37

                                    

                                          
The red porsche is parked in front of the house. I open the car door as fast as I can. My body makes it's way to the front door and I quikly grab my keys to enter the house. 
                          
The house I have been living in while being lied to my whole life. My dad never cared about me nor my mother. I was scared that the truth would hurt me. But it didn't just hurt me, it absolutely broke me into little pieces and there is no one that will be there to pick them up. 
                          
 I am broken.
                          
Once I enter, I am greeted by the delicious smell of someone's cooking. I bet it's my grandmother making her popular cupcakes but my hunger has absolutely disappeared, I have absolutely no appetite. Instead I feel this anger in me building up again, the feeling I always get when I am about to have another episode. 
                          
With my hands formed into fists,I walk into the direction of the kitchen. My fingernails bore into the soft skin on both my palms. I hear laughter and two well known voices. My anger starts building up even more when I hear my father's voice. 
                          
Once I open the huge doors made out of black glass that leads to the kitchen, my eyes scan over a very well known figure. My dad is sitting there with the most happy facial expression ever. His eyes meet mine and suddenly his smile fades away. 
                          
I look at him dead empty. There is no sign of happiness written on my face. My body is limp and my hands form two fists. I don't move closer nor back away from him, I just keep my place in the door opening. The horror in my eyes says it all. My grandmother is also quiet now, she just looks between the two of us while slowly it hits her. 
                          
'Where were you ?' she asks with a fake smile now plastered on her face. She tries to stir up the now cold atmosphere, make us happy again with her wide smile but that doesn't work on me anymore. 
                          
'I went to visit my beloved sister.'
                          
That's where hell breaks lose. 
                          
The horror on my father's and grandmother's face is unexplainable. All the color leave my dads face and he starts looking like a dead body. His eyes become hard and his mouth is now a straight line. He is in absolute shock at my answer. All the lies and secrets are out in the air and now I know the complete truth. There is no lying anymore. 
                          
'Angel', my dad speaks calmly but also in a somehow warning tone as if he can feel that I am about to explode. But I am not going to do anything like that. I won't explode because there is nothing to explode about. This is not just some nightmare. This is real life and it won't undo my father's mistakes if I start screaming and crying now. I keep all the anger for myself, for now. 
                          
'You lied to me', I say',both of you, right grandma?'
'Don't speak to her like that.'
My father warns me again but I don't dare to listen to him anymore. He is nothing for less then a liar. All of them are liars, no one cares about me. The only person that really cared is now dead. 
                          
'Don't even try to warn me, you are no one to warn me',I speak again.
'My whole life has been a lie. I wondered why you always worked so much and never made time to spend some time with me. But now I know why, you were too busy with your other daughter.'
'That's not true !'
'Yes, yes it is. But you know, it doesn't matter anymore because now you actually have one daughter.'
'What does that supposed to mean ?'
'It means I am leaving.'
                          
With one last glance at my father, I turn around and walk away from the kitchen. He calls my name over and over again but I don't dare to glance at them again. 
                          
This is over. 
                          
Everything that happend today is just too much for me and I need to run away from here. 
                          
I need time away from this place.
                          
~
                          
I lock the door in my room. Then I turn around to grab my backpack with all the stuff for school in, including my laptop and airpods. After packing my school back pack, I search for my huge purse that I always used to take with me on vacation. It is so big that almost all of my clothing van fit into it. My room looks the same as before just less personal. Almost everything that I  really need are already packed and the car keys are placed into my bavk pocket of my jeans. The other stuff I will have to leave here for now.
                          
'Angel, open up now !'
                          
Also the door to my room is currently being bombarded by my dads screams. He is yelling my name non stop and my ears are staring to hurt. But I don't dare to even step one bit closer to that door. The last thing I need right now is my dad trying to make it all good. Nothing will change the feeling of betrayal in my heart and he is the cause of that. 
                          
'Angel !'
                          
I keep on cleaning my room  and packing my things at the same time. 
                          
'I said open that door!'
                          
Then I put on grey sweatpants and a grey oversized hoodie. The fit is lazy but still looks kinde cute. My hair is put into a downward messy bun and I am wearing no make up at all. Instead I just pull the hoodie over my head.
                          
'Angel open that goddamn door !'
                          
After what feels like forever, my dad finally walks away from my door. I hear his steps on the stairs and then the front door opens. I quietly open my door to hear what is happening downstairs. 
                          
'I am going to Greenpeace and find out what exactly Sophia told her.'
                          
I flinch at the way how normally her name rolls of his tongue. I hear a quiet answer from my grandmother. 
'Let her calm down a little.'
'I will try', it's the last thing he says before quietly closing the front door and so do I. 
                          
Then I walk over to my huge window, my eyes scan the figure of my dad unlocking his car. He takes the gwagon wich means I have a chance of taking his other car because I still have his second pair of car keys. I smirk to myself as a plan forms itself in my mind. 
                          
~