05 || petty

                                    

                                          

                            

                                
                            
                              
                                  
                              
                              
                                
                                  
                                  
                                
                              
                             
                            
                            
                          
                          
                          
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SIX LAME YEARS HAVE GONE BY, and to be completely honest, life has been doing me pretty well. 
                          
Yeah, my mother is still not willing to spend any more time with me than she has to, which is quite a lot considering we train almost 6 hours every day, but that's different, you know? I want to spend some actual time with her, as in painting, or even talking about my future plans. 
                          
But unfortunately, due to her rather huge spendings on oversea flights, she had found herself pretty tight on money, due to her not having any source of income. 
                          
Of course, I'm still underaged, and the public would send backlash upon her if she were to put me in the spotlight at such a young age.
                          
So having no other options, she opted out to selling some artworks to galleries or just some fans of hers. Selling it wasn't a problem at all, many actually fight for it the second she puts it on a bid, going up as high as thirty million dollars. 
                          
Heck, I know what you're going to say, that's a lot of money! But really, I think that it's more of a steal, trust me. 
                          
My mother may seem like a careless person, but when it comes to her artworks, she spends literally hours on end, adding every single crumb of details that even ants wouldn't be able to see with their naked eyes. (If ants even have eyes.)
                          
She doesn't leave her art studio until it's finished, most of the time lasting days, even weeks of her painting with nothing more but coffee and wine. On those days, our trainings are canceled, and I was to not disturb her at all in any sort of way.
                          
I personally take the time to push myself harder and train from dawn till sunset, not taking any breaks in between unless I had to. I still hold the promise close to my heart, and I think my mother does as well. I would do anything, really, to see her smile genuinely for even a split second.
                          
Our relationship can be summarized as more of a coworker and boss relationship rather than a mother and daughter relationship. It's sad, I know.
                          
Yes, it gets stressful at times, not having anyone to rely on emotionally except for Ocha-chan isn't really helping my mental state. And she isn't enough either, since there is only so much I could tell her. 
                          
Speaking of her, I've realized that she had become more distant recently, instead of eating lunch together outside near our favorite spot under the shades of trees, she leaves me behind in the dust, sitting with another group of girls.
                          
To be more specific and make matters worse, she's hanging out with the kind of girls who only knows how to gossip, yes, the 'mean' girls. And guess what? For some apparent reason, they hate me. I don't understand, I literally don't even talk to them, half of the time I don't even know about their existence, but they still hate me, like what the heck did I even do?
                          
Actually, scratch that, I'm not that stupid like those main protagonists of Wattpad fanfics. When your mother is a pro hero veteran who earns heaps of money and fame from selling masterpieces, it's practically unavoidable at this point for them to feel envious, or even jealous towards me. And those feelings turn into hate, and hate drives them into a spiraling staircase downwards into the world of hell, where they'd boil any sort of rumors they could brew.
                          
Not gonna lie though, I enjoy hearing them every once in a while, even those about me. I mean, who doesn't like tea? Their creativity is so beyond my world; I think they'd actually be a better writer than the author writing this book.
                          
But anyway, back to Ocha-chan. I've realized a trending of ours, in which I grab my lunch, go to our usual spot, and wait for my only best friend. But alas, she never comes. "I'm sooo sorry, Ma-chan~" she bowed, clapping her hands together in front of her face.
                          
"I swear I'd be there with you tomorrow."
                          
Uh-huh.
                          
"It's okay, really! I was sitting with someone else, so I wasn't lonely." I chuckled.
                          
"Ah, then are you fine if I sit with someone else for the rest of the year?"
                          
Huh?
                          
"I mean, I don't feel like we are as close as we were anyways, things get awkward, ya know?"
                          
"..."
                          
"Matsu?"
                          
"...That's fine with me...Uraraka, I mean, you don't really have to ask for my permission..."
                          
"Thank you!"
                          
And off she went to her new flock of friends, leaving with our friendship, and my smile. Even if I was to call her back, there's no way she would give them back, especially the smile that even I am surprised I could even put up till now. I have nothing to smile about, considering most people smile because they're in a positive state. Without Ocha- Uraraka, there is nothing in my life that could make me feel the need to even crack a grin. 
                          
Everything disappears so quickly, six years of friendship is gone... just like that.
                          
Am I that unbearable to be with? 
                          
Am I hard to get close to? 
                          
Am I too awkward for people?
                          
Is it because I complain too much about my mother to her?
                          
Or is she just judging me like the others because of my mother?
                          
'No, of course not!' I snorted. 
                          
'Y/N, you didn't do anything, you're probably just overthinking stuff again like you always do.' 
                          
Dismissing my thoughts, I began my way towards our, well now just my usual spot, only to find that it had already been occupied. "Ah~ this IS a wonderful place to have lunch, Ochako! I can't believe I haven't known this place earlier!"
                          
I froze.
                          
A series of giggles passed throughout the small circle. "Hehe, I know, right! I found this place with Matsu-chan awhile ago."
                          
"Oh, do you think she'll mind if we steal this spot for the rest of the year?"
                          
"I mean school ends in about two weeks, so she won't be missing much."
                          
"True, true. But I don't want to upset her though, who knows what her mom would say?" One whispered.
                          
"Oh, frick, you're right! We should move." 
                          
"Ahh guys~ I don't wanna move though, I already got everything laid out." Ocha- Uraraka whined.
                          
"That's nothing; her slutty mom might sue us!" 
                          
"Ah, you don't have to worry about that," I replied. "I can guarantee you that she won't spend even a gram of money on something as petty as you sitting in my spot.
                          
"M-Matsu chan?" Ocha- fucking dammit, Uraraka blurted.
                          
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1101 words
                          
edited 3 - 26 - 20