12 ~ Do souls have to social distance?

                                    

                                          
To say Hades was mad was an understatement.
                          
He stormed into the Solstice meeting 20 minutes late. His hair was sticking straight up, his clothes were dirty, his tie was askew, and there were deep bags under his eyes. After all, a god's appearance reflects the condition of their realm.
                          
"Hades!" Zeus frowned. "Brother, having a throne is a responsibility. You can't just swan up to meetings-"
                          
"WHO RELEASED COVID-19?" the lord of the underworld bellowed, fire flaring in the depths of his dark eyes.
                          
"I know this is your first meeting, but there is an agenda and we have to stay civil otherw-"
                          
"CIVIL?" Hades roared. "Civil! You think it's civil to let somebody release an experiment that starts a global pandemic? I don't think so!"
                          
"If you would like to raise this as an issue, we might be able to squeeze it onto the agenda for the next meeting."
                          
"No! Every hour- styx, every cursed SECOND this goes on for is a nightmare! I want to know who did it, so that they can get rid of it and spend the rest of eternity in the darkest corner of Tartarus!"
                          
"Come, it's just a virus."
                          
"JUST A VIRUS? JUST A VIRUS?" Hades was close to tearing out chunks of his own hair. "It's one of the MOST CONTAGIOUS and FASTEST SPREADING viruses of this age! Do you know how many people it's killed?"
                          
Zeus huffed impatiently. "Sorry Athena, your campaign to smite the President will have to wait. We will address the Coronavirus issue now, although I'm not quite sure why Hades is so worked up about human suffering when I'm pretty sure he eats it for breakfast and has it woven into his pyjamas."
                          
Hades was going dangerously pale, his lips pursed in anger.
                          
"Anyway, if you would be seated Hades, we can discuss this more formally."
                          
Hades clenched his fists and stormed to his 'throne'.
                          
"Who created the virus?"
                          
Nobody moved a muscle.
                          
"Come on, I think it's a marvellous invention. Perhaps with some modification it would make an excellent tool."
                          
Still nothing.
                          
Zeus frowned."Alright. I want all of you to swear that you had no involvement in and have no knowledge of the origins of the virus."
                          
All the gods did so, but Athena hesitated.
                          
"Athena? Did you create the virus?"
                          
"No! But I don't think it was created by a god. It may have been... naturally evolved."
                          
"Don't be ridiculous! Well, if none of you did it then I suppose we can move on to Demeter's request to publicise-"
                          
"No!" Hades interrupted, causing Zeus to glare. "We need to do something to stop the virus!"
                          
"I don't see why, after all, if we didn't make it and it doesn't affect us, then it's not our responsibility!"
                          
"But it does affect ME! The underworld is overflowing! Charon's working overtime and the spirits are still queuing out of the doors!"
                          
"And it's distracting them all from their funny little disputes," Ares scowled. "North Korea was SO CLOSE! And the whole Brexit thing was only getting started... Now all my work is ruined!"
                          
Several other gods began nodding along, talking about how the virus was causing them problems.
                          
"SILENCE!" Zeus screamed. "The virus is a good thing! For example, with all the flights cancelled, I finally have the skies to myself again! Poseidon, brother, surely it's nice to have the seas clearer?"
                          
Poseidon shifted uncomfortably. "Well... It's actually a bit of a pain to have cruise ships moored in one place for weeks. And without as many boats going by, the sirens and mermaids are getting bored without sailors to play with."
                          
"Yeah, and where am I supposed to encourage drunken brawls and party if all the pubs are closed!" Dionysus called. 
                          
"There's nobody outside to appreciate my hard work..." Apollo muttered.
                          
"Now you know how I feel," Artemis muttered back.
                          
Aphrodite shuddered. "Those masks would ruin any outfit!"
                          
Athena looked down, mumbling something about "poor teachers",  "all those closed schools" and "No exams!"
                          
Zeus looked to his wife desperately, but she just shrugged.
                          
"Families unable to see each other. Couples splitting up from the stress. Grandparents not seeing their new grandchildren... It's not ideal."
                          
Zeus turned to Hermes.
                          
"Surely you're glad that more people are relying on deliveries?"
                          
Hermes pursed his lips. "Not when they're buying from my rival companies, I'm not."
                          
Zeus thought for a second, then looked at Demeter.
                          
"Wildlife is flourishing without human interference, right? That must make you happy!"
                          
"Yes, but... With factories closed, all that flour is going to waste..."
                          
In the centre of the room, Hestia gazed sadly into the fire. Nobody asked her opinion.
                          
"This is all irrelevant!" Zeus cried, "There's nothing we can do! It will simply have to sort itself out! I don't know why you're all so bothered!"
                          
"The underworld is OVERFLOWING!"
                          
"That's happened before!"
                          
"Not like this! There are more people every day on the surface, and the underworld is in turmoil! I can't deal with so many souls!"
                          
"If that's the only problem, then we'll just-"
                          
"But it's NOT the only problem! If you'd just listen to me and let me finish instead of all bickering like you did when we were children, you'd understand! Not only are too many people dying, but when they die, they still have the virus! Charon CAUGHT it and was off for three weeks whilst we built up a backlog of souls unlike any we've seen before! All of the spirits waiting for passage have had it by now, and some made it to the underworld!"
                          
"I still don't understand the big deal."
                          
"The BIG DEAL, brother, is that the virus is still contagious! It's spreading through the Fields of Asphodel like wildfire! Do you know how HARD it is to get spirits to stay six feet apart? We don't have enough space for that, especially with all the extra demand!"
                          
"Just test them and separate into those who have it and don't? The mortals have got a test, haven't they?"
                          
"They're ghosts, idiot."
                          
 Zeus looked a little disgruntled. "I still don't see how this concerns us. Just let them catch it! It's not like they can die! What's the problem?"
                          
Hades looked like he was about to explode, so Athena wisely intervened.
                          
"I think what Hades is trying to say is that ghosts are different to humans, hence the mortal-"
                          
Ares scoffed. "Did you just say hence?"
                          
Athena chose to ignore him. "AS I was saying, that is why the mortal tests don't work on the ghosts. But more importantly, the fact that the virus is able to infect the ghosts shows that it is either extremely compatible, or able to adapt extremely quickly. If we allow it to continue to spread and grow more powerful, it could pose a serious threat to us in the future."
                          
Zeus looked uncomfortable. "I, um..."
                          
Suddenly a shrill beeping filled the room. Apollo, looking embarrassed, pulled out his MyPhone and turned off the alarm. "Sorry folks, but sunrise is in 2 minutes. I gotta dash."
                          
Zeus looked relieved at the interruption. "Well, I suppose that concludes our meeting. Thanks for coming everyone!" And he flashed out with a clap of thunder, the smell of ozone surrounding the remaining 10 stunned and complaining Olympians.