Thirteen: Miriam

                                    

                                          
Just as I went to drop the dishes Jamilah and I used to eat in the kitchen, Jide walked in. He had been coming in earlier than usual. This was the fourth day now.
                          
"Good evening.", he greeted and I mumbled the greeting back.
                          
I had avoided talking to him for some time, he wanted me to not talk to him and I was doing just that.
                          
"Where's my food?"
                          
I pointed towards the covered plates at a corner of the kitchen counter.
                          
He moved there and took the food to the dining table. I had since decided to stop asking him about what was going on with him because I simply hated when somebody was pushing me away each time I tried to be concerned. I felt that somehow he wasn't fine and he had yet to let go of something.
                          
There had to be a reason why he was so cold, so shut out from the rest of the world. He didn't talk to anybody casually except Jamilah.
                          
I laughed, since when did I start to care about people? Since people started showing you care, something answered back and I sighed.
                          
I left the kitchen and came out through the dining room. He was eating slowly, I couldn't tell if something was wrong or if he ate like that normally.
                          
"You can't keep ignoring me Miriam. We're supposed to be partners and sooner or later we'll have to talk about something work-related or something. This is a small house with only three people living in it."
                          
I paused and turned to him. I had been ignoring him totally for the past three days since he shut me out the last time. I kept wondering what this was all about.
                          
"I'll get a place ready for you when this thing is resolved, I'm working hard at the case and I've been able to get a few places that have nice but cheap accommodation."
                          
"Thank you but how am I supposed to keep up with the bills?", I realized that was the first proper sentence I had made to him.
                          
"You don't have money?"
                          
I shook my head, no.
                          
He sighed.
                          
"I thought you had a kind of business going on before you came here. What happened to that? I thought you'd saved money."
                          
He had brought up the brothel issue, I tried to suppress any emotion trying to get out.
                          
"First of all Jide, you can hardly call that a business, second of all, the money I saved could barely take care of me for a whole month and lastly, there are reasons for that."
                          
"Reasons are?"
                          
I blinked. What was this? I became protective immediately.
                          
"None of your business."
                          
His brows furrowed, I didn't care care though.
                          
"It's very much my business Miriam because I am trying to fix you a good place to stay after all this and I can't do it if I don't know what you have, I'm trying to help you."
                          
"Why do you even bother Jide? You want me out of here the second you declare that you've gotten through the case. I could have just easily died and you could have still been able to handle the case, you're a detective, you could have figured it out."
                          
I finished off knowing I had raised my voice. Jamilah came out looking confused. She asked about what was going on but we didn't seem to acknowledge her presence.
                          
"Why are you so stubborn Miriam? Why don't you just let me know what's going on so that I can help you?"
                          
I laughed.
                          
"Me? Stubborn? Seriously? Don't you think that question goes both ways? I mean there is obviously something wrong with you and you're being quiet about it. You've had Jamilah for a long time enough to trust her with everything going on around you yet you choose not to and I'm the one being stubborn?"
                          
I tried to steady my breathing. Gosh, I didn't even know where this courage came out from. Jamilah just stood there, in between Jide and I, he was breathing hard with a sea of emotions welled up in his eyes.
                          
"Jide—"
                          
"No, good night.", he had cutJamilah off when she tried to reach out to him.
                          
He walked past her and went straight upstairs. I didn't know why he kept pushing her away and why she still kept trying. She looked at me, I expected her to lash out at me for agitating her cousin but instead she looked sad, lonely even.
                          
I closed the distance between us and hugged her.
                          
"I'm sorry.", I whispered, "those words had to come out sooner or later."
                          
She held me tighter and sobbed. I let out a shaky breath. Jamilah was crying. It seemed so out of place.
                          
"What's wrong Jamilah? Stop crying."
                          
"Every single day Miriam. One day he might kill himself. You should have just let him be."
                          
I almost pushed her away for saying that last sentence. I knew I couldn't do what she did, I couldn't stand by and watch somebody kill themself slowly when I could reach out to them, just as they reached out to me. My knees became weak when I felt a certain kind of guilt engulf me.
                          
"I'm very sorry Jamilah.", I said instead.
                          
We stood there for minutes before she pulled away and sniffed.
                          
"Just get me some water, I'll be fine.", she wiped her tears and attempted a smile. How she was able to smile at times of trouble, I wouldn't know.
                          
"Sure.", I smiled back and watch her retreat to the room. After dropping Jide's plates and cup on the counter, I got a bottle of cold water to the room and gave Jamilah to drink.
                          
After that, I excused myself. I had to be alone but there was also something I wanted to do first — apologise.
                          
I took a deep breath and started up the stairs slowly as if I would slip at any second. When I finally reached his door, I pushed it open without thinking and gasped at the sight before me.
                          
Jide was on the floor with a half-empty bottle of something alcoholic. His buttons were undone and he muttered things while he hiccuped. He didn't even seem to take notice of me.
                          
I closed the door not willing Jamilah to see what I saw and rushed to take the bottle from his hand.
                          
That was when I had his attention. He looked at me like I had snatched a million-naira cheque from him. I noticed he was already drunk but still had little cognition. He looked at me with surprise etched on his face and laughed hysterically.
                          
My brows furrowed.
                          
"Miriam.", it rolled off his mouth with no emotion, "You're here."
                          
I didn't waste time in dropping the bottle far from him as I tried to get him to bed.
                          
"Wait here Jide. I'm coming.", I whispered before running downstairs to get some garri and water. It was supposed to make him sober.
                          
As I came down the stairs I couldn't help but picture Jide in his drunk state. It was amazing and yet horrifying how the strongest person I knew became vulnerable in a matter of minutes.
                          
~~~
                          
Author's note: So... We've gotten here. Miriam has finally caught Jide drinking. Be prepared for the next chapter and please put a smile on my face but tapping on the little star there and sliding in comments.
                          
Much love from your girl 😘