Conversations

                                    

                                          
Cameron did not know how to approach MJ after she lashed out at Sandra. He wanted her to eat something, but could not ask her out to dinner or tell her it was time to go home; since she did not want to go to dinner, he brought the dinner to her.
                          
"What are you doing?" She asked as he started to remove all the documents out of her reach.
                          
Now she speaks, he thought, consciously rolling his eyes. She had pretended not to hear or see him when he asked her to stop working for a second and eat.
                          
He closed her laptop and put it aside, and then he set the desk into a makeshift dinner table. "Dinner is served," he said, finishing up the last touch by placing a serviette in front of her.
                          
"Which restaurant is still open at this time?" She asked as he put the paper bag on the side.
                          
Cameron took a seat opposite her and opened his takeaway container. "It's crazy, right? I mean, who would be up and still in their office at this time?" He grinned mischievously to her glare.
                          
"So, what did you get?" She asked, opening her own container.
                          
"Hot fire-grilled chicken, bread rolls, spiced chips, fried vegetables and Caesar salad," Cameron said proudly.
                          
MJ smiled. "Thank you." 
                          
Cameron smiled as MJ dug into her food and ate passionately. "Bon appetit." 
                          
"Did you at least buy a drink?" MJ asked halfway through their quiet meal. Cameron looked around the table as if expecting a drink to magically appear out of nowhere. MJ sighed and shook her head. "Will some whiskey do?" 
                          
Cameron smiled mischievously. Mission accomplished! He thought. "Water would have been fine, but sure," he said sceptically with a nonchalant shrug.
                          
MJ stood up and got a bottle of Whiskey and two glasses from her stand, and then poured for them both before placing the bottle at the centre of the table.
                          
"Don't be such a baby, a few glasses won't hurt," she said mockingly with a devious smirk as she took her seat.
                          
"I'm not a baby, see?" Cameron said with a single gulp of his half-full glass of whiskey, emptying everything in a go.
                          
MJ smirked proudly, and Cameron hid his victory behind a mischievous grin. Who's playing who? He thought. In his experience, history had proven that MJ was more open when she was drunk, that was the only way one would ever find out what was going through her mind.
                          
They continued eating their meal until their last bite with alcohol talks. By the time they were done, MJ had successfully finished her food and was slightly tips. 
                          
Speak about killing two birds with one stone. Cameron smirked. "I'm so full, I haven't eaten this much in a long time!" She said with a yawn while stretching her arms tiredly. "Well, expect for the one time Logan fed me at his house during his engagement party," she blurted out and just slumped on her chair.
                          
"Sounds like you were having a great time," Cameron said suggestively.
                          
A sad look crossed her face momentarily, and she gave him a weak smile. "Now and again," she muttered. "I thought I was just going to do business and that would be it, but..." She shook her head and gulped.
                          
Did something happen between her and Logan? I mean, why would he even come up here to begin with? He did not know Alastair Cooper, and Logan never liked Mrs Dos Santos, why would he come to England with her of all people? Why not Lola or Natalia? 
                          
Cameron believed something happened in Cape Town, that he was not aware of, and somehow, everyone seemed to be covering it up.
                          
"Why won't you tell me what happened in Cape Town. Anything I should know?" He asked.
                          
MJ sighed. "A lot of things happened in Cape Town, Cameron. Most of which I'm not ready to talk about," she said knowingly. Cameron wanted to argue, but there was no point, she already figured what he was trying to do. "On a positive note though, I met this girl, Shannon Botha," she said with a secretive smile.
                          
Cameron's ears perked up in interest. Now that's something! "That troublemaker? How did that happen?"
                          
MJ sat up straight and poured herself another drink. "It's a long story. But we stayed together at Sonya's place."
                          
"What? Tell me you are joking!" He laughed, shaking his head.
                          
"She's quite handy when she wants something."
                          
"If I didn't know better, I would say you are impressed," he said, eyeing her suspiciously.
                          
She started playing with her glass, twirling it around as she dived deeper into her thoughts and memories; the longing in her eyes told Cameron that there was more to the acquittance than what his playful mind could think of. 
                          
"I let her in because I saw myself in her," MJ said after a few seconds of silence and glass-twirling, slumping back in her chair. "She reminded me of who I could have been in another life. She was so free, so happy, something that I am not. And I guess I admired her for that." She smiled weakly, looking at him but seemingly looking through and past him. "Sometimes I wish I could be her for just a second; be carefree, dance, sing, drink and smoke, party, and just to live in the moment." She ran a hand through her hair and closed her eyes. "I didn't know it was possible to be that...alive. Cameron, I feel like I missed out on a lifetime, and I can't get that back. I look at this company and realize that this is the only thing I have to my name and that it could disappear anytime."
                          
She seemed as though she wanted to say more, but she was holding back. She looked at him expectantly waiting for him to say something or convince her that she was wrong. Her eyes were literally pleading with him even though the rest of her face made her look like she did not care.
                          
Cameron opened and closed his mouth like a fish, not knowing what to say or where to begin. "MJ, where is all this coming from?" 
                          
She stood up and walked around the desk, and then sat on the couch with her head buried in her hands. She groaned out and pulled on her hair, momentarily staring at the ceiling as if it held all the answers of the world. "My Cape Town trip was full of surprises. I met people who made me question my life and past decisions. Cameron, there's a whole world out there and I just... I just don't belong."
                          
Cameron wheeled his chair to where she was seated and took her hands. "Listen, MJ. I'm not saying this to spite you, but have you seen your therapist since you returned from SA?" MJ shook her head. "I feel like you are trying to figure yourself out, but you don't know how to go about it. You've been through so much lately; you don't eat, you don't sleep, you are always emotional, and you are paranoid." She glared at him. "You are paranoid," he repeated, and she sighed in defeat.
                          
"Blair won't want to see me."
                          
"Why not?"
                          
She looked around, not meeting his eyes. "I had her license evoked a few months ago."
                          
He groaned and dropped her hands. There was no surprise in there, it was typical of MJ Billings; if she did not what she wanted, she retaliated in the worst way possible. Her therapist probably said or suggested something she did not like.
                          
A thought crossed his mind; if she hasn't been seeing her therapist, then where has she been getting her medication from?