36

                                    

                                          
Today was the day I summoned Hoseok, I was scared.
                          
How would he react? Will he accept me? Will he forget about me? Will he kill me out of hate? 
                          
I didn't know, all I did know is this is what I wanted to do.
                          
I figured doing it right away wasn't the best. So I will wait for night to fall. 
                          
Namjoon and Jin talked to me the entire day making sure I was ok and I was sure I was ready.
                          
I always reassured them, I missed him to much. I needed him by me.
                          
I waited for the day to pass by looking at photos of me and him, laughing.
                          
I see a photo of him when we were in the mall messing around.
                          
It was when he took of his glasses and he was cross eyed.
                          
There was a video of him messing with me that he recorded and I threw an egg at him cause I was mad.
                          
A photo of us together at a small dinner we went to where we talked about each other with out the deal in the conversation.
                          
A photo of the night we were on the balcony when he told me I should have a peaceful place.
                          
A photo Jin sent me of  Hoseok and I dancing.
                          
I smiled at each and every one of them. I transferred everything from my old phone onto my new one.
                          
I deleted everything with me and Jimin instantly but kept me and Hoseok.
                          
Looking back at the photo of us at the club I remember what that guy told me.
                          
' he's closer then you think.' I left of a soft breath. That person was so right, he was.
                          
When I first summoned him, he teased me but he didn't hesitate in helping me. 
                          
He would take care of me and respected me. He always asked for my permission before he did anything unless it's teasing me.
                          
The more I think about it, the more I realize that I lead him on and made him think I liked him back.
                          
I did I just didn't know yet.  God do I wish I knew then. He was right there.
                          
But it's ok because I'll have him again soon.
                          
I look at the time and sigh, it's not even dark yet. I decide to watch a movie.
                          
Half way into the movie I remember about something.
                          
I walk to my room and then I open my closet. There hanging is none other then Hoseoks jacket from when we went clubbing.
                          
That night I left him on the dance floor after I chased someone who wasn't the person I wanted.
                          
He tried to hold me back but I begged him to let go, I can't forget his eyes, as I left him on the dance floor alone.
                          
It was like one of those scenes in movies when the person breaks.
                          
That night I wish he was home when I came home. If he was  I don't know what I would have done.
                          
There were days that I almost left Jimin behind because my body was trying to tell me so hard that I wanted Hoseok.
                          
I take his jacket and put it on. It's still really big on me and it makes me laugh. 
                          
I walk down stairs with it and unpause the movie. I cuddle up in the jacket and smile.
                          
Soon, you'll be here soon.
                          
I end up passing out and waking up to see the time. It's 11:23pm 
                          
I curse at myself. I hurry up and get up.
                          
I grab all the materials I need.
                          
 I get 3 candles, I put them in a upside down triangle form.
                          
Then I get some salt and sprinkle the tiniest amount. You get a marker or anything to draw with and make a pentagon with a circle around it. 
                          
I stand in the middle and chant "To the demon I am summoning, I bid the to rise from hell and do my bidding, you will be in my debt and pay for my regards. I will seek and use you as I please." as I cut any part of me for myself to bleed.
                          
I let the blood drop onto the pentagon. Please Hoseok please...