in the room, taking deep breaths. Everything that was happening was just scaring me right now.
                          
I decided to send one more voicemail. I took a deep breath to prevent myself from crying. "Zayn.. I-It's Ash.. Can you p-please come back?" My voice started shaking as tears brimmed my eyes. Why can't they just stop?
                          
"Please.. everyone is worried. I-I'm worried too.. I-I do care for y-you.. You love me right? Come back for m-me? Please?" I managed to say, but mentally cursed myself for saying that. I was giving him hope by saying that.
                          
I kept my phone aside as I knew I was going to cry. My hands held my face as I silently cried. I wish I never said those words to him. I wish I just told everyone about the threats. I wish I never toured with them. I wish I never fell in love with him. I wish I never even met him. Atleast that would hurt less.
                          


                          
"Jenna, I told you I needed some time.." I said through my cries as I heard the door open and close again. Why can't she understand? 
                          
My breath hitched as two arms rested around my waist. Is that.. Is that really him? Then, a kiss was placed against my neck, making me shiver. Someone rested their chin on my shoulder.
                          
"Zayn? Is that you?" I asked hopefully, and received a hum in response. I left a breath in relief. He was here.. He was safe... Nothing happened to him. I became sad as it clicked, I can't be with him, like this. I have to push him away.