thirteen

                                    

                                          

13| it's you

"you know... you don't have to do this. i don't want to force you to go to school with me- i feel bad, if that's the case." taehyung mumbled quietly, looking down.
they were on their way to taehyung's school and it has been silent the whole way long. it was suffocating for taehyung, because he got the feeling jungkook is pressured.
he was for sure pressured, but not because of taehyung. he wanted to go. he's just nervous and scared to enter a building like that. 
to be surrounded by hundreds of people around his age. will everything be the same as 4 years ago? what will the other's think about him, will they bully him again?
it's not like jungkook can't defend himself anymore- hell, he could take down a whole group of bullies. he had a lot of freetime, working out is one of his most passionate hobbies.
it's the fear of not getting accepted and treated right. 
but he'll take this step, because he wants to live. he wants to enjoy his life, gain the needed experiences, because after spending 4 years alone at home and never leaving the house- he doesn't know how the world looks now.
jungkook was only 14 when his whole world changed. he's 18 now, everything will be fine right?
jungkook stopped walking, after taehyung's words. he sighed. "don't worry... i'm doing this because i want it. i want to live, taehyung."
"j-jungkook." taehyung was confused at the sad tone the younger held in his voice and obviously tried to hide.
"i-i'm sorry, i- i didn't want to-"
"hey tae, i said don't worry. i'm fine, you did nothing wrong." jungkook smiled and taehyung nodded lightly.
they continued walking then. "you will understand everything, when i tell you about my past angel. you must be confused." jungkook chuckled.
taehyung smiled sheepishly. "i told you that i'll wait till you're ready to tell me." he said and jungkook smiled lightly. "thank you."
it was silent now, but not the suffocating silence. this one was comfortable.
it let them dive into their thoughts. especially taehyung, who remembered jungkook's words from the past night. 
"i think i like you more than that."
call him annoying or whatever, but he desired to know. to know what jungkook meant by it. it's obvious, right? but deep down, taehyung doesn't believe into these few words.
he wants to believe that what he thinks is true, but he is scared to get disappointed.
he glanced to his left, jungkook was looking forward, not missing taehyung looking at him. taehyung was oblivious of how often jungkook had caught him looking at him.
but... should taehyung ask jungkook? will it be strange if he asks him?
there's only one way to find out
"kookie." taehyung took a small breath and clutched his eyes together.
"what is, angel?" jungkook turned to look at taehyung, who was having a mentally battle wether he should really ask or not.
"w-when you said that last night... did you mean you like me... as a man?"
definitely not the way taehyung wanted to sound, but it worked and made jungkook laugh at his uncertainty. 
"when i said that last night, i meant that i like you a lot. to an extent, where it's more than bros... i'm unsure of what i mean exactly." 
oh guy, was he sure.
taehyung had claimed everything of him, is the one making his heartbeat arise, is the one who has been there for him, without even knowing what was wrong.
jungkook could easily say that he loves taehyung.
he could admit it easily. but he didn't want.
because he doesn't want to get hurt too much when taehyung finds out about his life and leaves him.
so he stays quiet, although a lot of signs are present.
"don't waste your time thinking about that taehyung. you still don't know me."
a pout decorated taehyung's lips. "of course i know you." he huffed.
jungkook stopped. "you don't."
they were now face to face, taehyung looking at jungkook with and slightly angry pout and jungkook looking at him with a stern face, yet soft eyes. the tension was real.
"jungkook... you are thoughtful, lovely, handsome and nice. you have such a big heart, i can tell at how easy your eyes glistening up by the little things. i know you, more than you think. you just won't believe that someone knows you and still likes you, but kook. 
maybe i don't know your favorite color, your birthday, where you live, your past- but i know what makes you happy. it's the simple things that do. the way you talked about colors was mesmerizing jungkook- it's what makes you happy. 
you think i don't know you, because i don't know your past. whatever happened in the past is over. i know it left a big scar in your heart and i figured that the smallest things can open it again, but it's over. 
you're right, i don't know the past you. i never met the past you, don't know what you've done and what happened. 
but i'm here with the present you. the you that makes my heart flutter alone by looking at. the you that makes me happy and that i don't wanna lose. you can trust me jungkook, you know i won't judge you, i would never. 
a-and you're precious to me, so stop being sad and smile."
a small smile danced on taehyung's lips as he looked up into jungkook's wide eyes. 
never in his life had someone talked so gently about him.
and he realized, taehyung does know him. he does so good. without even being told one glimpse about jungkook's past, the older knows him.
"a-angel... you're also precious to me." without a second thought, jungkook hugged the older, who smiled warmly.
"so precious." jungkook repeated, which made taehyung's heart escalate on his inside. his arms also went up around jungkook and he hugged him tightly, taking in the addicting scent of the younger.
"there's something else that makes me happy, but it isn't simple." jungkook whispered into taehyung's ear.
taehyung hummed, wanting for jungkook to continue. 
jungkook moved a little back, not cutting the hug off. he looked at taehyung, who looked at him with wide, unsure eyes.
the younger leaned closer to taehyung's face, placing a feather light kiss on the older's cheek.
"it's you."