Heart of Darkness

                                    

                                          
A/n Warning: suicide attempt, depression and anxiety. Don't read if you get triggered by this kind of thing.
Posted: 9th August 2020. 
                          
There's a voice in my head, 
says I'm better off dead. 
But if I sing along, 
a little fucking louder. 
To a happy song, I'll be alright. 
                          
Roselyn's POV.
It's now December 14th and I've been feeling worse than usual, honestly despite wanting to get my O.W.Ls and N.E.W.Ts, I'm really on the edge, wanting it all to be over. To feel relief as my last breath slips away. As my last tear is cried. As my crimson blood floods my bed. Classes are now other for the day so I run to my form before anyone is there, quickly doing all my homework. Then I lay on my bed pulling my tie as tight as possible, then even tighter just to make it end faster, stopping my breathing and making me fall into a state of only slight consciousness. Before all I see is darkness and hear shouting, and then nothing. 
                          
  *Time Skip brought to you by the only thing that confused 12 year old Harry at the Burrow was everyone
     seemed to like him*.
                          
Roselyn's POV.
My eyes begin opening and I see extreme light causing me to shut them again. I feel something walk from the bottom of the bed to my stomach, opening my eyes again this time much more carefully and see Siri. Pulling him into a tight hug just as people walk in and I look up, seeing Madam Pomfrey standing there before handing me some medicine and ordering I have them immediately before leaving to alert my family I'm awake, family clearly being the Tonks and Weasley family. As I sit waiting in comes Tonks, Aunt Andie and Uncle Ted each reacting different Tonks doing an Irish jig happily since I'm awake, Uncle Ted pulling me into a hug tearfully causing me to feel bad for worrying them and Aunt Andie to begin lecturing me about scaring them before also pulling me into a hug. Then comes the Weasleys, first Bill, Mrs and Mr Weasley, then the twins and Lee, Ginny and Aphrodite. Finally Ron, Hermione and Harry come in and after talking and me making up the excuse that I accidentally did my tie a bit too tight which everyone seemed to believe but of course Madam Pomfrey, Izzy and obviously Siri who gave me a sceptical look which doesn't surprise me - since animals are extremely intelligent. After around an hour of talking I ask Madam Pomfrey if I'm aloud to leave, but she says so long as I'm with one of the others. We all leave the Hospital Wing going different ways, Bill, Mr and Mrs Weasley going to floo back to the Burrow, Aunt Andie and Uncle Ted going to there house and all the others besides Izzy and Tonks going to their common room. Tonks, Isobel and I walk to the from door until I'm stopped by Neville pulling me into a hug and soon followed by Terry muttering about how worried he was and if he'd ever see me again. After some silence at the Black Lake, Tonks asks "Do you two wanna go to the forbidden forest?" and I'm about to protest but stop and decide to go since I want to see the Thestrals again. As we go to the forbidden forest after making a quick stop at the kitchens, I stop a bit in and see the Thestrals so I walk over, petting each gently as to not scare them away. Then I pull out some raw meat I got from the kitchen, feeding them all equally so I show no favouritism. Finally it begins to get dark and I suggest we go back up, once at the castle Tonks separates from Isobel and I. After I say goodbye to Isobel I go to Ravenclaw Tower, and then my dormitory where I lock myself into the bathroom to the right, closer to my bed. Opening my bag I retrieve one of the blades as I hum a melody softly, trying to ignore the feeling of guilt in my stomach at lying to everyone. 
                          
A/n short I know but I promise they'll be longer.