Desperation

                                    

                                          
i wasn't planning on publishing this so early... but oh well, a treat? ❤️
                          
"Freddie stop!" you blurted in tears as he clutched onto your sleeve.
                          
"Don't leave me [Y/N]! Don't! I n-need you! You can't leave me!" he cried in desperation. 
                          
Tears streamed down his face as you tried to pull away. It was a long story, but in short you had to break up with Freddie, as much as you didn't want to. He didn't know why, all he knew was that you were trying to break up with him.
                          
He sobbed loudly, hugging you close to him tightly. "You can't leave me! You can't! We're together! We love each other- You can't!" he continued to cry, burying his head in your shoulder, his whole body shaking as his heart shattered.
                          
"I have to," you whispered, tears coming out of your eyes.
                          
"Wh-What? Am I that repulsive? You have to? What's happening? I thought it was me and you? Forever?" he released you from his embrace as looked at you dead on in the eyes, his hands on either side of your head.
                          
You tried to avoid his gaze as much as you could. "Look at me! LOOK AT ME!" he shouted, scaring you slightly.
                          
You met eyes with his bloodshot ones, those dark brown eyes looked so sad, so empty. Those eyes you loved so much. 
                          
His nose was slightly red as he sniffled, the tip of it glistening with tears. 
                          
His lips were quivering and his teeth were sticking out slightly.
                          
Knowing you would be causing both of you more pain, you couldn't help but let yourself go completely, breaking down and hugging Freddie, his head against your chest as you both cried. His arms wrapped around your waist as you buried your face into his long hair.
                          
"Does this mean you'll stay?" he whispered. Those words broke you because you knew you wouldn't. You couldn't.
                          
"No..." you mumbled, however you didn't let go.
                          
He didn't say anything back except you felt his body jump every few seconds, his choppy breaths rattling throughout him. You felt the vibrations of his cries against your chest as he tried to muffle them.
                          
You pulled away, turning away too.
                          
"No [Y/N]!" Freddie roared, clawing the fabric of tbe clothes on your back, loud breaths and sobs erupting from him. You took a few steps away, breaking his grip on you slowly, trying to stop the tears from rolling down your face.
                          
"Don't do this to me," he said quietly. Yes, you loved him. You loved him so fucking much, and you never wanted to leave him, ever.
                          
Walking towards the door, you shut your eyes as hard as you could, trying to block out everything, wishing this wasn't happening. You didn't know if you could ever come back to Freddie or not. You put your shaking hand on the door knob.
                          
"Please," he cried, his voice breaking as he said that one word with so much desperation.
                          
More tears streamed down your face as you turned and looked at the man you loved so desperately. He looked to sad. So worn.
                          
You nodded slowly, trying to smile but your face really just crumpled up. You couldn't leave him. How could you? You had to stay. 
                          
He let out another cry and an extremely sad smile spread on his face when you walked back over to him. He leaned down and wrapped his arms around your waist, picking you up and burrowed his face into your hair and neck.
                          
You couldn't help but wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him even closer as you both sniffled and smiled.
                          
"I love you, Freddie. I'm sorry - I wasn't doing any of that in spitefulness or-or- to leave you or- to hurt you- I-" you stumbled, clutching onto him tightly as he nodded.
                          
"I love you [Y/N]. If you leave me- I- I'll- Fuck - I don't know what I'll do," he was clearly on edge by his stutter. His arms held around your waist even tighter as he cuddled you, never wanting to let go.
                          
You had never seen him so sad before, that desperation and the tears streaming from his face... You felt so bad. He repeated whispering 'I love you's as he clutched onto you with need. 
                          
You love him, how could you not?
                          
I KEEP WRITING SAD CHAPTERS I DON'T KNOW WHY-
i'll make up for it with happy ones i promise!
also, this is mildly inspired by Original-Mikaelson 's story, Killer Queens. i guess you can tie the backstory of this to that