Not Thinkin' Bout You

                                    

                                          


                          
Now Playing..."Not Thinkin' Bout You - RUEL"
                          


                          
It had been a week.
                          
No text messages.
                          
No late night calls.
                          
No hanging out.
                          
No Joohyun on the 9am train.
                          
After their somewhat unrestrained encounter a few nights ago, Seulgi had not heard from Joohyun. That exact same night, she had told Seulgi to leave her apartment.
                          
No explanation given, a simple command to leave her apartment.
                          
She didn't understand what had happened and what had triggered Joohyun to react in such a way. Scared, anxious and distressed was written all over Joohyun's face and that image had etched in Seulgi's brain, penetrating the deep trenches of her mind feeling guilty that she had done something wrong. She couldn't help but blame herself that she must've come onto too strong, she shouldn't have led it into something physical, ruining what they already had.
                          
But she was also confused. Joohyun showed signs that she was interested, if it really were signs, and she reciprocated what Seulgi did.
                          
She kissed her back.
                          
She asked her to stay over.
                          
She pulled her into her apartment.
                          
She wanted Seulgi.
                          
But...It didn't end the way they hoped.
                          
It was sleepless nights for Seulgi, and she woke up every morning lacking sleep and heading to the studio, less enthusiastic, less energetic and more apprehensive and temperamental than usual. She didn't want to be like this, it was unlike her. And yet, she also felt something heavy in the pit of her stomach and worse...
                          
She felt heartbroken.
                          
Joohyun made her feel all of this.
                          
She was heartbroken because of Joohyun, even though they never were anything official. They were close friends, who bantered, flirted, connected and complemented each other like Yin and Yang. And now, there was nothing.
                          
Seulgi had messaged her two days after that night, apologising to her for being so careless and for coming onto too strong and if she had hurt her anyway. As well as following up if she was feeling any better, if she was okay. But all she got was that her messaged was left on 'read'... She also left a missed call and a voicemail message but again...to no avail.
                          
Joohyun did not message or call her back.
                          
Was it all her fault?
                          
Did she ruin something?
                          
Did she scare Joohyun away?
                          
But at the same time, Seulgi needed an explanation. It didn't make sense to her as to why she had reacted this way. Various theories filled her mind, thinking that maybe she was in a relationship, if she wasn't ready, if she was just playing along and guilt got the best of her, or...something traumatic may have happened to her, which the latter assumption made Seulgi feel even more worse than she already did.
                          
It was Sunday morning and she trudges out of her bed with bags under eyes towards the kitchen wanting to quench her thirst...and heartache with water. Wendy was already awake and was in the middle of cooking breakfast for the two of them, a regular chore she did on weekends. Seulgi pours herself a glass of water and proceeds to the hold cup not yet touching her lips and just staring into space. Wendy turns around ready to put the pancakes on a plate when she notices her best friend, stalled and space out. She nudges her.