Things were never really over. Nothing in his world had ever had a distinct beginning and ending. There were no middles, filled with twist and turns, with bumps in the road that eventually lead to a happy outcome. There was just existing, and he supposed, on some level, that was enough.
There was no one to look cute for - did Taehying even live there anymore? Or was he just paying really expensive rent on an over stuffed closet? - so he didn't even try.
Taking a bath instead of a shower always seemed like so much work, but he had used one of his favorite bath bombs and far too many bubbles, and it left his skin feeling soft and lightly scented with a mixture of deep amber and bright cherries. He deep conditioned his hair, leaving the strands so silky they shone even under the soft yellow light of the lamps he used. Wrapped himself in warm leggings and slipped into that thick hoodie and placed himself onto the couch, curled up in a tight little ball with a pint of ice cream in his hands and his favorite drama playing.
Pathetic. It was so pathetic. But at least he knew the exact word for it. At least he knew that h had chosen this and hadn't simply been relegated to it through sheer lack of other options.
This was actually better than the other options. And there was a certain amount of comfort to be found in that.
The opening credits had just begun playing on the second episode when the sound of a knock broke through, and he sighed heavily as he realized it was coming from his door instead of someone else's. Chances were it was simply someone looking for someone else who had gotten the wrong door. Or someone looking for Taehyung. Or some wayward delivery person who had been given the wrong address.
There were so many things it could have been. Should have been. He would have preferred anything in the world over what it was.
Because he felt it. That gut deep reaction the moment the sight was revealed to him. And he knew there was no way he was strong enough to actually say no.
"What are you doing here?" He tried to sound annoyed. He did. But it just sounded tired. Tired and sad and some other emotion he didn't want to think about. Definitely not happiness because that would be ridiculous.
"Apologizing." God he hated that voice. That soft quality that it took on. How it sunk right down into his very soul and made him feel things he didn't want to acknowledge. Hated how it felt like it was slowly melting the ice he had allowed to build up around his heart.
Jungkook looked incredible. A sea of black from head to toe. Black jeans that were obviously designed to be so tight they left nothing to the imagination. Ripped across the knees and smoothing up into muscle thighs and he shouldn't look. He should not. They ended in black combat boots that looked like they could crush mountains if only he took a big enough step. There was an over sized black hoodie - a distinct contrast to his baby blue one, but the two colors complimented each other in a way he couldn't help but notice - the hood tugged up around his head. Dark hair hung low, obscuring one of his eyes while the other seemed to dance in the harsh over head light.
Grasped gently within his hands was a bouquet of white wild orchids, and silently he wondered if there was deep meaning behind them as well. But he knew he was about to find out, despite the way he was sure he didn't want to know that either.
"Do you know what these mean?" Probably that he was about to do something he was going to regret. Something else he was going to regret. Because right now he was definitely cursing himself for answering the door.
"No." Of course he didn't. And it should have shocking that Jungkook apparently knew so much about flowers and all of their meanings. It shouldn't cause a sharp pain to develop deep within his chest as he wondered just how he had come by all of that knowledge.
