Truth of Emerald

                                    

                                          
Even if her world becomes bleak, her soul would remain unsoiled. It could be the god's whim for making her to live her second life. It could be the god's generosity to let her meet her most beloved man from the past. But then, for her to live whilst enduring the guilt over many deaths, to be the wise-man of the creature than born from darkness, what sorts of plan does the gods have for her?
                          
"... Shun... You... You must've had think this through since the start, didn't you? " 
When the cat finally out of the bag, the disbelieve in Okita's eyes take over Shun's heart.
                          
" W-wait! Souji, I know how awful my action is towards Chizuru, but... I can't afford to lose the Shinsengumi... not ever in my watch. "
She gritted her teeth in desperation, or it might've been just disgust out of herself for still dare to use her lame excuses.
                          
"...I... I get it, but... shit... You're really planning to sell her out like that? Do you realise how the captains will think about that? "
Okita grimaced but those feelings isn't for the moral of selling Chizuru out, but how he had let Shun on this alone without anyone to rely on. 
                          
" Souji... your first kill was one of Kondou-san's friend who's planning to backstab him, wasn't it? Then I am, too, ready to get rid anyone who dare to bring harm to the people I hold dear. "
                          
" This isn't about who are you killing, Shun! You've been scheming all of this alone with the thought of sacrificing yourself in the end, right?! "
                          
"..."
Souji hit the bullseye which makes him even more in distress.
                          
" You--! Gah! Damnit! "
The bloated anger finally released in one go as he hit the table. Though it was only half the amount of his stress.
                          
Shun is ridden by guilt, but honestly, she doesn't even know what exactly makes him so angry. 
" I don't understand what are you being so angry for? I told you already about my plan and not holding a secret from you. There are even things that I haven't told Hijikata yet and I still let you hear it first. " 
                          
As if acting to defend herself from Okita's anger, she clenched her fist as her eyes looking straight to his. There's an ounce of fear in her eyes, but her determination is still as bright as how Okita remembered.  
                          
There are some truth in her words, he thought. But what's stirring him up is probably not because how dangerous or cowardly her plan is. It's most likely the thought that Shun planned all of this by herself with the thought of sacrificing herself... which means leaving him. 
                          
" ...Hah... forget it, I was just being a kid there. The thought of you're going to sacrifice yourself just for this careless plan of yours is making me angry, but what's even more sick is how I'd be helplessly letting you go without knowing anything. If at that time you didn't tell the truth to me, I'd probably hate myself instead for the rest of my life. "
His eyes are telling the truth, the painful truth. Somewhere in his mind, he plays a scenario where he has to watch Shun die while being ignorant.
                          
If it's someone else, he won't even bother to think the reason of someone's death besides bathing his sword in his enemy's blood. But when it comes to Shun, he wants to know—no, its more like he has to know the reason behind of her every action. 
                          
Looking at Okita suddenly become silent with a regretful face, Shun's heart tightened with a force that gradually she enjoys. When that nostalgic feeling suddenly knocked on her hearts, the memories that lie deep in her heart capriciously overlapped with Okita right now. 
                          
..............................................................................
                          
"  Why didn't you tell me you had to go to dinner gathering with your division yesterday? I could eat by myself just fine. Stop sacrificing yourself like this. "