Chapter 7

                                    

                                          
Jaydon~ 
                          
Elijah P.O.V
                          
After eating, I put my dishes in the dishwasher and go upstair without waiting for my adoptive parents to say anything. If I let them the time, they will ask me to join them to play some board games all night long. I will feel too much out of place if I agree, watching from the sidelines as the happy couple and gorgeous sons laugh along while I drown myself in self-hate. I don't want to taint them with my pessimistic attitude and self-destruction. They don't deserve to be put in a world like mine, where I always feel as if I'm suffocating, as if I'm never going to get out of the cold river of misery I fell in. Only darkness surrounding me, the cold slipping in my body and chilling my bones, the noiseless surroundings slowly driving me crazy and the loneliness making me talk to the voices inside my head. Although they tell me bad things, even if it will only lead me to my death, sometimes turning crazy is better than being lonely. 
                          
How I wish I can just deal with it, accept my fate, but in the end I'm just a poor little boy who want someone to talk to. Someone to love him for who he is. Like 'he' did. 'He' just didn't like me in the right way and it broke me. Everyone always tell me that I have a family that loves me, teachers who want to listen and people ready to help, but not being alone doesn't mean I'm not lonely. Have you never felt as if you were all alone in the world, while you were surrounded by a crowd? You can only see dark faces, masked with smiles. You can only hear buzzing, like an old radio put on a wrong channel, when someone talks to you. You can only feel the cold giving you goosebumps, while the warm body of a relative hugs you. The only thing keeping you in this illusory world is the small voice inside your head, telling you to stay here and see if you can once again see the genuine smiles behind the fake ones, hear the gentle voice full of real concern, feel the serene warmth of an embrace. Maybe you won't ever be able to, maybe it is just false hope, maybe it doesn't matter, maybe you will find nothing but an even greater despair at the end of the road and maybe you will regret even trying. However, if you don't try you won't ever know. You will miss the only opportunity to feel alright again. I want to try, I want to believe once again. Like I did before meeting 'him'.
                          
***
School is back, which means more socialization. I have only one week left before I can leave this hell. No more beating, no more escaping family things and no more chance of seeing 'him' again. I will be gone, my past will be gone. I will start anew, like it was all just a bad dream. Only one week before the shackles pulling me down the river break. For once in my life, I will be free.
                          
We are supposed to go look for a dog after my classes today. The twins will sadly be the ones to go with me, because Samuel was suddenly asked to meet with an important customer and Alexander has an urgent meeting with a nearby pack. I can't believe I will be stuck with my two tormentors all the way to the pet therapy center, then while I pick my new dog and for the ride back. It will be hell. 
                          
The twins are only fourteen years old, but Alphas grow faster so they normally get their driving license at twelve years old.
                          
I enter my last classroom of the day and go sit in the back, not to appear cool, but because I don't like having people behind me. It makes me feel insecure. The teacher comes in the room and everyone shut their mouths. Finally some peace. The lady starts to speak about something, but I can't hear her. I'm way too in my mind to pay attention.
                          
I wonder how things will go with the twins…
                          
Hey dear readers, this chapter was really fun to write. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
                          
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(707 words)