Chapter 9: Instincts

                                    

                                          
" Yeah, you still got it!"
☆
                          
Toby takes a huge sigh as he enters his apartment. He places the spare helmet on the table, his keys on the side. He looks in the mirror at his sleek appearance. 
                          
Well this was all for nothing!
                          
He thinks, rubbing his hands through his hair and retrieving his glasses from their case placed on the small side table. He goes into his bedroom and pulls out his comfy joggers and hoodie, hanging his smarter clothes away.  He chuckles sadistically to himself. Who was he kidding! As if anyone would really be interested in a sad book geek with a weird interest in the mysterious!
                          
He heads back to the kitchen and grabs a juice from the fridge before flopping down on a kitchen chair. Toby stares at the helmet. He would have to see John again to give it back and that in itself would be really awkward. He grabs his phone from the side, finding 'Blood guy' from his messages. 
                          
Hi...so I still have your helmet. I'm apartment 45 or if you'd prefer you can collect it from the library. I'm in work tomorrow. 
                          
Toby presses send and sighs.... he waits a good 10 minutes, looking at his phone. No reply. Toby wasn't really surprised. He knew he'd frightened John off with that stupid kiss.
                          
----^----
                          
John speeds home as quick as he can. Just getting a bit further away from Toby helped just a little. He frantically gets through his apartment door and heads straight to the fridge. He grabs the first bag of blood he can get his hands on and rips the top clean off before taking it to his mouth. He gulps it down without taking a breath, trickles of blood dripping down his neck and chin. He discards the bag to the floor and takes out another one. Tearing it open and consuming it whole. He moans in satisfaction. It's just what John needs right now. He lets the second bag fall and wipes his blood soaked mouth with his sleeve. He grabs a hold of the counter, catching his breath. 
                          
He was so close to losing it. So close to doing what he craved with Toby. John never really knew any of his past blood victims. It was a necessity, a means to an end. His end. But Toby,  Toby is different. Toby is someone he likes, appreciates, possibly has more feelings for than he cares to admit.  It pained him that he'd left the way he did. Toby had done nothing wrong, if anything he'd done everything right. 
                          
John sighs, clearing away the bloody mess he'd left in the kitchen. Then heads for a shower. The water cascading over his head was soothing. John's mind becoming clearer, the blood now deep within his system. 
                          
He gets out and dries himself off. Before changing into a fresh set of clothes. John checks his phone. He has a message from 'The librarian'
                          
Hi...so I still have your helmet. I'm apartment 45 or if you'd prefer you can collect it from the library. I'm in work tomorrow. 
                          
John reads the message and sits on the bed weighing out his options. He'd just had two full bags of blood. He felt in control. John hated how he'd left things with Toby, but he knew, or at least sensed that Toby felt different towards him now. This would now always be there to a certain degree, enticing him. 
                          
He didn't want to overthink this. John stands up, gets his boots and jacket and grabs his keys. He needed to at least clear the air with Toby.
                          
---*---
                          
Toby picks up his phone. Should he send another message?  Maybe he should apologise for the ill timing of the kiss. Maybe he should laugh it off, pretend that he was just fooling about. Toby is about to type his first word when his doorbell rings. He places his phone back down on the table and gets up to answer the door. 
                          
He opens it to see John standing there. Toby's heart instantly spikes at the sight of him. "John... I... come in!" Toby steps to one side letting John into his apartment. 
                          
John instantly feels the faint aroma coming off of Toby in light waves. It's just about bearable... just about. "I got your message. I came for my helmet." 
                          
Toby looks over to the helmet resting on the table. He grabs it and hands it to John. "Sorry I didn't mean to hold on to it."
                          
"No it's my fault." John begins. "I shouldn't have rushed off." John can now feel his own heart beat quicken. This felt different from those times before. A different kind of feeling. A more human feeling. Not entirely lustful but more of an element of affection. "You've changed your clothes." John comments smiling. 
                          
"Yeah. I'm not heading out again today." Toby forces a smile. He steps forward, just a little. "I'm sorry. You know about the kiss." He looks down taking a sigh. "I thought... well it doesn't matter what I thought. I was wrong."
                          
"No." John interrupts.
                          
"What?" Toby looks up again,  looking John in the face. 
                          
"You weren't wrong, it's just...I..." John stops. He can't explain this. Can't explain that he craves Toby in a way that's sub human.
                          
"Have you been with a guy before?" Toby asks nervously. 
                          
"Well...not really." John confesses. But that's not the reason. Not at all. 
                          
"I can take it slow?" Toby suggests, edging closer. 
                          
John was now losing the urge to fight. Toby's aroma overpowering him. He looks at Toby's soft lips. So...so tempting. Toby places a hand on John's cheek. His breath quickening once again as he edges closer to John's lips. John gives in, closing his eyes, feeling the presence of Toby's lips upon his. 
                          
John no longer holds back, dropping the helmet on the floor and pulling Toby closer by the waist. The kiss feels warm and gentle. Not like the lust filled kisses when John was desperate to feed. He could do this. He could kiss Toby and not morph into his other self. 
                          
Toby runs a hand through John's soft black hair. He was right about his instincts. He knew it! Toby smiles into the kiss at his own smugness and for how John feels against his lips. 
                          
John pulls away. Aware that he doesn't want to get carried away and let what is a tender moment, suddenly backfire. "I have to go, but I'll call you!"
                          
"Ok" Toby smiles widely, biting on his lower lip. He bends down to retrieve the helmet off of the floor. "Don't forget this!" 
                          
"Thanks!" John smiles, taking the helmet from Toby once again before heading for the door. 
                          
Toby closes the door smiling to himself. He puts his fingers onto his lips. He can still feel them tingling from the kiss moments before.  "Yeah!" He says to himself. "You still got it!" 
                          
John heads back to his bike. Still buzzing from the kiss. Did he regret it? Hell no! But he still felt a little uneasy. Was whatever this was with Toby even going to work? Had he just been lucky? The recent intake of blood keeping the beast at bay? It was now more important than ever to get his blood urges under control.